Once is Once
by Keyhala
Summary: The same second that short and messy raven black hair was revealed, he staggered one step backwards. Those deep, black eyes looked calmly back at him. He took a shaky breath. “…L…”[Full summary inside]Yaoi.RaitoxL.[Spoils to vol7][chapter 14 FINALLY up]
1. Chapter 1

**Warning:** **Both disclaimer and story include spoilers up to and including volume 7! After that, not even I know what happens, but if you haven't read volume 7, and don't want to know major spoilers – do NOT read. If you don't mind spoilers or have already read, then please go ahead **

**Welcome, all of thee! Yesh, this is a story made by me, Keyhala! I have NO idea how long it will be, or how often I'll update, but I will try and finish it, at least Anywho! On to the important stuff!**

**Disclaimer:** **I do not own Death Note or any of it's Characters. If I did, L would never have died and There would've been a lot more yaoi laugh**

**Warnings:** **Yaoi (malexmale), Violence, Language**

**Well, with that in mind, why don't we get started? And my dears, please don't forget to review It would make a poor authoresses' day if you could take the time to write a decent review! Tell me what you think **

Chapter 1

"…_-The NPA has been in a lot of trouble since last-weeks statement from the government, what do you have to say about it?_" A sigh slipped from his lips. This again? He had received at least ten calls like this the last four days. It was both getting obnoxious and tiring.

"I haven't sensed any sort of complication. It's true that the government's suggestion of cutting down the amount of policemen is worth a thought, but we still have to remember that the police force's work is mainly to **prevent **crimes from happening. Even though it now by law is decided that Kira's work is the rightful judgement passed on upon those who break the law, we are to prevent it from even happening, if possible." The man on the other side was silent, pondering over his answer. Perfect. "If that was all, I bid you a good day."

He hung up without remorse, leaning back into the chair with something in between a snort and a sigh. It was always about it nowadays. How the police force was no longer useful. Kira's judgement had made it all so much easier for people to live nowadays. Except for Kira himself. Yagami Raito, age 24, was leading the NPA since the year earlier, when he had made the capture of Mello and Near possible. He snorted at the thought. Even though they had been L's so-called 'true successors', they hadn't been able to withstand in the end at all.

True, they had tricks not even the original, L, had used. But they never showed the same challenge as the original. It was almost a pity. "Tsk, what am I thinking?" He shook his head, which caught the other individual in the room, the shinigami Ryuk's, attention.

"Thinking what?" He glanced over at the shinigami, not surprised to find the reason for the slightly muffled sentence to be an apple.

"I was just hit by the thought that it was almost a pity that I made Rem kill Ryuzaki, or whatever his true name now was, four years ago." Ryuk blinked at him.

"A pity?" He echoed.

"Since he was killed, it has been too easy… it has gotten… boring. And I tend to get very… extreme when bored." After all, it was his boredom that had made him start this mission. It was his boredom that had led him to find the Death Note, and use it to kill off the criminals in the world. And after that – the ones who opposed him. In the end, acceptance had been found, and the world was a better place. Though the self-acknowledged god of this peaceful world had not been satisfied by the result.

"Mhm, I know." The god of death nodded quickly, before snatching another apple from his table. "And since Misa died, you don't have anyone to easily find names anymore. You'd have to research everything yourself."

"That's alright, Ryuk." He said, calmly. Misa Amane. There had been rumours that they would get married. After all, they had been living together for four years. And then… sadly - his lips quirked in a small smirk – she had died. All of a sudden, she just hadn't woken up from her sleep one morning. No doctor could explain why. It just was her time, they said.

And that was just what it was. After having done the so-called 'eye-trade-deal' with the Shinigami Rem and the Shinigami Ryuk, she had cut her remaining lifespan in half. And then that halved lifespan in half, too. In the end, she had lasted for four years. But that didn't matter to him. Four years had been enough to 'clean' the world of the scum that had resided there before. The only pity was the fact that if a new threat would arise, he couldn't use her eyes to see the name of the person without having to ask it first.

But she had known it. She knew he didn't love her. She loved him, and was willing to be his tool. Her choice alone. So now he was back to solitude. Without anyone. Living in the outskirt of Tokyo, alone, he barely had any contact with his family. His father had resigned from the police force the year before, Sayu was studying abroad and his mother was just hanging around the house, as she had always done.

And he was fine with that. He enjoyed being alone. The only thing he had ever known enjoying more than being alone, except for killing of criminals with the Death Note, was… "But I really do feel that it was a pity. The most amusing time during my life as 'Kira' was during the time I played that little 'who finds who first' game with L."

"Agreed." The shinigami nodded with finality. "During that time you had the most brilliant schemes going on, as well as the fact that it was amusing to have you both chase each other around in your word battles."

"We were thinking in the same line of thought all the time. That made the chase interesting." He continued, before switching on the TV daintily. He leaned back as the news reports came up. He didn't really listen, but his as his ears most definitively heard the word 'murder', he sat up straight, fixing his eyes on the screen. "Murder?"

It was a female, age 24, they explained. She had supposedly gotten into a fight with her friend, in the end having slammed the other female's head into the concrete wall with a force enough to kill her… Yeah, yeah. That wasn't interesting. He narrowed his eyes but smiled, pleased, when a picture came up. She was apparently sought for by the police, but that wasn't the reason for the picture and the name, Tamaki Ayako. 'L' – at that time meaning himself - had ordered images and names to be erased from news report as of the last year, the year 2009. True, there had been reports that he'd been a fake one - which was the cause – but the government and the majority of the police thought it might still be wise. After the Mello and Near incident, he had 'resigned' from the role of L. Mainly because he had to now act upon L being dead, as had come out. And that wasn't a problem. It was just less work for him. But anyway, the rule of the images and names.

Even if Kira had become law, that rule had been applied to minor crimes. But sometimes the news still showed them. And why? He smirked as he reached for his drawer, pulling it open and at the same time finding a pen on his desk. Flipping a page open in the black book, he leaned back and quickly scribbled the name down into the notebook, followed by a small message. Better show them she hadn't just passed away. He smirked and returned both items to their previous location, before returning to the TV. At any moment, someone would have seen the woman come staggering. After all…

"_The woman has just been seen near the Aoyama area, where she ran through heading for the back alleys. The local police are now following…"_ He smiled, waiting. The message should be clear, and a beautiful one at such. "_She's been found – and she's dead!_" He looked at the watch. Just on time. As always.

He could hear the shinigami laugh behind him as the new woman kept blabbering. C'mon, get to the important point already! He tapped his fingers against the desk while waiting. Anytime soon.

"_The message written on the wall in front of the dead woman,Tamaki Ayako, has now been deciphered!_" **Finally**! He smirked still. He had made the woman cut herself – nowhere too vital, mind you – and write the message in her own blood. Only because he was bored, of course. People would already know who wore the trademark of killing criminals with heart-attacks. "_I will know cite it! 'The rightful judgement has now been passed out over thee. Let this be a warning for those who come after.' With this information, we might be almost certain that this is a judgement passed out by Kira._"

"Bravo. You've read your homework." He mumbled, before turning the TV off. There. Now there was nothing fun more to do. That was it for today, he also guessed.

"Hey, Raito." He looked over his shoulder at the shinigami again. "I'm out of apples."

"…" He narrowed his eyes slightly, but shook his head and pressed the button on the intercom. "Isao-san?"

A smooth, female voice answered. "_Yes, Yagami-san?_"

"Would you be so kind and bring up some more apples to my office?"

"_Again?_ _Dear god, you sure eat a lot of those. That cannot be healthy."_

"Just make sure it's done." He said, still calmly with a polite tone, before sitting back again. "Happy now?" The only answer he got was a wide grin, and he sighed. A knock was heard on his door. "Come in."

Isao-san wasn't the only one entering his office at this time, so was a fuming Matsuda. Matsuda was still working with him on the now almost completely put down Kira case. They were the only ones on it. And well, you could say Matsuda was alone. He was almost considering killing him just for that reason, but since that would only be a waste of time, he had pushed it aside.

"He did it again!" Matsuda growled, as Isao-san put down the new basket of apples on the desk. Raito noted that Ryuk probably would want to dig in as quickly as possible, so he calmly faced the other. "He killed that woman!"

"I saw." He nodded. "Most likely because they showed the face and name, despite what we've told them. People out there think he's a living god, Matsuda. And that's what he wants. We have the majority of the world against us."

"Don't tell me you're giving up, too!?"

"Of course not." He gave the other a serious look. "I'm still very much determined to avenge Ryuzaki, Watari and all the other victims. I **will** solve this case, Matsuda. For their sake."

"…Of course." Matsuda looked down, in shame. "O-Of course I can't forget that, either. I just felt a sudden rush of fear that you might be giving up."

"I won't. So don't worry. Try and find out who was the editor for the news report, and bring him in for questioning in secrecy. Offer money, if needed." The man nodded and then quickly left the office. He picked one of the apples up and then threw it over his shoulder, knowing Ryuk to catch it.

"You're still sounding so serious, Raito," The shinigami said between bites. "You are still as sharp of an actor as always."

"How would I otherwise have survived this far?" He questioned, smiling. "I've relinquished the name L, and the person known as L, as well. I've gained the top position of Japan's police force, and – to boot – I'm worldwide acknowledged as the saviour of the innocent."

"Yes, Kira has become a big name." Ryuk affirmed. "I still hold on to the fact that you probably are the best possible person to have found the Death Note I dropped. And now you have both that one, the one Rem possessed, **and** the one Misa held. That's three in total."

"So I have one here, one at home and one in my bag." He said, a small smirk pulling at his lips. "The one here and at home won't make anyone see a shinigami. Only the one I always carry around. Safety is a great necessity even if Kira's accepted, don't you agree?"

"Can't say I don't." Ryuk shrugged and grabbed another apple.

** DeathNote **

Everyone knew that there always was a turning point. But who could've predicted that the turning point would be the thirteenth of August the year 2010? On top of that, it just **had** to be Friday the thirteenth. He had been on his way to leave the office, already looking forward to the weekend. Even though the 'chase' of Kira never ended, it was always a relief to be alone, at home. No one who could bother him.

Those plans were quickly ruined as his cell phone went off just as he was walking through the lobby towards the doors. With an annoyed sigh, he reached into his coat pocket and pulled the device up, flipping it open and held it to his ear. "This is Yagami Raito-…" He paused immediately as Matsuda's voice, with something akin to anxiety, hurriedly started speaking.

"_I-I hope you aren't headed home yet!"_

"And why is that?" He kept his voice monotonous, not wanting to deal with whatever Matsuda now had found out. But he would be proved wrong.

"_Because the woman that Kira killed earlier today… she-… She has reawakened!_"

… He stared blankly at the wall; all thoughts of wanting to go home suddenly vanished. "…Reawakened?" He echoed; an obvious trace of shock in his tone.

"_Yes! When she was brought to the hospital, she was most certainly dead, but then, just half an hour ago, she suddenly started breathing again!_"

"What are you talking about!?" He asked. "Which hospital!?" He was sure he hadn't misspelled the name, and she had done just as told before she died… so **how** could Tamaki Ayako have returned to the living?

"_Why is that important?"_

"I want to talk to her as quickly as possible! We need to know more about it."

"…" Matsuda paused for a moment, and he could hear the rustle of papers. "_They say here that we can't bring her in for questioning until Monday. So I suggest you wait until-"_

"Which hospital!?" He yelled, the lobby suddenly falling silent.

"…_To-oh academic hospital…"_ Matsuda replied, in a tiny voice. Snorting, he flipped the cell phone shut, and then strode out of the lobby, not even bothering to open his umbrella to stop the rain. Heading for his car, he quickly unlocked it and opened the driver's door, sitting down and starting the engine.

As he drove out of the parking lot, he glared up in the rear-view mirror. "Ryuk! What the hell was that about!?"

"Dunno. Don't ask me." The shinigami shrugged.

"She **was** killed by the Death Note. So **how** could she reawaken!?"

"I've never heard of something like that happening… so it shouldn't be possible." Ryuk hummed. "The rules state that it can't be undone… maybe it was some other force?"

"Are you kidding me?" Raito growled, stopping for a red light as he glanced over his shoulder at the god of death. "Does there exist a power that can undo the Death Note?"

"Wouldn't know."

"But it's possible?"

"Maybe."

"…" He snarled angrily before shaking his head, driving from the intersection and then turning left at the next, heading towards To-oh academic hospital.

** DeathNote **

"Do you have any idea what you did at approximately eleven AM on Friday the thirteenth?" He asked the woman, who was staring quite blankly at him. The hospital personnel had told him to not meet with the woman, but he had convinced them otherwise by showing his identification and explaining the situation.

"…No." She shook her head, and he sighed. She had **no** memory at all of her criminal deed only ten hours ago. To be more accurate – she remembered nothing at all of her life. Except her name, age, and basic knowledge that every single person could learn in school – except for that, everything was gone. Everything.

Not to mention the fact that she had woken up after being dead for three hours. This didn't make sense at all. Though, he should be used by it by now – after all, writing people's names in a notebook and thereby making them die isn't precisely your daily piece of cake.

"Excuse me officer, but why are you asking me these questions?" He looked up at the woman again, eyes slightly narrowed.

"Because, Tamaki Ayako, you just recently woke up after being proclaimed dead for three hours."

"That cannot be." She even smiled. "I'm still young, why would I have died?"

"Because Kira killed you."

"**The** Kira?" So apparently some memory of daily life was left. She knew which year it was, some simple historical happenings during the last year, and Kira. "Why would he have done such a thing?"

"Because you killed your friend."

"Do I have a friend?" This was driving him nuts. This woman was nuts! This wasn't making any sense at all! How in the name of whatever was holy was he supposed to understand where the Death Note had failed if this insolent woman couldn't answer his questions! Something was definitively fishy about this whole ordeal – and Ryuk wasn't helping his temper either, as the shinigami was laughing heartily in the background.

"Okay… so you don't remember getting killed?"

"…No." She shook her head. "Though I do remember collapsing… and I do remember somebody telling me to wake up."

"Telling you to wake up?" That couldn't be right. She was supposed to be dead, and was just waiting for the autopsy… so… "Can you memorize exactly what was said?"

"…Well… it was a very soothing voice…" She mumbled, frowning softly. "And it was as if a warm feeling spread throughout my body… and then I woke up."

"…But what did that voice tell you?"

"…" She frowned again, looking at the wall. Then her expression went blank again. He sighed; this wasn't going to lead him anywhere.

He stood up with a shake of his head, lifting his briefcase up and pulling his coat on again. It was already half past nine, and he really ought to get home now. He went for the door and reached for the doorknob, when her voice was raised again, halting him immediately.

"_Once is once – but everyone gains a second chance._"

** DeathNote **

"Once is once… huh." He snorted softly, driving out into the pouring rain again. Somehow that sentence had a familiar tone to it… something he just… couldn't place… "Once is once… but everyone gains a second chance…" It was eerie. Somehow…

"Seems to me like she was contacted by another dead soul or something…" Ryuk mentioned lazily.

"How could that be possible? And how could that 'dead soul' bring her back to life? It just doesn't make sense!"

"Try killing her again?"

He growled. "No. Not until I've gotten some sort of information on all of this. I don't want to let this slip, Ryuk. It's impossible. I want to get to the bottom with **why** someone **I** killed with the Death Note suddenly awakens again! I've been using it for seven years. It shouldn't be possible!"

"…" Ryuk shrugged, and returned to looking out the window. Or maybe staring off into space. Whatever it was, it didn't matter to him, as he kept driving. It would be at least a ten-minute drive home to his residence, so he could as well take this time to think.

So… what did he have? A woman, age 24. She murdered her friend, and he killed her. So far so good. The heart-attack ended her life – and she was declared dead. Then, three hours later, she wakes up at To-oh academic hospital, without memories and that cryptic sentence.

Once is once – but everyone gains a second chance. No matter how you looked at it, it was strange. And awfully familiar. In fact, it was so familiar he couldn't remember wherefrom it was familiar.

He must've gotten paranoid. There was probably a reasonable excuse. Let's just exclude the Death Note for now. She got a heart attack, her body went into suspended animation, and she reawakens three hours later. Whatever she heard or felt during that time should've been a dream, theoretically.

Not a bad thesis, is it? Though there **was** something wrong with it. For now he **had** used the Death Note, and she **should've** died. Yet… why didn't she? Okay… Now was the time to calm down… not to do anything hasty. Calm yourself, Raito. This was… just a small complication – is all. Just a small complication – nothing to worry about.

And it was Friday the thirteenth.

The rain was still coming down in heavy drops as he arrived at his dark residence. Since he lived alone, no one was home when he returned, and no lamps were turned on. It was a rather sad sight for the normal human being. But it was his own private place, so it looked as welcoming as anything could at times like these. At least he knew that he'd be able to think things over in peace here. He stepped out of the car, still without shielding himself from the rain with the umbrella, and locked the car, before heading up the small pathway to the house. Yeah, a cup of coffee and some time to think would definitively be in place…

Or maybe not.

He stopped, eyes widening slightly. On the small veranda, seated on the settee he hadn't used since end July; was a figure veiled in the dark of the shadows and the night. He blinked a couple of times, before his eyes got used to the dark slightly.

First thing that his him was the utterly familiar feeling he got. Even though the person in fact had a hooded sweatshirt on, shielding his face, there was this feeling that… He frowned and walked up the steps, the figure not moving an inch.

And… that way of sitting… he knew someone who had nagged him for ages with that… Biting his lip, he put his briefcase down and walked over, the wood of the veranda creaking slightly. Still no movement. He came to a halt in front of the person. "Hey." He tried, slowly. The only thing that showed that this person was awake and listening was the slight nod of the head, how faint it now might be.

Narrowing his eyes, he kneeled down a little, in order to see the person's face. Even though half of their face was veiled, one dark eye focused on his, in a slightly piercing glare that sent a sudden chill up his spine, another twinge of familiarity hitting him.

Shakily, he reached one hand out, determined to just see if his feared suspicion was right. The person didn't flinch, nor did he break their still connected gaze, as he grabbed the material of the sweatshirt loosely, before pulling the hood back.

The same second that short and messy raven black hair was revealed, he widened his eyes, the mixed feelings of anxiousness and fear came crashing down with the familiarity, and he staggered one step backwards. Those deep, black eyes, which were impossible to read, and had always been, looked calmly back at him. He took a shaky breath, voicing himself to confirm his own sudden realization.

"…L…"

**And that's the first chapter! I hope this chapter wasn't too boring, and that you found it worthwhile! Hopefully there will be a little more happenings in the next chapter. I like this chapter as a beginning, but I'm sure I can do things better in the next one!**

**Until next time then, my dears! And please, don't forget to review!**

**/Keyhala**


	2. Chapter 2

**Warning:** **Both disclaimer and story include spoilers up to and including volume 7! After that, not even I know what happens, but if you haven't read volume 7, and don't want to know major spoilers – do NOT read. If you don't mind spoilers or have already read, then please go ahead **

**Okay! Chapter 2! I put this up now in return for all the wonderful reviews I'm so happy for them! And PLEASE keep it up It makes an authoress happy **

**Disclaimer:** **I do not own Death Note or any of its Characters. If I did, L would never have died and There would've been a lot more yaoi laugh**

**Summary:** **In the year 2010, Kira's will has almost become the law. Raito has no more competition as the chief inspector of the NPA. Even if the role of 'L' was relinquished a year earlier, at the same time as Near and Mello got wiped from history, he has no problem, since he holds the entire police force of Japan, as well as well as the role of the worlds 'saviour', Kira. There are slight complications with the now upcoming discussions about disbanding the police, but he doesn't see it as a long-term problem.**

**Everything seems to be going fine, up until Friday the thirteenth of August, when something pretty unpredictable happens. One of the newly dead criminals, who got killed by Kira's judgement, suddenly reawakens on the hospital, three hours after her death. Shocked at this information, Raito decides to get information from the woman. But she has no memories of her life whatsoever, only her name, age and a cryptic phrase; "_Once is once – but everyone gains a second chance." _**

**Deciding to go home to think the entire situation over, he finds another shocking surprise waiting. For if a woman who has been dead can reawaken… then why couldn't also someone else?**

**Warnings:** **Yaoi (malexmale), Violence, Language**

**Well, with that in mind, why don't we get started? And my dears, please don't forget to review It would make a poor authoresses' day if you could take the time to write a decent review! Tell me what you think **

Chapter 2

There was a tense silence at first. Neither looked away, and neither said a word. Raito couldn't believe it. He couldn't believe what his eyes showed him. Then again, such a thing was only natural. Because who would believe his or her eyes when someone who has been dead for four years suddenly appears on your veranda, looking as alive and kicking as ever?

In this short, yet drawn-out, silence that had occurred, he started taking notice of several things. For starters, the entire fact that the detective was alive. It just didn't fit in at all in anything that had happened. Secondly, despite being completely drenched by the cold autumn rain, L didn't seem to be cold at all – quite the contrary. Funny, as he himself found his hand shaking. That could, though, be both because of the cold and the strange sensation of fear he had felt.

Because there was one important thing that **could** be bad for him. After all, L **knew** that he was Kira.

So how was he supposed to approach this?

Ryuk was chuckling in the background, as he often did when Raito was in a moment of trouble. After all, the shinigami's only 'purpose' in being in the human world was that he wanted to be amused. So there was nothing uncommon by the strange sound emerging from the god of death as he watched the scene.

Swallowing once, afraid of the silence for almost the first time in his life, and also not wanting to seem too insecure, he finally found his voice again. "L… you're-"

"Alive?" Still so softly spoken, in a calm manner showing that he was calculating every single word he was saying, and also calculating hundreds of possible answers. Also, those eyes were still as straightforward as they had been for the entire time he had known the detective. "Correct. And as a quite demanding side-note, Raito-kun, I do appreciate if you'd call me Ryuzaki still. Even in an area like this, the wrong name could create a lot of commotion."

He was startled. Even if he also used to calculate what could possibly come up in a conversation, this had certainly not been it. It could've been anything. An accusation, a threat – anything to show proof that the raven-haired male was seeking some sort of vengeance for the past – but certainly not a request to call him by his old alias, in order to not draw attention to him. But the logic was understandable. Even in the outskirts of Tokyo, a sudden rumour that L had been mentioned could spread like a wildfire until the whole world knew, and he certainly wouldn't want that.

"Raito-kun." He blinked, cursing himself mentally for having spaced out as he met piercing black eyes again, as Ryuzaki tilted his head. "Aren't you cold?" Was this guy for real? "It's below ten degrees, and you're soaked." He almost wanted to hit his own forehead. Ryuzaki sure hadn't changed…

"Aren't **you** cold?" He countered. Since the other was as soaked as him – if not more – it wouldn't have been a surprise if he was.

"After waiting for two hours, your body grows quite accustomed to the low temperature." This was insane! Why in the world would he have waited there, in the pouring rain, for two hours!? It certainly couldn't be to just show his appearance again. And since it didn't seem he was going to turn him over to the police, he could probably exclude that thesis too. Probably. That would show, though.

And once again – **how** could he **possibly** be alive!? He had seen the man die, for the love of whatever was holy! "…"

"Judging by your expression, Raito-kun, I will be so bold as to assume that my visit has taken you by surprise." Despite himself, he couldn't hold in a short, bitter laugh. Taken him by surprise!? No kidding!

"Well, it's not everyday you see the dead return alive."

"True." A small nod. What the hell? Was he really here just to annoy him? Or was he waiting for him to misstep and give something away? Maybe he really was back to finish his work. To show proof of whom Kira was. "I know what's going through your mind right now, Raito-kun." He blinked. "But please think rationally. To everyone except you and me, I **am **dead."

He narrowed his eyes slightly. It was true, of course. Even if only a few selected people knew what L looked like, the detective was known to be dead. The entire world knew of it.

So with that in mind, it would be impossible for Ryuzaki to just go to the police. First of all, he wouldn't have any evidence, and no authority to underlie his accusation. Second of all, since Kira was being seen as righteous, any attempt to try and oppose him would be futile. At least if he'd turn his accusation towards the authorities or the government. There was the chance that he could be working with a group against Kira, but that was highly unlikely.

And lastly, if he would scramble together some evidence, it was most likely that he would still be dismissed, or locked in because of trying to overthrow Kira. Also, an accusation against Yagami Raito, the chief inspector of the NPA, was also not a very wise choice to try and do.

In that aspect, that wouldn't be the reason for the detective's sudden appearance, either. "So… then what is the reason for your visit?" He was finally starting to think again. And calm down. Okay. So L was supposed to be dead, but by some reason he wasn't. That could always be worked out. Because there has to be some reason, logical or not. And even if he was now alive again, he had no position to threaten him, so in that sense, there was nothing to be afraid of. Yet.

"Who knows?" Gee, cryptic much? For the first time since the conversation started, Ryuzaki had broken their eye contact, and was now gazing out over the drenched scenery, teeth nipping at his thumb – another eccentric habit of his that had driven Raito to the edge of sanity - and narrowing his eyes slightly, in thought. "I would say I merely wanted to see where these four years have taken you, Raito-kun." Black eyes broke away from the scenery to lock with his own, brown, ones. "You seem to have done well."

"At least better than you, I'd say." He mentioned, a slightly sarcastic tone to his voice. His calm exterior faltered slightly as that statement was met with a small laugh, accompanied by the tiniest of smiles. During his entire relation with the man, he had never once heard him laugh. And his smiles where just as rare. Maybe that was because the only time he had been accompanying the detective had been during the calculating and analysing of the Kira-case, where an almost constant look of concentration and thought was on his face? Or maybe he had just never mentioned it before.

"I wouldn't say that so carefreely." The detective stopped nipping his thumb for a moment. "Even if **you** might never get to see it, heaven can be quite a relaxing place to live." Was he mocking him now? Or did the detective know that his use of the Death Note would make sure he never came to heaven or hell? That would be impossible… "Despite it being relaxing, there are far too few good cases up there for a detective to entertain himself."

"Since we get on the subject," he said, with a slightly agitated tone, "how did you return?" The straightforward look those black eyes gave him was annoying him to no end, and he guessed that Ryuzaki knew of it, despite the fact that Raito was a good actor. Even a good actor could get an annoyed look on his face.

Whether Ryuzaki knew of his annoyance or not, he looked up, not minding the heavy raindrops the least. "I do think we should get inside. With this temperature, there is a high percentage risk that one of us catches a cold." That didn't answer his question, and any other person would've been annoyed, but he actually agreed. Even if the talk about catching a cold was a disguise for the detective's dislike to speak about it outside, it was a good way of moving the conversation to a safer spot.

After all, they had already earlier agreed that even in a silent neighbourhood, the wrong person getting the wrong information could be severe.

"That's true." He nodded, walking past the other. He could hear the wet wood creak slightly under his feet, but also the settee as the other male stood up. Picking up his briefcase, he fished out his keys and unlocked the door.

Opening it, and at the same time turning on the lights inside the room, he looked back at the other. "Come on in."

** DeathNote **

After he had hung off his coat and advised the other to the living room for the time being, he went to change. He did like to wear something more comfortable at home, and the clothes he had on now were soaked.

He hung up the clothes in order to allow them to dry; he picked out a pair of slacks and a simple white T-shirt, pulling them on. After that he left the room, picking out a towel from the bathroom to dry his hair.

Re-entering the living room, he noticed that the raven-haired detective was standing by a bureau, looking at the several photos he had. Black eyes looked up at him as he made his presence known. "If you want, you can get a change of clothes."

"No, I'll be fine…"

"Don't be ridiculous." He snorted. "You're soaked. Besides, you'll be soaking my furniture too." He used that last as a weight, in order to make the other comply. He didn't want to have his conscience kicking in. He didn't have much of a conscience when it came to people, but sometimes – often at quite annoying ones, too – it would kick in.

"If you insist…"

"Which I do." He motioned to the other and re-entered his room, picking out another change of clothes, before in politeness leaving the other alone as he went to the bathroom to pick out another towel.

As Ryuzaki joined him in the living room again, he threw the towel at him. The detective seemed surprised, but caught it in midair. "Use it to dry your hair."

"…" Without complaining, the other did as told, as Raito motioned for him to sit down, while he himself sat down in the sofa, stretching a little. He eyed the detective as Ryuzaki placed the towel on the armrest and then pulled both feet up on the seat, hands on his knees. It was such a trademark for him. Raito almost smiled, even if it was slightly bitter. How many times hadn't he wondered about it? And yet, the only answer he had gotten was of that cryptic kind. Percentages had always been Ryuzaki's way of persuading people to understand his ways.

"Well then…" Black eyes fixed on his again. "Now that we're away from possible listening ears…" A small flicker was seen in the other's eyes, as if the detective was pleased that he had managed to understand the true meaning of his cryptic sentence before. "…Why did you… or rather – **how** did you return."

"You're just as you've always been, Raito-kun." Ryuzaki said, thumb back between his teeth as he thought over his answer. "Obviously, as you might have calculated, I was revived. Reawakened. I'm sure the thought must have crossed your mind that I'm the same as Tamaki Ayako… you **have** heard about her revival, have you not?"

"I met her." He admitted, narrowing his eyes in annoyance. That was true, there was that matter still… but Ryuzaki was right, he had considered the two cases being alike. **But** there was one big difference between them that had made him dismiss the thought. So why was Ryuzaki making references to that woman at this time? "But hang on a second here, Ryuzaki." The other travelled between two faces, first obvious satisfactory that he had chosen to call him by the name the detective had asked him to, to patience while waiting for what he had to say. "Why are you bringing that woman up? You're not the same."

"You're clever, Raito-kun. But we knew that already, didn't we?" Ryuzaki hummed. "Though I don't think there is any mistake in this. You're incorrect. Tamaki-san and I **are** the same. We were both killed by Kira, and we were both brought back to life."

"…" The reasoning wasn't wrong, but he couldn't help but notice that Ryuzaki had excluded two vital things from his description. One, the fact that Tamaki Ayako had no memories whatsoever, while Ryuzaki undoubtedly had, and the second is… "Don't slither away. There are vital differences."

"Which are…?"

"For one, you have all your memories remaining, while Tamaki Ayako has none. Secondly, you died four years ago, whereas that woman died today. There has to be differences."

"Of course there are differences." Another small smile made the detective's lip quirk slightly.

"…" Raito narrowed his eyes, waiting patiently. Was it really that easy to get information? Or would it all be cryptic, yet again?

"For example," Ryuzaki shrugged softly, "I'm not female."

"Stop messing around!" He growled. Now he knew the other was making fun of him. "That is **not** what I meant, and you know it! Why do you relate yourself to Tamaki Ayako? I understand that the basic principle is the same, but there are too many vital differences for them to be the exactly the same. The details are not relatable at all."

"…"

"First of all," he said, holding up one finger, "you have your memories, she doesn't. Secondly," another finger, "the time difference. And in **addition** to the problem with the time difference..."

He held up a third finger, "is the fact that it doesn't sum up. I can relate to the fact that a person who hasn't crossed over to the other side may reawaken, as would be in Tamaki Ayako's case. But you, Ryuzaki, have been dead for **four** years. Her spirit was reawakened in her own body, but you were buried those four years ago, so that theory doesn't fit in."

"…" Ryuzaki was biting at his thumb again, contemplating his current predicament with a soft hum. "To be straightforward, this isn't my original body." As Raito blinked, the raven-haired detective retracted his hand from his mouth to look at it, a thoughtful frown crossing his face.

"…not yours?"

"Correct. But…" He shrugged and returned to biting his thumb. "…It has the same genetic structure, so it **is** my body. If you'd dig up my grave, though, my original one would be there, by this time heavily decomposed."

Raito narrowed his eyes slightly. This was getting more annoying by the second. "So… in that case… what is this body you have now?"

"It was created… approximately two weeks ago – if you believe Jyiva."

"…Jyiva?" What the hell? Now it was getting even more confusing. Ryuk had stopped chuckling a while ago, and a small glance to his right showed that the shinigami was looking as startled as he felt. Any other time that would be amusing… but now…

Wait. Put two and two together… "Was Jyiva the one who brought you back to life?"

"Correct." Ryuzaki nodded. "You certainly haven't lost your analytic gift, Raito-kun."

"…Then… is he the one who brought Tamaki Ayako back to life, too?"

"Incorrect." Ryuzaki looked straight at him. "You stated it yourself. Me and Tamaki Ayako aren't the same in this case. Which I thought would lead you to the conclusion that Jyiva had nothing to do with her." The detective made a small motion with his hand.

"The one who brought back Tamaki-san from the dead wasn't Jyiva. It was me."

There was another ugly silence. He stared at the man before him, with everything suddenly thrown into a new light, and was only met by a patient look. **Ryuzaki** had brought Tamaki Ayako back from the dead!? How was it possible? That didn't fit in with logic at all? "…You?"

"Correct." Another nod. "I had assumed you would have figured it out with the evidence I gave you, but apparently you hadn't. But that is alright. Maybe now you have at least figured out the reason for my visit, Raito-kun." Black eyes studied him, waiting for a response.

If Ryuzaki had been the one to revive Ayako Tamaki… then he could surely revive others. But not any others… "You are going to continue reviving the criminals Kira passes judgement on?"

"Correct." Which made it all clear. Even if Ryuzaki wasn't able to go to the police, that was certainly a way to oppose Kira, too. "By the way, Raito-kun, may I ask a question now?"

"…Go ahead." What the-?

"I did have the thought that Misa-san was living with you…"

"She's dead." He said, bluntly. "And I didn't kill her. She ran out of time."

"…Oh so that's how it is…" Ryuzaki hummed. "So Jyiva was right. A human who has used the Death Note doesn't even get tested. They never go to either heaven or hell… I wonder where they end up…"

"Don't travel off the original topic now." He said, firmly. He still had questions to ask. There were too many question marks here to be ignored. "Just why do you have your memories while Tamaki Ayako hasn't? And who on earth is Jyiva!?"

"…" Jet black eyes regarded him for a second before the detective spoke up. "There wouldn't be a chance to ask for some coffee? I feel rather out of energy."

He gritted his teeth. Obviously the man needed time to think out his answers. And he also suspected that he wouldn't get any answers unless he complied, he suspected. "Very well, just stay put for a while…" He rose up, walking past the other on the way to the kitchen, hoping he was only imagining the other looking after him.

He started the cooker while picking out two cups from the cupboard, sighing softly. This was becoming a real pain. But he was actually glad that the detective had requested coffee, for he sure needed some himself. He put the two cups on a tray and thought for a split second. Then he sighed, and took down the sugar bowl, making sure there were enough sugar cubes for the other male. Knowing him, at least six were needed.

He frowned in distaste. That much sugar could **never** be healthy. He was firm on that thought. No matter how much Ryuzaki had tried to tell him that it helped to keep his energy up enough for him to think properly. Despite the detective using a lot of examples and percentages to underlie his thesis, Raito wasn't sure he would believe it. But he had never tried to convince the detective to stop devouring that amount of sugar – he knew better than that.

Pouring up coffee in the two cups and placing the sugar bowl between them, he frowned. Why did he sense something would be wrong… wait… knowing Ryuzaki… he sighed again. Why did he know so much about the detective, yet so little? He frowned before walking over to another cupboard and opening it. Yep, just as he thought.

His mother was concerned about him never coming home, but she hadn't been complaining. But every now and then she'd send him something to the office, and every time, it was placed in the cupboard until it was too old, and then tossed away. This apple cake was received the day before, so it wouldn't be a problem, unless Ryuzaki felt particularly picky.

He took out a knife and cut the cake into eight pieces, picking out a fork and a plate, and then lifted the tray with both hands and returned to the living room. He could hear Ryuk eating an apple from the fruits basket behind him as he left. He shook his head, knowing that the shinigami would follow him back out eventually.

As he set the tray down on the coffee table, he could see something flicker in the other's eyes, jet black pools fixing on the cake. "It was the only thing I had home, so I hope it'll be enough."

Ryuzaki looked back up at him. "You don't seem to have forgotten about my habits." A small smile accompanied the words. "Thank you, Raito-kun."

"Hn." He shrugged and sat down again, he lifted his cup and took a sip, frowning in slight distaste as the detective put a total of nine sugar cubes in his coffee. Yuck. He would never be able to drink coffee with that much sugar…

As the other took a sip, he set his cup down, daintily, and watched the other inquiringly. Ryuzaki didn't mention his look as he took one piece of the cake onto the plate, lifting it up and taking a bite. "As for your question," he only blinked, masking his surprise well. How was it that they thought to alike? Why could Ryuzaki always know what he was thinking –and answer before he got the time to ask? It was almost scary. Almost. But it always startled him when Ryuzaki knew that sort of things. As he had now. How had he known that Raito had been on the verge of repeating the question? "I believe that it would be a lot easier to explain if you met Jyiva personally."

"And why is that?" He asked, taking another sip, slightly tense.

"Because the entire difficulty in answering your question lies in the fact that explaining Jyiva is difficult without you meeting him." Ryuzaki took another bite of the cake. "This one's good. Is it your mother who has made it?"

"Don't switch topic." He muttered. "But yeah, she made it."

"You should compliment her…" He mumbled, before taking another bite.

"Maybe so… but back to topic." That was the fourth time … no, fifth… that they'd trailed away from the original topic… "So where can I meet Jyiva?"

"It's not that easy to meet him."

"Then why don't you just tell me?"

"Because your understanding will be forty percent higher if you meet him."

"…" He growled. "Then I should meet him."

"You're determined?"

"Yes…" He trailed off slightly as the other set the cake down, rising up. Something was wrong with the situation, he could tell, as he watched the other round the coffee table. "…So where would we be able to meet him?"

"It isn't that hard, though there are complications." Ryuzaki said, patiently. "But I always have an easier time showing than explaining by words, Raito-kun."

"Yes… I know that." He said, with a nervous tone to his voice. Sure, he was curious to know who had the power to oppose the Death Note, but something about this entire development was making him nervous. It almost made him wish he hadn't asked.

And for once, Ryuk wasn't laughing at his dismay. As he looked over, he also noticed that the shinigami seemed tense. Question was if Ryuk's tension was a good or a bad thing.

As a movement in the corner of his eyes made him look back, he started to suspect even more that it **was** a bad thing. With a rather uncharacteristic yelp, he pushed back against the back of the sofa, staring with wide eyes at the other male, whose face was approximately two inches away from his own.

"A-Wha-wha-wha-?" He managed to stutter, and he must've sounded utterly ridiculous, but that wasn't his fear at the moment. He still tried to inch backwards, even though it was humanly impossible.

"I must forewarn you." Ryuzaki said, slowly, not looking away or seeming disturbed at all. Just patient. Patient in that way that had always annoyed him.

"Forewarn me?" He echoed.

"Correct." Was it just his imagination, or had those two inches shrunk to one? "This might hurt… **_Kira_**."

And before he had any chance to protest or react against the other calling him that name, lips settled over his own only a millisecond before a razor-sharp pain cut through his mind and his vision went blank.

**And THAT is chapter 2! And oh dear… it's another cliffhanger! GOMENE! Anyway! Next chapter will be pretty interesting I say… but in any case, this story won't be moving forward very fast in the beginning, but I hope you don't mind ; I'm just that kind of person. Anyway!** **Keep up the reviews **

**Until** **next time, then!**

**/Keyhala**


	3. Chapter 3

**Warning:** **Both disclaimer and story include spoilers up to and including volume 7! After that, not even I know what happens, but if you haven't read volume 7, and don't want to know major spoilers – do NOT read. If you don't mind spoilers or have already read, then please go ahead **

**AND here's chapter 3 Hope I didn't leave you waiting too long ;;; I'll try to update quicker next time! Okay! This chapter has insert drum roll spoilers to L's REAL NAME – as it is stated in Volume 13 – How to read Death Note. Just for your information!**

**Disclaimer:** **I do not own Death Note or any of its Characters. If I did, L would never have died and There would've been a lot more yaoi laugh**

**Summary:** **In the year 2010, Kira's will has almost become the law. Raito has no more competition as the chief inspector of the NPA. Even if the role of 'L' was relinquished a year earlier, at the same time as Near and Mello got wiped from history, he has no problem, since he holds the entire police force of Japan, as well as well as the role of the worlds 'saviour', Kira. There are slight complications with the now upcoming discussions about disbanding the police, but he doesn't see it as a long-term problem.**

**Everything seems to be going fine, up until Friday the thirteenth of August, when something pretty unpredictable happens. One of the newly dead criminals, who got killed by Kira's judgement, suddenly reawakens on the hospital, three hours after her death. Shocked at this information, Raito decides to get information from the woman. But she has no memories of her life whatsoever, only her name, age and a cryptic phrase; "_Once is once – but everyone gains a second chance." _**

**Deciding to go home to think the entire situation over, he finds another shocking surprise waiting. For if a woman who has been dead can reawaken… then why couldn't also someone else?**

**Warnings:** **Yaoi (malexmale), Violence, Language**

**Well, with that in mind, why don't we get started? And my dears, please don't forget to review It would make a poor authoresses' day if you could take the time to write a decent review! Tell me what you think **

Chapter 3

He knew he couldn't have blacked out for long, but he also knew that when asleep or out cold, your awareness of time and your surroundings shrink to about 0.1. So he was probably wrong.

At any rate, there was something wrong with the situation. First of all, he was **pretty** sure he'd been sitting up; now he was lying down. Secondly, angry voices arguing made him frown in confusion. Thinking back, it had only been him and Ryuzaki-

Jerking awake, he sat up quickly – too quickly. As it blackened for his eyes again in a second of dizziness, he gripped his forehead, his surroundings silencing. Blinking a couple of times, he groaned painfully, cursing himself under his breath for such a reckless move, as a dull aching was found present in the back of his head. "Brilliant. I was contemplating on waking him, but you seem to have solved it without my help." Ryuzaki's voice cut through his haze, and he blinked again, looking up.

Ryuzaki was watching him patiently, having returned to his original seat. Taking notice that the detective had started on his third piece of cake, he then looked over to Ryuk, who had been watching Ryuzaki with a quite annoyed look, but now turned to lock eyes with him. He frowned shortly. Something was definitely skewed here.

Even though he was still dazed from his sudden awakening, and the fact that the dull pain in the back of his head was disturbing him, he was sure of **two** things. One – judging by the scene, Ryuzaki had been telling Ryuk off – which shouldn't be possible, and two – that someone else had joined them.

For the first time looking at the fourth being in the room, his eyes widened slightly. Without any doubt, this had to be Jyiva.

Blank silver eyes regarded him silently as the being stood silent, having lost the frown on his face after looking away from Ryuk. Just as the shinigami, this being was taller than most average humans. Possible somewhere near seven feet. Six point eight, he then decided. Despite being almost as tall as Ryuk, the resemblances ended there. In the name of whatever was holy – they were opposites.

Whereas Ryuk was clad in black, Jyiva wore white – or was it silver? At any rate, it was bright. Just as his hair, that was braided down to his mid-back, and shifted in colour from between silver – past different shades of blonde – up to gold. Also, he noted with a slight bitter afterthought, this being was a lot more pleasant to regard than the shinigami.

But what **was** he? He didn't look away, finally taking notice in one last thing. Down the beings back, resembling the black wings Ryuk used to fly, Jyiva had a matched pair of white ones.

Would he like to take a wild guess? "Ryuzaki…"

"Mhm?" The detective hummed in question, busy devouring the third piece of cake, a calm expression on his face.

"Jyiva… he's not from this world either – is he?"

"Correct." He looked away from the being, seeing Ryuk scowl at it, and then to the detective. The pain in the back of his head wouldn't stop, and he wanted to question it, but first of all…

"May I assume that he has some alikeness to Ryuk?"

"Your shinigami?" Ryuzaki looked over to Ryuk. "He never told me his name, how rude." Then he glanced back at him, taking in his startled appearance. "And to answer your question – you're correct – yet incorrect. He holds resemblances to the shinigami, but he's not of their kind."

"Then what is he – and how can you see Ryuk?" He didn't even bother to keep a calm look, so many questions now having surfaced. Jyiva was watching Ryuk calmly, in the same manner as Ryuzaki was watching him, and it was slightly disturbing.

"One question at a time, please, Raito-kun." Ryuzaki took another piece of the cake, now starting his fourth. "First of all, Jyiva is a tenshi."

"An angel?"

"Correct." Black eyes watched his reaction. "You seem to have lost some of your logic in your hasty awakening, Raito-kun. After all, I hinted about me residing in heaven for these four years – yet you couldn't try and comprehend the connection?"

"…I didn't think of it." He muttered, trying to calm down a little, though unnerved by Ryuk's continued tenseness. "On to my other question. How come you suddenly can see Ryuk?"

"Evaluating my past thesis about the shinigami and figuring that you would always carry around the one connected to Ryuk, even if the other one was-"

"You looked through my briefcase!?" He exclaimed, startled. He shouldn't have been so surprised, actually, but it **did** startle him. Even though he had past experience of the detective using unorthodox methods and also intruding on the personal, he honestly hadn't expected something like that.

"I would say it's correct to assume that." Ryuzaki took a sip from his coffee. Then he held up the black notebook for Raito to see, leaning over to place it on the table. "Further than that, I haven't done anything with it. Ask your shinigami. He knows I didn't."

"…But why would you want to see Ryuk?"

"Just a sense of a fair trade." The detective said, simply, returning to the cake. "I agreed on letting you see Jyiva – so I figured it would only be just for me to see your shinigami, too."

He couldn't completely disagree, yet, this had given the other a little more of an advantage. Even though it wasn't clear **when** it would be an advantage, it sure was- wait a second. Speaking of advantages…

He quickly skimmed his memory. Ryuzaki had said 'figuring that you would always carry around the one connected to Ryuk, even if the **other one** was'… he had only knowledge of two death notes. Which in turn gave him a sort of advantage. Nothing he could use right now, but it was enough if he kept it in mind.

At any rate, he still had questions. "So… you know you can see Ryuk by touching the Death Note." While he spoke, he leaned over to pick the notebook up, placing it on his side of the coffee table. "How is it that I suddenly got to see Jyiva?"

"Why are you interested in that fact?" Ryuzaki asked, twirling the contents of his cup languidly, for once not looking at him. Raito frowned. He honestly couldn't remember much. He remembered blacking out, and that sharp pain… and… wait – hang on a second…

"Because I think it's a fair trade." He then said, simply, using the detective's own words against him.

"True." Ryuzaki looked up again, studying his face. "The ability to see Jyiva goes under two rules. The first possibility is if you're dead." Well, that was excluded, at least. As long as his heart was beating, he couldn't be dead. "…Or…" The way the word was drawn out, it was obvious that Ryuzaki had noticed that he was thinking astray, and was trying to get his attention back.

"Or?" He questioned.

"Or by blood." He blinked. Blood? Wait – that coppery taste had been…

"So that was why you-…" He couldn't bring himself to say it, the memory itself causing him to feel uneasy. The fact that the other had kissed him before that pain had rushed through him was to him a little… how to say it… weird?

"That was why I what? Kissed you?" The straightforwardness in the words was… hurtful? No, that was not the word… startling was far more suited. The other had no problem saying a thing like that? "Correct. It seemed like the most convenient way at the moment. First of all, getting you to understand the concept of 'drinking' my blood might sound wrong, and secondly, I couldn't at that moment find a more convenient or by that means faster way to create an open wound than bite my lip."

"You could have done it by continuing gnawing your thumb, though." He retorted tauntingly, at which the detective blinked, taken of guard for a second before shrugging at him. "…Then… by devouring your blood, I can see him, right?"

"Correct."

"Because you are able to see him, it passed on through your blood, then?"

"Also correct."

"Then what was the pain?"

"I forewarned you that it might hurt." Forewarned him – Tsk. He had forewarned _Kira_. But he kept a straight face. "It's quite simple. Tenshi and shinigami are on the opposite sides of the scale. The darker and the lighter side – by no means pointing towards their righteousness." The last was added with afterthought, while the detective took a sip of his coffee.

"What would that have to do with anything?"

"Simple. Their powers oppose each other. The shinigami kill people, the tenshi save. Even though they haven't in a long while because of the increased rate of deaths – even before Kira's time."

"So if their powers oppose each other…" He took a moment to think. "Then would I being the owner of a Death Note have anything to do with it?"

"Correct." A nod. "As you already are in associations with the shinigami, the power from the other side of the scale – as well as the ability to see Jyiva – is painful. In the same way as first touching your Death Note now was for me."

"You got hurt by touching it?"

"Correct. Though it only happens once. So you won't have to worry about any more inconvenient fainting." Ouch, that stung. By the other's slightly amused tone, it had been a pun. "Did you have any more questions, or is it my turn to ask?"

"Huh?" Wait a second… He blinked. In his own eagerness of asking, he hadn't included the fact that Ryuzaki probably wanted some answers on his questions too. Equivalent trade. In that case he'd need to come up with some more questions… maybe he should try asking more about Jyiva-… He blinked around the room, not seeing either shinigami or tenshi anywhere. "Where-…"

"They probably moved their quarrel outside." Ryuzaki finished the fourth piece of cake. "As I had been saying, tenshi have almost completely stopped caring about the human world. Since there were too many inconvenient deaths, they stopped reviving those who died before their time – as the loss was greater than the gain. Instead, they agreed on making sure that as many as possible could repent for their sins at the gates and enter heaven."

"…" This did sound more and more like a supernatural drama. Though the fact that he had the Death Note wasn't really 'normal' either, this was just… too much at once. "…So the basic principle before they abandoned this world was that the shinigami killed humans for their amusement and to keep their lives – and tenshi revived those who were unjustly killed by this means?"

"Correct." A nod. "But now the shinigami had no one who opposed them, and they could continue to live on as they wanted. But the tenshi had it all right, as they made sure as many unjustly killed as possible could enter through the gates to heaven." He took another sip of coffee.

"Then what made the change?"

"Technically, Kira." He blinked, but patiently awaited the other's full response. "There were a lot of people killed by Kira, who didn't have had any chance to repent for their sins, neither in jail nor by swearing to repent for them, before they died. There was no chance for the tenshi to access heaven for those souls. Some of them did, though. For example, Naomi Misora was rather startled to see me there, at first." The detective hummed, and Raito thought back at the woman. He had only killed her because she was dangerous. She had figured out too much.

"But obviously she understood what had happened. Days, and eventually, years, passed. More people came, and more souls had to be dismissed because they hadn't been able to repent for their sins. The tenshi mourned it. Because even if they could choose to revive them, allow them to repent their sins, the loss would be too grave." Ryuzaki gave a soft sigh. "About three months after Mello and Near had arrived, Mello sadly enough having to be dismissed…" Black eyes closed for a moment, before the detective took another sip.

Raito frowned. As he understood for now… this didn't have a point yet… "What happened after those three months?"

"Jyiva spoke to me." The raven-haired male frowned. "I had never met him; I only knew he was of the high order. He asked me what I knew about this case. He had apparently spoken to Near first, but had gotten to know that I was the one originally involved in the case. I told him what I knew. Obviously. At first he had only nodded and left me. But he returned, another three months later. With the most ridiculous question." Another pause.

"What did he ask?"

"He asked me if I got the chance, would I kill Kira?" A small bitter look came upon the other's face. "I told him no. After all, that wouldn't make me any better than Kira, now would it? And once again, he left me. Even if I tried to calculate what he meant, I couldn't figure it out. I missed a vital piece."

"A vital piece?"

"The reason why he'd ask me if I'd kill Kira 'if I got the chance'; when it was impossible." Jet black eyes stayed focused on the contents of the man's cup, watching it swirl. "After all, the Death Note clearly stated that you can't even undo the death of a person once his or her name is written down in the note."

"True."

"It would be another five months before Jyiva returned, and I was still without answers. But I had an enjoyable time trying to think it out. Trying to find the final pieces of information to help me understand the concept and meaning of the angel's questions. It was both the feeling of an incredible failure, yet enthusiasm as I had something to really work on."

Ryuzaki lifted his gaze to him. "Even so, the feeling of hopelessness I felt when he returned was of the same kind as the moment I knew my name had been written down." Raito didn't feel guilty, just looked plainly at the other. Though he faintly did wonder how it felt – dying – knowing that you wouldn't open your eyes again, once you didn't have the strength to keep them open.

"At any rate, Jyiva returned." Once again, the detective was chewing on his thumb, not even paying attention to the cake anymore – which was a sure sign that Ryuzaki was deep in thought. "He said that he, too, had thought everything over. He ensured me that Kira was creating a huge mess, even for them. He said he had thought the easiest way would to just dispose of the culprit, and that had been why he had asked me. My own reaction to those words had been to ask him what he meant by that – what could I possibly accomplish against you when I was dead? That was when he told me the background story of the shinigami and the tenshi – how the rules **had** been, and what they had come to be. He explained the way they used to revive those unjustly killed. And laid out the proposition again – would I kill Kira if it meant regaining my life?"

"And you answered yes?" Raito asked, suddenly insecure.

"Incorrect. I declined, yet again. After all – I had already told him that such a thing wouldn't make me any better than Kira himself." Ryuzaki shook his head. "Jyiva called me stubborn and naïve. I told him I was just thinking logical. Killing is wrong, whether the person deserves it or not. Sending a person to execution is a way to make them repent for their sins and die – as they get the chance to do so before their execution. Then also – my opinion about executions is that they are meaningless and only a way to pass up the blame of killing the criminal on someone else."

"That is a way of thinking, yes." He nodded, leaning back in order to try and look relaxed, even though every muscle in his body was tense.

"After a while, he gave in to my reasoning, and laid out another sort of offer. He told me that if there was another way of stopping Kira, without killing him – would I do it?" There was a small pause, in which the detective took a sip of his coffee – which would most likely have been pretty cooled down now. "I accepted that offer. A week later, two weeks ago, he returned and told me the preparations were ready, and asked if I was willing to go. After all – he said – once you turn your back on heaven, there is no returning."

"And you agreed? Even if knowing that?"

"My highest goal was stopping Kira, and being dead was very boring." The raven-haired male shrugged. "So I did agree. After that, I don't remember anything – and Jyiva wouldn't tell me even if I asked. I awoke in a hotel room in Bristol, England." So there wouldn't be any way to gain information about the awakening process from the one being awakened; sounded reasonable. And even though it was a disappointment in itself, the fact that Ryuzaki skipped details which were most likely there made him a little annoyed, but he kept listening.

"Once there, I felt rather out of place. It was suddenly end July, 2010. I felt abandoned, as Jyiva was nowhere to be seen. Of course, that would have been because I was no longer dead. So I sat down and contemplated my situation for a while. At somewhere around midnight, it felt like my body froze." A frown settled upon the other's face, as Raito listened anxiously. "I felt a surge of dread, thinking that I was about to die _again_, but heard Jyiva's voice in my head. He explained to me, calmly, that it was a part of the rite. And he also said that receiving the tenshi reviving power wasn't a pleasant ritual. Sure enough, I blacked out. It was like everything in my brain had just – disconnected."

He almost smirked at the frown on the detectives face. But he couldn't help a small bitter thought. Why would the detective give up his only chance to stay in heaven just to capture him? Did he really hate him that much? Or was he just too full of pride to let Kira win? "In any case, I awoke again the next morning, and felt… I can't really explain it but – new. Jyiva was still there, and told me he'd be surveying my 'work'. The first thing I did was getting myself an alias, and making sure I booked a plane."

"Where did you get money?" It just didn't feel like it was right.

"I do still remember the account number to the bank case I had back those four years ago. It isn't owned by the detective L, but by me, as an own individual. I arrived in Tokyo on August the third. But then I wondered, what now? I hadn't really anything to do unless I found out some information – so I spent three days in a library, reading every single newspaper from the day I died and up."

"You… read every newspaper between November 2006 and August 2010!?" Raito widened his eyes. So much research – in three days?"

"More or less. Of course, I didn't completely read through all one-thousand four-hundred newspapers. I skimmed through them and collected the necessary information. Though I seem to have missed some things, like Misa-san's death."

"Well, it wasn't published in media since she retired two years ago. It was a very silent matter." He explained, carefully. "But in that case you know everything about the current investigation progress and my father's retirement? And also about the new proposition by the government to completely dispose of the entire police force?"

"Correct." The detective took a bite of the cake, the fifth piece now. "I also heard that you've stated your opinion about the police force still needed. It seems your taking your police job seriously, Raito-kun."

Was that a taunt? Or was it just a way to make him speak? "Anyway… So then, you just decided to show up here and answer my questions and tell me you will oppose Kira once again?"

"Basically, yes. Plus the fact that you are one of few people I can have a good conversation with, Raito-kun." Well, that was surely something unexpected. But he didn't say anything to complain against it. "Also, I have some questions for you as well."

"**You** have questions for me?" He asked, leaning back a little again. He faintly wondered where Ryuk had gone off too. Same for that tenshi – Jyiva.

"Indeed I have." Taking another bite of the cake, the other spoke up, making quite a comical sight with the fork still in his mouth. "First of all, why are you so determined to state that the police force should remain?"

"I am the chief inspector-"

"And also Kira."

"…That's a heavy accusation." He wasn't entirely sure he could leave the other with that, despite the other knowing he was indeed Kira.

"I'm one hundred percent sure, Raito-kun. In addition, you let it slip earlier, when stating that you hadn't killed Misa-san – you continued by saying that her time had run out. Anyone who didn't fear of being judged would have just said that she died. You added that you **hadn't** killed her, as if to cleanse your name. These years have made you careless. Also…" The detective even smiled faintly, taking another piece of the cake. "You wrote Tamaki Ayako's name in the Death Note while being in your office."

"I have no cameras installed there."

"Not you, no." Black eyes met his. "But I do. Since August the tenth. But don't worry, as said before, I can't exactly tell the police. Kira is, whether or not I like to admit it, the law in this world."

"And the criminal activities have dropped to single digits per month – worldwide." He said. "But fine, if you want your confession, I give it. I am Kira – and I framed Rem into killing you – in the same swipe killing her."

"You just answered two of my following questions." Ryuzaki said, tilting his head a little. "I was going to ask what happened to the shinigami, and whether or not you knew my true name. So, another question; how do you kill a shinigami?"

"By making it kill a human being for the sole purpose of expanding another human being's lifespan – meaning saving someone's life consciously..."

"Since shinigami are only created to kill, I presume." Ryuzaki hummed. "Fine. That was about all of my questions for now… except one."

"Except one?"

"Another thing I overheard from the recordings…" This didn't seem like something truly good… "I believe your words were that it was a **pity** to kill me? Correct?"

…He couldn't lie, as the other clearly had video recordings. "Correct. I enjoyed out word battles, and the way it forced me to think with all my logic. It was – entertaining."

"Certainly it was." Ryuzaki started the sixth piece of the cake – the man really was insane when it came to sweets. "Though I have to admit that even until the end, even if all possible evidence pointed towards it, I hoped you weren't Kira."

"How so?"

"I still saw you as a friend, Raito-kun." Black eyes travelled to the wall, and the detective nipped his thumb again. "I still do, even if I know we're still in this battle now. I did have that in mind when accepting the offer." He looked back at him, jet black pools locking with his brown ones efficiently. "I will try and end your killings without betraying you as a friend."

"Tsk. Sadly I can't say the same about you, 'Ryuzaki'." He snorted, sitting up straight. "I don't count someone I don't know the name of as a friend."

"That's a pity… but, oh, well. If you want my name, I can give it to you. After all, you can't kill me, even if you did. I can undo the effects of the Death Note." Raito narrowed his eyes, but only snorted softly.

"Fine, tell me your name." Ryuzaki smiled softly, taking another bite of the cake, drawing his free hand through messy raven hair.

"My name," he said, slowly, "has been in front of you during the entire battle." There was another small pause, in which Raito tried to contemplate what the detective could mean.

"My name **is** L. L Lawliet."

**AAAAAAAAAAND** **there we go Hope you all enjoy – and THANK YOU to all wonderful reviewers You all make me so damned happy **

**/Keyhala**


	4. Chapter 4

**Warning:** **Both disclaimer and story include spoilers up to and including volume 7! After that, not even I know what happens, but if you haven't read volume 7, and don't want to know major spoilers – do NOT read. If you don't mind spoilers or have already read, then please go ahead **

**WOOOOOOOOOOOW! Chapter 4! **

**Disclaimer:** **I do not own Death Note or any of its Characters. If I did, L would never have died and There would've been a lot more yaoi laugh**

**Summary:** **In the year 2010, Kira's will has almost become the law. Raito has no more competition as the chief inspector of the NPA. Even if the role of 'L' was relinquished a year earlier, at the same time as Near and Mello got wiped from history, he has no problem, since he holds the entire police force of Japan, as well as well as the role of the worlds 'saviour', Kira. There are slight complications with the now upcoming discussions about disbanding the police, but he doesn't see it as a long-term problem.**

**Everything seems to be going fine, up until Friday the thirteenth of August, when something pretty unpredictable happens. One of the newly dead criminals, who got killed by Kira's judgement, suddenly reawakens on the hospital, three hours after her death. Shocked at this information, Raito decides to get information from the woman. But she has no memories of her life whatsoever, only her name, age and a cryptic phrase; "_Once is once – but everyone gains a second chance." _**

**Deciding to go home to think the entire situation over, he finds another shocking surprise waiting. For if a woman who has been dead can reawaken… then why couldn't also someone else?**

**Warnings:** **Yaoi (malexmale), Violence, Language**

**Well, with that in mind, why don't we get started? And my dears, please don't forget to review It would make a poor authoresses' day if you could take the time to write a decent review! Tell me what you think **

Chapter 4

This – **had **– to be… some sort of cruel joke. It really had to be! What else would it be? Was Ryuzaki…L- …whatever – trying to tell him that the first piece of solving the puzzle he'd been busy with during their entire battle – had been in front of him all along? "…You can't be serious."

"I'm very serious." The detective said slowly. "Since I have no reason to fear giving you my name, why would I lie?"

"But… that can't be your name."

"It can, and it is, Raito-kun." The raven-haired male finished the piece of the cake, watching the last two indulgently. "Do you want some?"

"Huh?" he blinked, watching where the other's gaze was focused, and shook his head. The detective immediately reached out to get his seventh piece. "So… your name… really is L?"

"Sometimes, using your true name and pretending for it to be an alias can be the best defence." The man paused as he took a bite, thinking for a moment. "And even if you'd figure out that I was using my real name, my surname isn't that easy to find out, either. It's pretty secured."

"But who would give their child such a name?"

"A child can receive that sort of name when he or she **doesn't** have parents, Raito-kun. L Lawliet. Same first letter in name and surname. No one knew where I came from. Watari, as you know, had founded the orphanage. That's the place of my upbringing. There's where I received the name. But that's not a story to go into detail in at this time, Raito-kun."

Raito blinked. When he thought about it - that had to be the longest explanation of his past that Ryuzaki had ever brought forward. Was that supposed to be something he should be glad for, or not? Anyway… "At any rate… should I call you L now, then?"

"No. It's still too much of an important name to be spoken out loud. That was probably the only mistake with having it as my alias. After a while, you can't use it, even in private, anymore." A small shrug followed, as the detective looked up from the almost finished piece of cake to lock gazes with him. "So Ryuzaki will do fine."

"Well then, Ryuzaki. I still have to wonder about the reasons for telling me your name. You **could** have kept it a secret even so."

"I could – but I didn't." Ryuzaki said, calmly, still eating. "As I said, I count you as my friend, Raito-kun. And you told me you'd never be friends with someone you don't know the name of. The math is rather simple from there."

"…" What in the world? Did he mean that he only told him his name in order for him to gain some sort of chance becoming his **friend**? Even though the entire situation would make such a hope ridiculous, that was his aim? Or was there some other advantage that could be gained by giving away such information? He had to think. But he also knew that the longer he took to think, the more obvious his suspicion would be. Even if there might be a minimal chance, about four percent, that the detective's only motive was to gain some sort of chance to friendship, but the other ninety-six percent…

He suddenly blinked, realizing what **could** be a more likely reason for that slip of information. A **far** more likely reason, in fact. "I know where you're trying to get with this." The other's eyes held an emotion he wasn't used to seeing – surprise. Was he supposed to read that emotion in a particular way? Or was it just an act of surprise, in order to catch him off guard? He hesitated, if only a split second, before continuing. "By claiming to do this in order to allow yourself a chance at becoming something akin to my 'friend', you want to get me thoughtful, perhaps even 'considerate' in you eyes seen." He didn't get an answer, but the other was absent-mindedly picking at the cake, before taking another bite.

"You want to, in that way, manipulate my future actions. You want me to gradually 'realize' that my actions are 'wrong' and that _your_ way of seeing things is correct, and that I should stop passing judgment on criminals." He narrowed his eyes. "Furthermore, the entirety in you not wanting to kill me would then assure me that you wouldn't betray me as a 'friend' to go and tell the police as soon as Kira is no longer the law. In that sense you will have stopped me without killing me, and the only, simple, key would have been making me trust you as a friend. Guess what, Ryuzaki? You're a bit behind. I used the same tactic on you four years ago."

"I do remember that quite clearly." The answer was simple, softly-spoken in thought, and black eyes watched him from underneath equally black bangs. "However, are you quite sure that your suspicion is correct? Or are you feeling a sting of paranoia because the basic principle of the action is so alike your own scheme, four years ago? Perhaps you haven't considered the fact that, even though the percentage is on single digits, my sole intention was to be friendly? From experience, we both know that single digit percentages might as well be right."

Oh yes, he did remember. The man's suspicion of him being Kira had earlier begun on one single percent, gradually moving up to around eight, then gradually up and down. And yet, he had been right, hadn't he? He just hadn't found the evidence quick enough. "Better safe than sorry, though." He said, calmly.

"I learned my lesson, on not using that thought, quite painfully." Ryuzaki finished the piece of cake, actually putting the fork down this time. He watched the utensil, frowning softly, thumb back between his teeth. He looked somewhat anxious. Somewhat. It could also be his imagination. But even if it was his imagination, he couldn't help a sudden startled feeling, the sort of feeling you got when you had all your life been watching the same wall, and suddenly seeing it from a completely different side.

Ryuzaki looked, in a way…

Vulnerable.

It hit him like a slap to the face. He had never thought of the detective's eccentric habits to come near vulnerability. But now, under this circumstance… The way he was sitting, knees up to cover his chest, one hand securely placed on one knee, the other lifted, thumb between teeth, almost nervously nipping it as the man thought. It was slightly startling. Earlier, he had never though of it that way – perhaps because of the other's fairly cryptic ways, or his ways to boss people around without remorse, or because of his outstanding logic that was only challenged by his own?

He was on the verge of asking Ryuzaki, questioning and perhaps accusing, if his sudden trail of thought had a single percent chance of being true. If so, then there was a chance…

But he never got the chance to get that far, as suddenly, two otherworldly beings, loudly arguing, entered the room. Both he and Ryuzaki flinched at the sudden appearance of the two, and turned to the tenshi and the shinigami. In the rapid word-exchanging, he couldn't identify the words, but he sighed before voicing his dismay at the noise.

"Ryuk!" Both being shut up, and he realized that the detective had stated the tenshi's name in the exact same manner, at the exact same time. "Please don't argue in here! It was perfectly quiet **until** you two returned."

"…" Neither of them answered, but they glared daggers at each other even so. Raito sighed, agitatedly, before for the first time since he had left the car, looking at his watch.

"Holy-!" He widened his eyes slightly. A quarter past one!?

"Time sure flies by during a conversation such as this." Ryuzaki said calmly. He had seemed to recover from his thoughtful state before, and was now, believe it or not, busy finishing the last piece of the cake. Raito almost frowned in disgust. The **entire** thing! He would **never** understand the man's eating habits. Never. "But it has been a rather delightful conversation, nevertheless." Delightful? Hardly. He held in a snort.

But in a way… As he rose up and put his coffee cup on the tray, he cast the eccentric detective a look, which was unnoticed by the other, who was watching the shinigami and the tenshi while eating the final piece of apple cake.

The other was, in a weird sort of twisted way, right. It had been an enjoyable conversation. Full of unexpected twists, and some rather unpleasant, but it was the first time in a long while that he had actually needed to think carefully of what was told to him, and how he was supposed to response. It was this sort of conversation that had made him actually wish , even if it was very fleeting and never lasted long, that he had never killed the raven-haired male those four years ago.

"Raito-kun?" He looked up, having placed Ryuzaki's empty cup on the tray as well.

"Yes?"

"Are you **really** sure that you don't want any?" Oh, it was about that stupid apple cake again… He glanced at the other's plate, seeing about half the piece left.

"I'm sure." He said, with finality. He didn't eat them usually, and now was no exception. In addition, seeing Ryuzaki consume that entire cake had made him loose the small sliver of appetite he might have had before. Not to mention his disgust at the huge amount of sugar that the other's coffee had been seasoned with…

"**_Really_** sure?"

"Really sure." He nodded. "So don't feel any qualms." Tsk. It wasn't like he had showed any qualms about eating that cake before. So why now? Had guilt caught up to him?

"…If you are sure…" Ryuzaki shrugged and took another bite, still watching the both otherworldly beings. Both of them where still glaring holes into each other, and it was a rather comical sight, to see Ryuk loose his temper for once. Or rather, it would have been comical if it hadn't been for the fact that his head was splitting, **combined** with the fact that even though he had gotten some answers about Ayako Tamaki, he'd still have a lot to think abou- wait a second!

"By the way, Ryuzaki." Jet black eyes focused on him again. "You still haven't told me why you have your memories while Ayako Tamaki hasn't."

"This again?" Ryuzaki frowned softly for a moment, before glancing at the time, humming. "It is about time that I return to the hotel…"

Another try to escape it? "It's raining outside. I'll drive you." He offered, accepting the plate from the other, putting it down on the tray. He lifted it up and headed for the kitchen.

"You don't have to bother-…" He glanced back at the other, giving a small smile that was no near sincere.

"I insist." He said, calmly.

"…" Ryuzaki narrowed his eyes slightly, but nodded. "Very well." Then he added, with a slightly more thankful face. "Thank you, Raito-kun."

Raito nodded, continuing to the kitchen, a slow smirk spreading. He could always ask again once they were in the car.

And there wasn't really any excuse the detective could use there. He'd make sure of that.

** DeathNote **

The rain was still hitting the windscreen rhythmically as Raito drove out of the small residential area, and he narrowed his eyes slightly in order to be able to see the road through the blur the water created. Even if he used the windscreen wiper at maximum, it wasn't enough to keep the merciless droplets at bay. As they stopped for a red light, he allowed himself a sideways glance towards the man in the passenger seat.

Ryuzaki was being silent, as he tended to be when he thought, or wasn't included in a conversation, thumb yet again between his teeth, as he seemed to study the droplets travelling down his window with interest.

Deciding that he couldn't wait too long, or he wouldn't be able to get any answers, he opened his mouth to speak up, but – "The light is green, Raito-kun."

"…" He glanced at the stoplight which had, to his great annoyance, indeed turned green. Pressing down on the gas pedal, he drove through the intersection, resisting a foul glare to cross his face. Damn. Okay, this time surely… "Ryuzaki."

"Mhm?" The detective didn't even turn to face him, just kept those unreadable eyes on the small droplets, watching as the light from the city reflected in them. "What is it, Raito-kun."

"I'll ask, **once** again," he started, trying to sound as calm and collected as he could, "why do you still have all your memories while Ayako Tamaki has suffered from a very unique type of amnesia?"

"…" A silence followed his words, and he indistinctly wondered if he was going to be avoided, yet again. Then again, if Ryuzaki kept the matter a secret, it would only fuel his desire to get to know about it – and the detective knew that. So either he would have to tell Raito all about it, or tell him selected parts, which in turn would lead to more questions. Now it was just up to the raven-haired male to pick his choice. "There are several differences between humans and tenshi, Raito-kun."

"I have figured that much." He said, calmly, stopping for another red light. "Ordinary human beings can't restore someone's life."

"True." The other still hadn't looked away from the window, but he gave a brief nod of the head. "That's one major difference. That, along with the fact that a tenshi has a lifespan that will never end."

"They don't die?"

"We will get to that point later on, Raito-kun. They do most certainly die. But at the moment I'm answering your question regarding Tamaki-san's amnesia compared to my undamaged memory." Raito nodded, switching gear while turning left, trying to keep his eyes on the road. "The third major difference is that tenshi has the ability to read a human's memory."

"They can?" That was sure some information. But he started to see patterns now. Shinigami had the eyes to see a person's name and lifespan to benefit the Death Note – so in that case, this must have some benefit for the tenshi in reawakening humans.

"Yes. That's how they are able to restore a human being so exactly, make them be just the same way as they had been before death. The same memories, the same physical characteristics – everything. Even the psyche. That's how it was possible for me, who have been dead for four years, to return in the same state as I was before my death." Ryuzaki had finally broken his gaze from the rain, and was now watching his hand with a look that travelled between wonder and evaluation. "I, however, do not possess the means needed to see a person's former life before me, so all I can restore is what the same is for all human beings. Basic knowledge, names and birthdates… what date it is… Also, I'm limited. I can only restore a human as long as the soul is able to return to the original body."

That did make sense. It was like he couldn't see a person's name. And also… "And you can't ask Jyiva, right?"

"Correct. I assume it's the same with the Death Note." The detective looked up, watching him. He glanced towards him, but kept his focus on the road. "There is a price I could pay to restore them as they were, but…"

"It's not worth it, right?" Same as with the eyes…

"Not precisely." Ryuzaki frowned. "At any rate, that answers your question. I, who restored Ayako Tamaki, couldn't give her memories back to her, while Jyiva could restore me to my earlier state, since he's a tenshi."

"I see…" He wanted to ask another question, but he figured he should think this through first. So, Ryuzaki was limited, just like he was. He could only restore a person as long as the soul was able to return to the body… as long as it hadn't crossed over to the other side, then. Also, he hadn't the power to return their memories. So far so good. So how could he use this? There had to be some way to turn this into an advantage… but at any rate, there was something… "Do you need a person's name to restore them?"

"Correct."

"Anything else?"

"…Not really." Ryuzaki shook his head, biting his thumb again. "The soul is necessary, though. But I have a way to receive it, which I am not allowed to tell you about, Raito-kun, so you do not have to ask about it."

"…" Well, he had figured that he couldn't get to know everything. "How about the tenshi having an endless lifespan?"

"It's not entirely endless." Ryuzaki mentioned. "Obviously, just as shinigami, tenshi can die. They can live for an eternity, but once they save a person's life, they will supply that person's life with its own lifespan."

"Does that make the human having an endless lifespan too?"

"Incorrect. You can only revive people who died before their time, Raito-kun. But if a tenshi reawakens one who needs twenty years, the tenshi looses twenty years, as well."

"But how can you count an eternity and then subtract it with twenty? What do you get?"

"I **will** be getting to that point, Raito-kun." Ryuzaki's voice was that of straining patience, and so he silenced, nodding that he was listening. "You do have a point. What do you get when you subtract twenty from an eternity? There is no real answer. But the major problem doesn't arise once you saved one person. It's once you've saved up to a normal human beings average lifespan."

"What-…" He silenced as calm black eyes turned to him again, and he stopped for a red light again, waiting for the detective to continue.

"An average human's total lifespan is about eighty years. Approximately. So once a tenshi has saved, say, five people, and has gone over those eighty years, they die, in a tenshi way."

"And how does a tenshi die?"

"By loosing its wings." Ryuzaki bit his thumb again. "By becoming human."

"…!" Okay, Raito… what did we have. A tenshi lives forever, as long as it doesn't revive humans that need a total of more than eighty years. When they do, they die – they become human… Did that mean… "Do you mean that they are reborn."

"In a sense." The detective agreed, nodding. "They get reborn as humans, and without any memories of their previous life, they walk upon this world with their eighty years. Some live for ninety. It's what the total count turns out to be. If a tenshi saves five humans, and the fourth ends at seventy-nine years, and the fifth at ninety-three, then the tenshi will live as a human for ninety-three years, and then die."

"And what happens when they die after being humans?" He asked, turning right, cursing the rain under his breath as he couldn't see a thing anymore.

"That is unspoken of." Ryuzaki silenced for a moment, watching the heavily descending rain. "But they don't ever get near heaven again."

"…" Well, that was a surprise. "So saving humans doesn't give credit, then?"

"That's right." Ryuzaki nodded. "Since you are interfering with the natural laws. Against _Fate_, if you so wish. That's why the tenshi stopped reviving humans."

"So what made you the special case?" He asked, stopping by an intersection and narrowing his eyes to be able to read the sign. Then he turned right. They hadn't got that very long left.

"…Special case?" Ryuzaki asked, slowly, eyes focusing on something faraway outside the window.

"Yes. Why did they choose to reawaken you?"

"That was Jyiva's own choice." It was told to him in a very timid manner, which made him turn his head for a split second to look at the detective. "So if you wish to know that, you'd have to ask Jyiva." He would have done so, if the tenshi had been there. Both Ryuk and Jyiva had flat-out decided to not travel in the car, since they would've been forced to be so close.

They sure could be picky, at times.

"I see." He then said, simply. He continued down the road, seeing in the corner of his eyes that the detective had once again focused on the small drops of water on the window. What did he think of? Was he concerned about something, or just plotting? In that sense, they would've been the same. On both points.

This twist had him concerned. Kira's reputation would crumble if the criminals started to arise. What was the main point in Ryuzaki's plan? Would he create a group against Kira, in a way that the police had first done? Or would he create a small group from the beginning, aiming to collect as many as possible against Kira to make the police and the government start to rethink their agreement to let Kira be the law?

If that sort of thing would occur, then the government would most certainly listen to Ryuzaki, which would lead to Raito's own destruction. He had to prevent such a thing from happening. Perhaps going along with the 'friend' play, just to make sure he could keep track on the detective, much in the same way as he had done four years ago?

Or was it safer to just make sure to have as much small advantages as possible, and try to make Ryuzaki join his side? That would be rather impossible, he knew. But if Ryuzaki really had an intention of being his friend, there was a slight possibility, even if a minimal one, that he could avoid both Kira's reign to fall, and his own death.

That would most certainly be the best way. After all, Ryuzaki had returned this time, and he could negate the Death Note… however…

"What did you mean," Ryuzaki blinked, flinching a little. Obviously he hadn't suspected that Raito would speak up, "when you said you could negate the effects of the Death Note?"

"Didn't I tell you?" Ryuzaki smiled a little, looking at him again. "How clumsy of me." He was lying, it was obvious. It seemed like he had rather not told him. "A human killed by the Death Note, and has been revived, cannot be killed before the end of their lifespan."

"They cannot?"

"Correct. That's why tenshi have an eternal lifespan." He chewed his thumb again, and Raito turned the last corner left, eyeing him. "They keep supporting that person's life until the expected lifespan has run out."

"…" So that was how it was… well, that sure made things a lot harder… "Is that the same as when you revive them? Do they still negate the Death Note?"

"Correct." A nod. "Since **my** lifespan is supported by Jyiva, I can revive as many as I want and cut **my** lifespan, since my expected lifespan is not supposed to end in a while."

"So it doesn't matter how many you revive? Your lifespan isn't affected?"

"That's right." The detective looked at him, a sideway glance with a slightly amused look. "That's why it's more convenient if a human has the power to revive."

"Then why haven't they used that method before?"

"…We're here, Raito-kun." He blinked, but obediently slowed down and stopped outside the hotel. "I'll answer that question of yours in another conversation." Raito watched as the man opened the door and got out of the car. He also took notice in the hotel's name, and memorized it. Mazako Hotel.

He suddenly realized one important thing he had meant to ask, a thing that had bugged him since his conversation with Ayako Tamaki. "Wait, Ryuzaki!" The man halted the door before it fell shut, and bowed slightly to look back inside the car. "What was it you told Ayako Tamaki when you revived her!?"

"What do you mean?"

"She said that 'someone' had spoken to her, as if in a dream. What did it mean!?"

"…" Ryuzaki stood up again, and Raito leaned over slightly, to still be able to look at his face. A small frown had settled on the detective's face as he looked up at the sky, not minding the water that hit him. Raito sighed, inaudibly. This truly wasn't leading anywhere. "Once is Once – but everyone gains a second chance." He looked up, meeting calm black eyes that gazed back at him. "I hope you realize that I intend to think of you in the same way, Raito-kun?"

And before he had a chance to question him, Ryuzaki had closed the door, and had vanished in the curtain of rain.

**And THAT, my friends, is this chapter Well, it's not THAT much of a cliffhanger this time… is it? shifty glance ANYWHO!!!**

**Points for this update:**

**1. I've recently gotten some comments from some people around that four years isn't correct, since L died 5th November 2004. And yes, I have also come to realize this – BUT! Since I had only read Death Note for TWO WEEKS when I started the story, I had gone from the following points!  
- Raito found the Death Note in 2003  
- in the year 2009, Near visits the president of the united states in order to discuss what he'd found out during the past THREE YEARS.  
So with that simple math, 2009, subtract 3 years – what do you get? Exactly, 2006. I just didn't know enough (had enough information) to be able to interpret it any other way! Hope everyone can understand that reasoning ;;; So in THIS story, L dies the year 2006, which makes the year 2010 FOUR years after his death – so Nyah!**

**Until next time, minna!**

**/Keyhala **


	5. Chapter 5

**Warning:** **Both disclaimer and story include spoilers up to and including volume 7! After that, not even I know what happens, but if you haven't read volume 7, and don't want to know major spoilers – do NOT read. If you don't mind spoilers or have already read, then please go ahead **

**And here's chapter 5, everyone. Noticed that Helen posted the link to this story on xD If you can't wait, read it there xD Me and aren't the best of friends (and I'm lazy) therefore I'm not as quick at updating here ;**

**Disclaimer:** **I do not own Death Note or any of its Characters. If I did, L would never have died and There would've been a lot more yaoi laugh**

**Summary:** **In the year 2010, Kira's will has almost become the law. Raito has no more competition as the chief inspector of the NPA. Even if the role of 'L' was relinquished a year earlier, at the same time as Near and Mello got wiped from history, he has no problem, since he holds the entire police force of Japan, as well as well as the role of the worlds 'saviour', Kira. There are slight complications with the now upcoming discussions about disbanding the police, but he doesn't see it as a long-term problem.**

**Everything seems to be going fine, up until Friday the thirteenth of August, when something pretty unpredictable happens. One of the newly dead criminals, who got killed by Kira's judgement, suddenly reawakens on the hospital, three hours after her death. Shocked at this information, Raito decides to get information from the woman. But she has no memories of her life whatsoever, only her name, age and a cryptic phrase; "_Once is once – but everyone gains a second chance." _**

**Deciding to go home to think the entire situation over, he finds another shocking surprise waiting. For if a woman who has been dead can reawaken… then why couldn't also someone else?**

**Warnings:** **Yaoi (malexmale), Violence, Language**

**Well, with that in mind, why don't we get started? And my dears, please don't forget to review It would make a poor authoresses' day if you could take the time to write a decent review! Tell me what you think **

Chapter 5

Saturday the 14th of August was an annoyingly beautiful day. Not that he had anything against the sun glistering magnificently in the stray droplets - that still hung in the leaves of the trees unwaveringly clinging onto the surface, not wanting to dissolve by falling – it was just that he was in a foul mood.

A mood that most certainly didn't fit the weather. Brown eyes glared up at the annoyingly bright sun, cursing it firmly under his breath, making a middle-aged woman with her son glare at him for using that sort of language in front of a child. He resolutely ignored her, as he shot a glare at his watch. Great – here he decides to take the bus for once, and it's late.

This really wasn't Yagami Raito's day.

The woman was muttering something incoherent that sounded awfully like 'despicable rude men with no sense of vocabulary', and he actually for one second wondered if he should bring out his badge and ask for her name, before killing her. But he voted against it, as that would certainly be a way to ruin everything he had built up.

Speaking of ruining… what had really ruined his mood was the fact that even if he'd spent the entire ride back home thinking about the conversation he'd had with the detective, he hadn't come to any conclusions that would benefit him. What a pain.

But he would stand tall. He hadn't built up this world to this point for the sake of giving up **now**. There simply had to be a way to turn this situation to his advantage – just as every other situation had. Nothing was impossible. It was all about percentages. Even a small possibility could easily become one hundred percent with the help of other variables. It was just like a quadratic equation. There was always more than one solution.

And he was determined to find them all.

The bus finally showed up, stopping by the pavement with a small hiss. He picked up some pocket change and stepped onto the vehicle, dropping the coins into the driver's hand, accepted the ticket and went for the seat furthest away in the back. The woman gave him one long glare before she and her son sat down on the left row in the front. He leaned back. People usually didn't sit in the back, so it gave him a better, more silent, surrounding. Perfect if one wished to think.

And Yagami Raito wished to think on this annoyingly beautiful Saturday in August the year 2010.

He absently looked out the window, eyes narrowed in thought. Ryuzaki had been awfully picky on which questions to answer. And he hadn't gotten a real answer on most questions anyway. Nothing had been completely explained. He had started with one loose thread, and ended up with a million. Where did they tie together? Where was the final solution?

He knew Ryuzaki could revive those killed by the Death Note. And he also knew that there was no way for him to kill either Ryuzaki **or** the criminals had been revived. That, in turn would unintentionally lead to that he probably would have a though spot with a lot of criminals suffering amnesia after reawakening from their punishment - the judgement of Kira - death. And that was **not** his plan. He needed to find a way around it, somehow. He needed to outwit L, the greatest detectives of his time – and probably through all times – once again. The first time he had done so had been brilliant, his scheme had followed the exact pattern he had predicted, and had lead to his goal – getting rid of both L and the shinigami Rem.

But he couldn't use the same scheme again. He looked over to his right, eyeing Ryuk carefully. Rem had been easy to use, as she supported Misa. But Ryuk couldn't care less about what happened to him. Besides, even if Ryuk had been supporting him, the fact that he couldn't kill Ryuzaki was in the way. The only reasonable way would be killing Jyiva. But was that even humanly possible? He couldn't make the tenshi revive people as Ryuzaki was doing that job without any pay…

By the way, that had sounded awfully strange. Was it really that easy? Was it for free? And if so – why was it? And wasn't there anything to change it? He was positive that Ryuzaki was withholding more than some pieces of advice that could help him. If only he could get that…

He saw the NPA building come up in view, and stood up daintily, walking down to the doors, eyeing the woman again, as she was shooting him a nasty glare. Judging by her expression, she hoped he was at the NPA to turn himself in for a crime. What a miserable woman. He gripped his briefcase a little firmer, as the bus stopped, doors opening. The driver, whom he recognised from earlier trips as she always drove at this time, smiled at him.

"Have a good day, Chief Inspector Yagami-san."

Smiling back politely, he answered as he stepped off the vehicle. "I wish you the same, Minao-san."

As the doors closed, he looked at the woman again, a small smirk forming as he noticed she looked like she had swallowed something that was extremely sour.

It was a small light on this abnormally annoying beautiful August day.

** DeathNote **

"Ah, Raito-kun." Matsuda greeted him by the door, entering just as he did. He acknowledged the other's presence with a faint nod. "I thought you were going to take the weekend off?"

"Yesterdays situation doesn't give me any time to take the weekend off." He said simply. "After all, this is the first time in the entire history of the Kira case that we have a victim awakening."

"True." Matsuda had lowered his voice in the same way he had done, as they checked in and then went to the elevators. "So, what do we do? Do you work on any other case at the moment?"

"No. So we might as well have a little meeting." He pressed the button for the fifteenth floor, and the doors closed. "I don't think there are many police officers still working nowadays. All we ever do is writing reports on Kira's victims. And the only ones actually reading through those are you and me."

"Very true." Matsuda sighed. "The Kira case isn't really a case anymore." He nodded in sober agreement, listening to the sound of the elevator rising to the right floor. They didn't say another word. Raito frowned softly. How was he supposed to approach Tamaki Ayako's case as a police officer? Call it someone else, opposing Kira? That might be dangerous, as it could sprout rumours that Kira's rule might be ending. Then again, if he would approach it to have been Kira's objective to revive her, that would create ruckus among Kira's followers – there would be questions why those judged ones would have a new chance, while the former ones hadn't. And after all, Tamaki Ayako had **murdered**. If it had been robbery, there might have been a reason. But a murderer to get a second chance?

There was no way out in those two directions… so what could he do instead?

There was a small ring as the elevator stopped. "I'll go check if the meeting room is free." Matsuda offered, stepping out.

"I will get my laptop from the office; I'll be with you in a few minutes." Matsuda nodded and headed off. Raito watched the man leave and was hit by a sudden impulse. If he killed the man, the Kira case would be forfeited. In that case, he would just have to keep the revivals a secret, and hope the law and order kept up. If that would be the case, the killings he needed to do would be few, and so the revivals would to. As long as people respected Kira's wishes, that would work.

The only question was, in that case, how to kill Matsuda without creating a ruckus among the police… perhaps have his car crash and go down in the ocean, to never be found? Sure, there would be something about it in the newspaper, but after a while it would dim away…

But he wouldn't be able to do that before he knew more about the conditions in which Ryuzaki could revive people…

He headed to his office, shedding his coat and picking up his laptop and a few stacks of paper, turning to head back towards the meeting room, but was halted in the door by a young female officer. He searched his mind. Hanaya Miyako. "Is something wrong, Hanaya-san?"

"I was just wondering if you're currently seeing someone, Yagami-kun." This again? Honestly, it had been bad when Misa was alive, but once she died….

"No." Her eyes lit up. "And I'm not planning on seeing someone in the near future. Having your fiancée die is a severe hit to take, Hanaya-san." She dropped the smile, suddenly looking ashamed at his tone. "Would you mind moving out of my way now?"

"…Oh, sorry…" She abruptly moved aside, and he walked past her without another word. He honestly didn't want another woman by his side at the moment. Not because of sorrow over Misa's death, but because of the fact that he would so easily be uncovered. Even Misa, who also had a Death Note, had been a problem at first - and all the way through, to be honest.

He was better off without her. Hell, he was better off without anyone. He had made the choice years ago. He could have chosen to leave the notebook be, and lived a boring – normal life. Without any involvement with the detective L, Misa, shinigami Ryuk or being part in any supernatural happenings – just live as an ordinary student in a rotten world. But he hadn't chosen that. He had chosen to start something great – something that would change the world to the better. And he had – and he had no intention of letting go of that ideal now.

Pushing open the door to the meeting room with his shoulder, closing it deftly with his foot afterwards, not mentioning the small slam it created. "Stupid women…" He grumbled, as Matsuda looked at him with a weird look. Well, he could at least **pretend** he was really affected – otherwise he would seem like a cold-hearted man – which he wasn't.

"What is wrong, Raito-kun?" There was this annoyingly worried tone in the other's voice. The same tone he had always used, towards everyone. Simply because he was such a naïve man – it was a wonder he hadn't died yet.

"It's nothing important, really – it just annoys me." He said with a slightly edgy tone to his voice as he set the computer down. "Hanaya-san tried asking me out. She's the fourth in two weeks. They are outrageous! They started as soon as Misa's funeral was over!"

A sympathetic look crossed the other's face. "You've always been popular with the ladies, Raito-kun. But I do agree that it is unfair both to you and to Misa-san to be so hasty…"

"They wouldn't even let her be put to rest properly…" He grumbled, looking as persecuted as he could. He would have to keep the image up. All for the image. He had to fool them all. Pretend he had fully intended to marry the ex-model, and that he was seriously mourning her death. As long as he could keep that image up, he hoped that his family – and also, everyone else – would refrain from suggesting he'd meet another woman.

"I understand your pain, Raito-kun, and I sincerely hope they won't be that tactless anymore." He contained a small smirk. At any rate, he was always able to fool this trusting man.

"Anyhow, we're not here to discuss tactless females. Let us see what we've got on Tamaki Ayako, shall we?"

"Indeed." Matsuda shuffled through some papers as Raito booted up his computer, watching the man in the corner of his eyes. "Well, we know she died at two twenty-five PM Friday the thirteenth of August. Then she reawakened at five forty PM the same day."

"I spoke to her at approximately Seven PM that evening, and uncovered she had no memories whatsoever of her life." Fingers tapped against the keyboard rhythmically as he entered his password. "She knew her name, age, her birthday and other common facts. But she couldn't remember killing anyone, or even basic happenings in her life. Not even the names of he family members."

Matsuda hummed, writing it down on his own computer. Raito eyed him warily, but the man just seemed to write it down, not analyzing the information. Perfect. "So… what could we draw for a conclusion to this case?" Matsuda then asked, looking up. Raito frowned, thinking.

How **would** he approach this? He had to decide now. After all, the best would be… He blinked, suddenly taken of guard. Matsuda didn't seem to mind the reaction, after all, the man could think he realized something connected to the case.

Moving the cursor to the mail that had appeared in his inbox, he glanced up at the man. "As far as I can see, the awakening of Tamaki Ayako was not Kira's work."

"It wasn't?" Matsuda blinked, but wrote it down.

"Correct. Kira wouldn't be the type to awaken the 'unjust' and give them a sort of second chance." He made a pause while looking down on his screen again, masking another shock by frowning as he read the simple line, eyes narrowing slightly.

'_Have a good day at work, Raito-kun.'_

He glanced at the sender and date, and huffed, silently. The mail was sent just now. Just as he booted up the computer. And the sender was obvious. So L was watching this room too, huh? Cocky bastard. Well, it was only a matter of time before things became more interesting, after all. He clicked the reply button, while speaking up again. "Also, if it **had** been Kira's intention to reawaken her, he would have done so the instant he had killed her, to let the whole world know. He wouldn't have done it three hours later, in a place where only the doctors would notice."

"That's true, of course." Matsuda agreed, not having seen anything strange in the other male's behaviour.

'_Just how many rooms do you have bugged, Ryuzaki?'_

"So I suggest we treat the reawakening as a second case."

"Sounds reasonable." The other male was typing it up, listening with interest. Another mail popped up, and he opened it.

'_Better safe than sorry.'_ Of course.

"I also believe we should keep Tamaki Ayako's awakening a secret from the public – and if achievable, as many others as possible, as well. If we can make Kira believe the criminals stay dead, while we try finding the one awakening them, we could achieve a greater advantage."

"I didn't think of that…" Matsuda hummed. "But that's certainly smart. As long as Kira believes they stay dead, he won't make any greater actions by more meaningless killings."

"Also, if we manage to find the one reawakening them, we might have a way to lure Kira out in the open."

'_So would it be right to assume that the entire building is under your surveillance?'_

He pressed send while watching Matsuda's reaction to his words.

"So you suggest we keep the awakenings, as there might be more, a secret until we have found the person responsible… then what?"

"As soon as we have found the one reawakening them, we present it to the public, forcing Kira to try and act in order to find this person. But since we will be guarding that person, the only way to get to the person is through us."

"He would kill us."

"If he knows our names, naturally." He watched the other's face take on a look of shock and fear. "However, we would have him on tape, and if the person really can awaken human beings, we would be awakened."

"Without memories."

"A minor price to pay, I'd say." He stated, clicking open another mail.

'_It would be correct to assume such a thing, Raito-kun. Also, is there a reason to tell Matsuda-san this information? You know as well as I that exposing me to him wouldn't help your situation.'_

"Of course, I agree." Matsuda nodded quickly. "I'll immediately make sure her awakening is kept a secret, and attend to a change of her identity, but what after that?"

"I would think the best solution is a mental institution." Raito said, simply. "There no one would reveal her to the public."

"Of course." Matsuda collected his papers before rising up. "I'll attend to it immediately!"

"Do so." He watched the man leave before replying to the mail.

'_Who said I was going to let him meet you, Ryuzaki?'_

He waited a few minutes, but nothing came to reply. And he knew that the other had understood the meaning in what he had said.

** DeathNote **

Today, two things were bothering him.

One, the fact that Matsuda had troubles with understanding the concept in why they kept the awakenings a secret. And the man was currently busy trying to question it.

And two, the fact that he hadn't come anywhere closer in understanding how Ryuzaki was able to awaken them so easily, or what the terms were.

"Matsuda, please listen." He said. "We have had two more victims the last week, who have both been awakened. We have a female, age forty, killed by Kira for robbing a bank and killing one man in the process, and a male, age twenty-six, killed for kidnapping and raping a thirteen-year-old girl. Both have been reawakened, without memories."

"I know. But how long can we keep this a secret? We haven't exactly come closer in revealing who awakened them."

"We will keep it a secret as long as necessary, Matsuda." He said, firmly. "This is the largest lead we've had in years."

"I understand…" The man frowned, but left the office. Raito narrowed his eyes as he watched him go. If this kept up, he would be forced to kill the man. So he had to start planning for it, just in case.

Always be ready. That was the most important fact. Ryuk was chucking down three apples in a row next to him, and he masked a frown of disgust. He tapped his pen against the desk in thought.

On to the other thing that bothered him. He had tried to make the following two criminals die in different ways, to try and test Ryuzaki's boundaries. But so far, the detective hadn't had any trouble reviving them. Which irritated him greatly. Why had there gone an entire week without him having any luck at all?

One week, to the date, since he had found the detective on his veranda, brought back to life by a tenshi. One week since he had been forced – not that he minded that much – to think deeply. One week since every criminal he killed had arisen from death within hours after their hearts had stilled.

So Friday the 20th of August wasn't a very good day.

The worst wasn't that his thoughts didn't create any connections, but the fact that the detective hadn't made any attempt at contact since those brief e-mails on Saturday the 14th. It had been completely silent, and he was agitated at that. He **did** need more answers to figure this out. He needed more information to pull this through.

Perhaps it was this way the detective had felt when **he** had been the one searching? When Ryuzaki had desperately been trying to create some final evidence to that Raito was Kira. In that case, he understood why the detective had been so persistent.

Maybe he would need to be persistent too?

He collected his things and pulled his coat on; ignoring the fact that Ryuk was still eating apples as he left the office. He hurried down the hallway to the elevator, pushing the button for the entrance floor. He needed to be persistent. But killing more people wouldn't lead anywhere, as that would also create troubles for himself. He hadn't tried sending the detective more e-mails, and even if he would, he was assured that he wouldn't get any coherent answers. Also, he wouldn't want to give the detective any hints to that he was at a loss of what do to.

He exited the building, walking down the street. He didn't feel like going home yet, so he might as well walk. It would be dark in half an hour, but he wasn't minding that. After all, he needed to think. And what was better than thinking while walking mindlessly around in the city.

Nothing, that's what.

So, killing criminals wouldn't solve anything at this time, and neither would killing Matsuda. Even if he did so, there was a huge possibility that Ryuzaki would awaken him. He would have to wait and kill the man once he found under which circumstances the detective could **not** revive someone.

His mind vaguely registered the soft patter of raindrops, but he didn't even mention it. Let it rain. What would he care. He needed to come to a conclusion with this. His only option would be speaking to the detective. But he knew that if he was starting to ask more persistently, then he would seem desperate, stressed. That would give the detective an opportunity to gain an advantage in knowing that Raito was stressed about his existence.

The dark had started to envelop the city now, the streetlights turning on to provide some sort of light. Ryuk still hadn't joined him. Either the shinigami was close, flying around somewhere, or he was still eating apples. At any rate, that didn't faze him.

What did faze him, though, was where he finally came to a halt, figuring that the rain was too severe to walk in anymore. As he looked up to the building – to see where the closest subway station was – he flinched, eyes widening.

Mazako Hotel.

"You have to be joking…" He grumbled, but then shook his head, shaking wet hair out of his eyes, and walked up to the entrance. There was no point in walking past if he was here. Sure, he might seem pushy, but if the detective asked, he could say he had been walking past. After all, even if he might have subconsciously sought his way there, it was true.

After entering the hotel, he did though realize one major problem. He had no idea what alias the detective was currently using. Also meaning, there was no way for him to find the correct room that way. He contemplated walking out again. There would be a subway station only a few blocks up ahead – but he changed his mind as the rain was now coming down even harder.

This was just great… he stayed where he was, staring out the window at the rain that hit the pavement forcefully. He really hated this weather. Either it was too warm and sunny for his tastes, or the rain would wash away the entire city. Okay, so he exaggerated slightly, but he was just in that mood at the moment. His eyes unfocused slightly, almost looking **at** the window, yet still looking outside.

"Staring out the window all night won't lead you anywhere, Raito-kun." He flinched forcefully – blinking once – seeing past his own reflection in the window. His eyes met the black-haired man behind him, and he spun around, facing him.

The detective eyed him with something between wonder and patience. Raito took notice that Ryuzaki wasn't wearing shoes, meaning he hadn't been outside. Also, one hand was holding a package of pocky, the other hand holding one of the treats as the raven-haired male bit off a piece of it. "I'm just waiting for the rain to subside." Raito then said, calmly.

"And I was just getting some snacks." Ryuzaki gestured with the pocky stick casually, before inclining his head towards the elevator. "We can talk in my room."

"But I-"

"Don't try to say you were just passing by – you live in the other direction from the police station. You came here to get answers." As the detective didn't receive any protest, he turned, heading for the elevator, "This way then, Raito-kun."

And Raito followed, even if he mentally cursed the detective for being able to read his mind.

**WEEEEE! End of chapter 5 xD And no… I didn't think this was a cliffhanger… was it? looks around I hope it wasn't… at any rate! Keep reviewing! I love you all, so don't abandon me!!!**

**As said – the only way I can know if you liked the chapter, is if you review – so DO NOT FORGET TO REVIEW AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!**

**Just had to say that **

**Until next time!**

**/Keyhala**


	6. Chapter 6

**Warning:** **Both disclaimer and story include spoilers up to and including volume 7! After that, not even I know what happens, but if you haven't read volume 7, and don't want to know major spoilers – do NOT read. If you don't mind spoilers or have already read, then please go ahead **

**Okay, so today I feel generous. And what do I mean with that? Well – I'll post BOTH chapters 6 AND 7 today! Feel grateful xD**

**Disclaimer:** **I do not own Death Note or any of its Characters. If I did, L would never have died and There would've been a lot more yaoi laugh**

**Summary:** **In the year 2010, Kira's will has almost become the law. Raito has no more competition as the chief inspector of the NPA. Even if the role of 'L' was relinquished a year earlier, at the same time as Near and Mello got wiped from history, he has no problem, since he holds the entire police force of Japan, as well as well as the role of the worlds 'saviour', Kira. There are slight complications with the now upcoming discussions about disbanding the police, but he doesn't see it as a long-term problem.**

**Everything seems to be going fine, up until Friday the thirteenth of August, when something pretty unpredictable happens. One of the newly dead criminals, who got killed by Kira's judgement, suddenly reawakens on the hospital, three hours after her death. Shocked at this information, Raito decides to get information from the woman. But she has no memories of her life whatsoever, only her name, age and a cryptic phrase; "_Once is once – but everyone gains a second chance." _**

**Deciding to go home to think the entire situation over, he finds another shocking surprise waiting. For if a woman who has been dead can reawaken… then why couldn't also someone else?**

**Warnings:** **Yaoi (malexmale), Violence, Language**

**Well, with that in mind, why don't we get started? And my dears, please don't forget to review It would make a poor authoresses' day if you could take the time to write a decent review! Tell me what you think **

Chapter 6

He tried to look unfazed, try to make it seem like he only followed along because the detective had asked him to. But he realized that looking in another direction would either make him look awfully awkward, or just like he had a wish to disappear on the spot. Also, he didn't feel like it would be such a good idea to look at the raven-haired male's back, either. Maybe he would appear to be rude? Not that he really cared if the other found him rude or not – he just didn't want himself to seem stressed, in any way.

So instead he kept his gaze just above the other's slumped shoulder, trying to look neutral, as he calmed himself slowly by listening to the surrounding sounds. Small chatter from other people in the corridor – even if there weren't many – the lithe sound of raindrops against the outside wall, and the soft thump of their feet against the carpeted floor. He even started recognise the different sounds between his, shoe-clad feet, and the other's bare ones. That was when he started realizing he had to find something else to focus on.

"What alias do you use here?" He said then, softly, and he noticed a small flinch in the other's shoulders.

"I'm going by the name of Hiyashi Ryuzaki." The answer was spoken with a small thoughtful tone as the detective walked on, not looking back at him. He was searching through his pocket with one hand, and then stopped in front of a door. Raito looked up at the number. 361. Good to know.

"It wasn't a question to gain access to important files or something." He said, as the raven-haired male unlocked the door. Jet black eyes glanced over, a small hint of something that could be called suspicion in them. "It was just as preparation, just in case I want to come speak to you again."

"…That sounds like an understandable reason." The small plastic card that had recently been drawn through the slot had vanished again, as the door was opened. The detective stepped inside leisurely. "Welcome inside. Please take a seat in the sofa for the time being. I will make some coffee first. Would you like a cup?" Ryuzaki looked back at him again, and he gave a small nod as he closed the door after them.

"That would be very nice, thank you." His answer was confirmed with a small hum as the detective made his way to the small kitchen area. Raito looked after him for a moment before hanging up his coat and entering the room. He took notice in the fact that the room was tidy – even though it might have been rude, he had thought it would be rather messy – and that it seemed… hollow. Even if the other only intended to stay for a while, it looked as if it hadn't been used at all. Nothing had been moved.

"I mainly use the bedroom and the kitchen, Raito-kun." Ryuzaki mentioned, only having raised his voice slightly to be heard. Raito couldn't help the small startled flinch. **How** could the other read him just like that? "There is no need to overuse the entire room."

"You **are** paying for the entire room, so why not use it?" He questioned, sitting down on the sofa, gaze resting on the detective, as the raven-haired male shrugged casually.

"As I said, there is no need to do so, Raito-kun." Once again, such a simple answer. So casual… and… So very lonely.

It was not that the other _sounded_ particularly lonely, it was just the entire aura of the sentence, combined with the cold look of the room. It was… chilling. When they had 'worked' on the case, with the not so very intimidating – yet strong – task force, the aura of the rooms had been… lively… almost familiar. But this…

This was just plain eerie.

Had this been the way the detective had been living all the time up until the Kira case? If so, it was a rather startling finding. He looked away from the raven-haired man and gazed around the empty room again.

As his gaze met blank silver pools, he started again. Jyiva looked calmly back at him, appearing to be leaning against a wall. Raito narrowed his eyes slowly, but the tenshi didn't change his appearance the slightest. He was only looking calmly back at him - in a way that vaguely reminded him of Ryuzaki. Looking completely open, yet was impossible to read.

"Do you want milk in your coffee, Raito-kun?"

"No thanks." He said, simply, breaking his gaze from the tenshi for the time being, glancing back towards the kitchen area, seeing the detective pick a few sugar cubes out of the bowl to drop them, one by one, into his cup. As Ryuzaki reached for the sugar again, he didn't mention it, only watched the detective put another four cubes into the same cup.

The third time he reached for the bowl, though, he reacted. Because he then realized that not even Ryuzaki would bother putting more than nine cubes into the same cup of coffee. Which only lead to one conclusion.

He rose up quickly, not mentioning the way the tenshi seemed to tense at his sudden movement, and instead of verbally informing the detective of his sudden predicament, he rushed forward.

The sugar cubes fell from a limp hand, hitting first the counter and then the floor, and not until then did Raito realize the mistake in rushing forward. As he had grabbed the detective's hand to prevent him from putting the sugar cubes into the brunet's coffee, he had been forced to stretch his own hand across the raven-haired male's body, resulting in a quite forceful collision.

They joined the sugar cubes on the floor with a painful thud, and his vision went momentarily black as the detective's right elbow hit him beneath the ribs. As he regained his breath, yet not opening his eyes, he realized two things.

One, he had gotten away easy while the detective had probably gotten a harsher hit.

Two, the current situation didn't look very promising.

"…Raito-kun…" He bit his lip, holding his breath as the detective spoke up. He didn't dare to look, understanding how reckless he had been. He also noted something else. The wrist he was still holding in his right hand was shaking. Not forcefully, but shaking nevertheless. "C-Could you be so kind and let my wrist go…" He didn't miss the small stutter at the beginning of the sentence, and he let go of the other's wrist immediately while reopening his eyes.

He saw black pools gazing back at him, and for once he noted that the other looked… awkward. And unusually pale, even for being Ryuzaki. "Sorry…" He mumbled – feeling dumb – and sat up carefully, giving the detective room to do so as well.

Not wanting to look more awkward than he already felt, he stood up, brushing his clothes off. He was also careful to not look at Ryuzaki. His mind nagged him a little. Why had the detective reacted so strangely? Maybe it was just shock. That would explain a lot.

"…" He bit his lip a little again, not liking the silence. He could see the tenshi in the corner of his eye, but the angel looked unfazed, with the sole exception of a slight tense stance, as if ready to act. Uncertainly, he looked back towards the detective, only to find that he had yet to rise from the floor. "…Are you alright, Ryuzaki?"

Ryuzaki had only risen into a sitting position, and was awkwardly looking at his still trembling hand, frowning softly. He didn't even mention Raito's attempt at contacting him.

"Hey. Ryuzaki." He said again, firmer. "Are you okay?" Opaque black eyes glanced up at him, slowly.

"…I'm fine." Ryuzaki said, after a short second, standing up without pausing from talking. "If you didn't wish for me to put sugar in your coffee, Raito-kun, you could have just told me so."

"I'm sorry." He said, awkwardly, watching the detective move back towards the cups. "Are you sure you're fine? No injuries…?"

"I'm quite alright." The detective met his gaze for a short second. "I had more severe injuries during our small quarrels four years ago, Raito-kun." He picked the small tray up and then nodded towards the sofa. "Please, take a seat."

"…" He complied without protest, sitting down on the sofa as the raven-haired male put the tray on the table, before seating himself in the armchair. Without a word, Raito reached out to pick his cup up, and took a sip in silence.

"As I said downstairs," Ryuzaki started softly, taking a sip from his own cup, "I would guess you are here because something irks you, Raito-kun. I will also be so bold as to assume the something that is bothering you is somewhat connected with the conversation we had last week."

"That's correct." He said, nodding. Funny, now the detective had gone straight back to his ordinary self, with calm, soft-spoken sentences and refined language, and nothing in his demeanour or appearance gave away any evidence of what had just happened. He faintly wondered if he also looked calm. If so, he surely was good at masking his feelings. For he felt anything but calm.

"Then may I ask; what is bothering you?"

"To be completely honest – you." Jet black eyes looked up at him for a moment, questioning. "The fact that you've told me a lot – a **whole** lot, actually – and yet… It doesn't make me any wiser – because it doesn't connect anywhere. It doesn't make any sense. You got reawakened by angels – and I don't have a clue of **what** they really are. Also, you're able to reawaken humans who have been killed, and it is for free? There is no price to pay in order to do so? It's just… it sounds too easy."

"That's true." A small nod accompanied the words. "It does sound too easy." Was that a confession? That it in reality **wasn't** that easy? Or was it just a confirmation that is **sounded** too easy – but it wasn't as it sounded? Ryuzaki really didn't make much sense.

"What is true?" He asked then, quickly. "The fact that it **sounds** too easy, or that it **is** that easy?"

"…" The other hesitated for a short amount of time while taking a sip of his coffee. "It sounds too easy." He then answered, simply. "That's all the information I can give you, Raito-kun."

All the information he **could** give… or all the information he **wanted to** give? That was the main question. But he didn't voice it. By asking, he would seem pushy – stressed. And he knew he was looking stressed already – so why worsen the situation? He just had to calmly process this information. Put it into the correct files of his mind and analyze it. If he just kept himself collected, he should be able to tie some of the loose strings together. "I see." He nodded, taking a sip. "Than what **can** you tell me, Ryuzaki?"

"That is all depending on what you ask for, Raito-kun." Of course. Another evasive answer. So he was only able to get answers to concrete questions. And by giving such concrete enquiries, he would give the detective a secure lead to what he was trying to achieve by asking that certain question. He had to admit, the raven-haired male surely was confident that he wasn't going to miss out on any details.

So where should he start without creating a too certain lead as to what he was trying to achieve? "Very well… how about the tenshi?"

"What about him?"

"You have spoken a lot about yourself. But I hardly know anything about Jyiva, except that he's an angel of the high order."

Jet black eyes watched him emotionlessly, obviously trying to get him to explain his question further. "Why is information about Jyiva anything that you feel concerned with, Raito-kun?"

"**Because**," he said, drawing the word out carefully, putting the cup down on the table, "I'm simply trying to tie together some loose threads here, okay?"

"Don't we all?" He almost blinked at the undemanding answer, and looked back up into black eyes. "I have a hard time comprehending you as well, Raito-kun."

"And why is that?"

"It's quite simple." The detective rose up, collecting both cups before walking over to the kitchen area and putting them down on the counter. Turning to look at him, he leaned against the counter, thumb between his teeth in thought. "I still have a tough time identifying with why a sharp, logical young man such as yourself would use that brilliant mind of yours for something that is so clearly – in every logical aspect – evil."

"Simple questions get simple answers." He replied, closing his eyes languidly. "I don't ever think of my actions as evil, Ryuzaki. Sure, there have been deaths that were quite unnecessary in normal aspects, but I never regretted them. For the better of this world, sacrifices are required."

"Six **million** five-hundred and seventy-two **thousand**."

"What?" He blinked his eyes open, looking over at the other, realizing the detective had moved to the window.

"**Six million five-hundred and seventy-two thousand** human beings, Raito-kun." Opaque black eyes glanced back at him, with a small hint of melancholy mirroring in them – but that might just as well have been his imagination. "That is the amount of 'sacrifices' your _noble_ goal has achieved. That's almost one percent of the entire human population."

"…" He didn't know what to answer. In all honesty, he didn't. Sure, he knew he had killed many – he had been prepared for having that fact on his conscience… But to have it written out for him… Six and a half million… in seven years…

"And there could have been a lot more, couldn't there, Raito-kun?" Ryuzaki continued, nipping his thumb again. "Your actions made criminals all over the world go into hiding, no new crimes where committed… But tell me, in all honesty…"

"…What?" He asked, silently.

The detective broke their connected gaze to look out the window. "Do you believe that those six and a half million human lives were worth it?"

"…" Once again, he had no answer at first. It was startling, in a way. To get it all – black on white – and to have your one chosen nemesis ask you if it 'was all really worth it'... He was… startled, to say the least. So all he could do was stare at the detective's back, brown eyes widened slightly. Then he looked down, on his hands, and rose up.

The raven-haired male didn't move, but he could see black eyes eyeing him in the reflection of the window, flicking slightly as he closed up. He stopped on the other's left side, two feet behind him. He let his gaze travel out the window as well. For a long while, neither of them said a word. Occasionally, Raito would glance at the tenshi, who was motionlessly watching them. Then he would look back at the window, thinking about the situation again.

Six and a half million people… he had to find a rational thinking point. By killing those criminals… those millions of criminals… he had saved people. He had saved people who had been afraid of even leaving the house because criminals had been roaming around. He blinked once, but didn't let his startled demeanour show. Perhaps the sole intention of Ryuzaki's question wasn't to see if he really was 'evil', but if he could counterweight what he had done.

True, he had killed that many human beings – and he knew he would never be forgiven for that. However… "It is worth it." He said, calmly, quietly. He met the other's gaze in the reflection. "Condemning my own soul and playing god over that many human lives… It's all worth it – as long as this world turns back to the path of light – of righteousness."

The detective closed his eyes, a small sigh escaping his lips. "I did fear such an answer…"

He did **fear** such an answer? What was that supposed to mean? Neither of them moved, while Raito eyed the other in the corner of his eyes, appearing to look out into the pouring rain. Ryuzaki reopened his eyes, slowly. But he didn't speak up. It was as if both of them were silently contemplating the situation – which wouldn't be startling at all.

Why had the detective brought up the amount of wrongdoers he had passed judgement on? As he remembered, they had been talking about the tenshi. However, he didn't find the words to remind the other of that, instead he just found himself continuously staring out that window. Moreover, he sporadically glanced right, watching the raven-haired male's reflection for any sign of what was going on in the other's mind. But those eyes didn't give away anything – it was just as he had remembered it.

Without Raito noticing it, the black eyes he was secretly studying turned slightly, until in the end meeting his look in the window's reflection. "I have one question for you, Raito-kun."

"You've already asked one question." He said, calmly, a small smile tugging at his lips. The smile wasn't mirrored. The detective merely looked disturbed. "Sure, ask on."

"Say that someone else decided to follow your path," Ryuzaki turned a little, so that he was looking at Raito, not only the reflection in the glass, "would he then be justified if he killed you?"

Dumb question. But even so, there might have been a point in asking that. At any rate, he hadn't any trouble in answering the question. "Yes."

"So he would have had the right to kill you?"

If he was going to get under the other's skin at this rate, he would have to play along a little, confuse the other as well as gaining some sort of sympathy. He knew it wouldn't be easy, but he wouldn't give up without a fight. "I'm a condemned soul too, Ryuzaki." He said, looking past the other, out the window. "I have, too, committed crimes that are unforgivable."

"Then why do you keep going?" Was that a trick question? He saw that the other still looked at him, inquiringly. "If you're a convict too, why don't you try and repent for the crimes you've committed?"

"By turning myself in, you mean?" He asked, looking back at the other, smirking faintly. "Since I know my punishment will come once the time is right?"

"…" Ryuzaki frowned, but Raito didn't explain himself further, turning around to meet the sight of the two otherworldly beings glaring at each other. So Ryuk seemed to have either gotten tired of flying around outside, or he wanted an apple. Probably the last alternative. He watched the shinigami calmly. The judgement passed out on him would be dealt by this being. Ryuk had told him already in the beginning – he was the one who would ultimately take Raito's life. And there was no telling when.

"Why don't we leave that subject behind-"

"What will happen once you die, Raito-kun?" He paused, blinking. He didn't look back at the other, instead sat down on the sofa again.

"I'm afraid I don't understand what you mean."

"You might think you are justified in killing six and a half million human beings, Raito-kun, but won't it all be in vain once you die?" He looked up as the other sat down in the armchair again, casually looking at him with his usual – straightforward – look. "Or do you plan on passing it on to someone else? Your _noble mission_? Are you going to condemn and burden someone else's soul – or are you going to let the world fall back into despair?"

"Obviously, I won't let my work go to waste." He answered, calmly. He leaned back a little while placing his elbow on the backrest of the sofa, leaning his head against the back of his hand. "However, on the question of 'how' and 'why', I still haven't found the answer."

"And what if you die before you can decide?" What was it the detective was trying to achieve by asking these questions?

"I won't die before I decide." He said, firmly. He had a hunch, after all. Ryuk would let him live for as long as he was 'amusing' or 'useful' to the shinigami. Meaning, as long as he could continue killing criminals – or others – and give the shinigami apples, he'd probably be alright. After all, he knew that Ryuk was addicted to apples, and if he hadn't got anyone to give him apples, he'd probably go insane.

But that was also his only lifeline.

"How can you be so sure?" Ryuzaki asked, and as Raito looked over the detective's shoulder, Ryuk gave him a quite surprised look. He smirked and leaned over a little, opening his briefcase. Better emphasise his point properly.

"Oh, I am sure." He said, before lifting the apple out of the briefcase, tossing it to the shinigami, who gave him a confused look but caught the fruit by habit. As the death god ate the apple, Ryuzaki looked from the being back to Raito, frowning softly.

"…Apples…" He mumbled. Raito waited, patiently, leaning back a little.

"Apples." He confirmed, nodding. Ryuzaki blinked once, and looked up, a look of realization on his face.

"_L, do you know… Gods of Death…_ "

"_Only eat apples._" Ratio ended, smoothly, leaning back. The detective hummed softly, before nipping his thumb.

"And here I thought you were only pulling my leg with that one." Raito gave a small shrug, watching Ryuk finish the fruit before glaring curtly at Jyiva. Now that the former subject had been dropped…

"Can I ask you now, and get an honest answer?"

"Go ahead."

"I asked you once before – but… **what** is Jyiva. And not just in all it's simplicity. What is the whole story?"

"The entire story…" Ryuzaki rose up. "The entire story needs some sweets. Do you care for something?"

Frowning a little at the thought of the huge amount of sugar the other would probably digest. That was enough to make him firmly, yet politely, decline. "No thank you. I'll be fine."

"If you say so…" The raven-haired male strolled over to the phone, lifting it in his usual odd method, between thumb and index finger, before punching a number nimbly. Raito turned his attention away from the detective to look at the tenshi instead, frowning. He really wanted to know…

"Why is it in your interest to know what we are, human?" He started, blinking, as the tenshi spoke up. His tone was as cold as his eyes, and Raito suppressed a small shiver. He surely hadn't expected that tone…

"It would be in any human's regular interest to know about otherworldly creatures, wouldn't you agree?" He countered casually. Ryuk snorted softly at Jyiva when the tenshi narrowed his eyes. Raito arched a brow at the shinigami, but before he had any time to say anything, the shinigami left the room, without a word. What the-?

"It would be a true statement to make, yes." Jyiva answered, coolly. Both of them fell silent, and Raito found his eyes travelling back to the detective, faintly wondering how many pastries and cakes the eccentric male would order… probably enough to last the entire night – and to make any ordinary human being to throw up.

After another minute, the detective closed the call and placed the phone back, returning to his seat, agilely pulling both feet up to assume his usual position. "They should be delivering it shortly. While we are waiting, we might as well start."

"I agree."

"So what do you wish to know first?" Ryuzaki glanced at Jyiva, slowly.

"Let's just start with the basic story of Jyiva, shall we?" He countered, leaning back.

"Then that is not my story to tell." The detective said, calmly. "If Jyiva wishes to tell you, then that is fine, otherwise, there is nothing I can do to assist you in that question."

"Fine." Raito turned his eyes to the tenshi. "If you would be so kind to quench my curiosity?"

"..." Jyiva gave him a long, cold look, before nodding curtly. "Very well. I do realize that in order for you to realize the grave mistake you have made, there is a point in giving you some insight on these matters." What the hell was that supposed to mean? He frowned, but only nodded.

"Very well." He said, a small smirk spreading. "I'm all ears."

**And THAT is chapter 6! **

**Points for chapter 6:**

**Raito MIGHT be a little OOC in this chapter. Why? As he is a VERY rational and thoughtful person, it is hard to get some interesting twists without him loosing his cool once or twice xD If he's TOO awfully OOC – please let me know!**

**I know that six and a half million sounds like A LOT – even for seven years – but I was doing a little check-up on the amount of convicts in prison in the world, and with a little guess and also thinking rather rationally, we have about 4 to 5 million criminals in prison in the world (More than one million in the US, more than one million in China etc.) and then we have criminals and terrorists free around the world. Those aren't few. Also, we have to keep in mind that Raito HAS killed criminals for petty crimes as pick pocketing and alike (during the 'hidden camera' period) so the amount of killed humans SHOULD have been pretty large. So say he killed ALL imprisoned and loose criminals, we easily reach six and a half million, in my opinion. If you have comments about that, let me know. But this was my reasoning when writing it.**

**Yay! We get to 'hear' Jyiva speak. And in the next chapter, we will get to know a LOT about tenshi, heaven and PERHAPS a little about why shinigami and tenshi despise each other (except by being on the opposite side of the scale from each other xD)**

**/Keyhala**


	7. Chapter 7

**Warning:** **Both disclaimer and story include spoilers up to and including volume 7! After that, not even I know what happens, but if you haven't read volume 7, and don't want to know major spoilers – do NOT read. If you don't mind spoilers or have already read, then please go ahead **

**AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND** **here's chapter 7!**

**Disclaimer:** **I do not own Death Note or any of its Characters. If I did, L would never have died and There would've been a lot more yaoi laugh**

**Summary:** **In the year 2010, Kira's will has almost become the law. Raito has no more competition as the chief inspector of the NPA. Even if the role of 'L' was relinquished a year earlier, at the same time as Near and Mello got wiped from history, he has no problem, since he holds the entire police force of Japan, as well as well as the role of the worlds 'saviour', Kira. There are slight complications with the now upcoming discussions about disbanding the police, but he doesn't see it as a long-term problem.**

**Everything seems to be going fine, up until Friday the thirteenth of August, when something pretty unpredictable happens. One of the newly dead criminals, who got killed by Kira's judgement, suddenly reawakens on the hospital, three hours after her death. Shocked at this information, Raito decides to get information from the woman. But she has no memories of her life whatsoever, only her name, age and a cryptic phrase; "_Once is once – but everyone gains a second chance." _**

**Deciding to go home to think the entire situation over, he finds another shocking surprise waiting. For if a woman who has been dead can reawaken… then why couldn't also someone else?**

**Warnings:** **Yaoi (malexmale), Violence, Language**

**Well, with that in mind, why don't we get started? And my dears, please don't forget to review It would make a poor authoresses' day if you could take the time to write a decent review! Tell me what you think **

Chapter 7

"For you to understand the basic concept of the high order tenshi, it would be easier if you first understood the basic concept of all tenshi." Jyiva spoke, slowly. Raito didn't move, merely gave a small nod for the creature to continue. "No one speaks of how a tenshi is born. One day we just are. And no angel has any memory of before they started to exist."

They just **were**? They just suddenly appeared? Very well, he just had to go with that for the time being. He didn't want to make unnecessary interruptions and cause the conversation to be cut short. He needed information in order to continue on. He wasn't going to let himself be locked up in a position in which he was bound to loose.

"At any rate, tenshi are divided into three major groups." The tenshi continued, silver eyes locking calmly with his. "First we have the lower order – cherub, followed by the main order – angelus – and lastly, we have the high order, seraphim. All groups have different means and duties. The cherub order, for example, serves to oversee the souls' passing through the purgatory lands."

"The land between life and death, correct?" He asked, getting a small nod of affirmation. He frowned softly. So even that existed. The land in which passed souls waited for their judgement. Interesting, yet terrifying in an awkward way. He had never been the one to believe in either heaven or hell. Then again, most people didn't believe in the existence of shinigami, either. "What about the other orders?"

"The Angelus order governs over the heavens, and watches over the souls residing there." The seraphim continued, closing his eyes for a brief second. "And the seraphim order is in the high council, and also oversees the book of the dead, the Kiseki. Souls who are passing on when their lifespan runs out appear in the book before they are being judged based on their memories and happenings."

"I see your problem now." Raito said, as the tenshi had silenced. He leaned back, eyeing both the tenshi and Ryuzaki casually. "Since the names only appear in the Kiseki naturally when they die of a natural death, the criminals I pass judgement on aren't in it when they cross over – correct?"

"You are correct." Jyiva said calmly, while Ryuzaki nodded, the package of pocky enigmatically appeared out of nowhere. The detective then continued by calmly taking out one of the treats and biting off a piece of it. "When someone dies unexpectedly, which can only occur when a shinigami or a human writes someone's name in the death note, the name must be written into the Kiseki afterwards, and the judgement will be prolonged because of lack of information. Also, when someone hasn't lived their entire predicted life, they cannot be judged correctly, as they haven't lived their entire life, and they are – rather unfairly – judged based on what they used their given lifespan for."

"But all of them were criminals, so there wouldn't be a problem." Raito replied smartly. He didn't see the point here. Evil-doers went to hell, easy as that. And if criminals weren't evil-doers, then who were?"

"The only problem is that you ended their life before they could repent for what they did." Ryuzaki said, biting off another piece of the pocky stick. Raito blinked at him. "Everyone makes mistakes, Raito-kun. Everyone has a dark spot on their conscience. But if we repent for what we do, even the worst criminal can go to heaven."

"A mass murderer?"

"Do I hear an implication towards your own self, Raito-kun?" There was a clear hint of curious waywardness in the other's voice, and he decided to only snort at the other. "It is possible. If a mistake you made causes a hundred people to die, you can repent for it, and still go to heaven. If you deliberately kill the same amount of people, and don't regret it, however, you won't be accepted through the gates of heaven."

"So it is all in the will of the action?" Raito hummed. Sounded reasonable, but it was still not right. Anyone could say that they were sorry – that didn't mean that they actually **were** sorry, though.

"At any rate, the trouble lies in the fact that purgatory is filled with souls waiting to get judged, but since none of them are listed in the Kiseki, it can take very long time before they can pass on correctly. The cherub order has been forced to ask for reinforcements from the angelus order, and the angelus order from the seraphim order. That was how I came to meet L."

He blinked once. So maybe it hadn't been planned? "So you were serving as substitute for one from angelus order when you first met Near, and then Ryuzaki?"

"Correct." A nod. "That was how we got to know the true facts about why the sudden activity of the death note had occurred. Since we left the living world alone, we haven't gazed back on it ever since – until now."

"So at first, you had no idea why?"

"No. The closest guess we got was that the shinigami started collecting life in a frantic manner." Jyiva locked gazes with him, a stern look. "And so far, only I know of the truth."

"So the other tenshi do not know about this – at all?" This could be useful. He didn't exactly know in what way yet, but the fact that him being Kira still was only known by that few beings was a little soothing.

"Not a thing. After my first conversation, I tried telling the high council about my findings, but they wouldn't believe me – nor did they believe a mere human being would know anything about the current predicament."

"So they didn't believe Ryuzaki either?"

"They didn't even want to hear him out." Jyiva said, slowly. Ryuzaki was still devouring pocky, eyes a little vacant as he seemed to look at a wall. Raito looked back at the tenshi. "At any rate, the current situation is that the tenshi high council believes that these sudden killings are the shinigami's doing. They are assured that the shinigami are preparing for something that could be war."

"War?" he echoed, suddenly frowning. Now this seemed to take a strange turn.

"Indeed." Jyiva frowned, the first real facial expression Raito had seen on the otherworldly being. "As our powers cancel each others out, they have to stock up on life force in order to fight us."

"In what way would they be afraid of you?"

"Because," Raito jumped a little as Ryuzaki spoke up, "when a tenshi restores a human's life, the life force the shinigami gained goes to vain, and they are back where they started."

"And while the tenshi return people to life, they shorten their own life. Guess like it's a complete tie, then." Raito looked at Jyiva, calmly.

"Unless the shinigami kills a lot of humans. If it kills more than four or five, one tenshi cannot completely kill it before dying." Jyiva closed his eyes for a brief second. "That's why the council is in an absolute uproar. They are convinced the shinigami are aimed at war."

"And what does that have to do with me?" He didn't see the tenshi's point. Okay, so maybe a war would break out between tenshi and shinigami, but that really didn't have anything to do with him. Unless… of course…

Ryuzaki answered before the tenshi had the time to. "If the shinigami were to hear about it, they'd start killing humans in fury to get their life up. Also, of course…" His calm eyes focused on Raito's as he bit of another piece of the pocky. "…they'd make sure that the inconvenience that started the tenshi's suspicion of them – as well as stealing a lot of important life sources – was taken care – and disposed – of."

"…" He narrowed his eyes slightly. Of course. That did make sense. If a war was on the brink of breaking out, he was pretty sure that the shinigami – lazy as they were – would assure that Ryuk killed him, in order to calm the tenshi. "So, were you telling the high council that I was killing them to avoid the war between the tenshi and the shinigami, or because you figured that they would agree to try and make me change my mind?"

"No." Jyiva shook his head. "I knew the shinigami weren't doing it, and I am sure that the high council would notice too, as the killings would stop as soon as we sent out a warning to the shinigami – since they would kill you."

"Then, why?" He asked, narrowing his eyes further. There was a knock on the door, and Ryuzaki stood up smoothly.

"I think that's a cue to be silent…" He mumbled, setting down the box of pocky before sauntering over to the door. Raito watched the detective's back as he opened the door, greeting whoever had brought up the massive amount of sugary treats for the raven-haired male, when Jyiva spoke up, calmly.

"The answer is quite obvious." A small pause occurred as Raito arched a brow, glancing at the tenshi from the corner of his eyes. "L asked of me to tell the high council."

"…" He blinked, baffled. What? He stared at the tenshi now, and was glad that he had just heard the door close. "Why would he do that?"

"That's also quite obvious, Raito-kun." Ryuzaki spoke, having placed the tray with his order on the counter, lifting of a piece of strawberry shortcake and a small silver fork, before joining them again, sitting down without giving Raito's questioning stare a second of affirmation. "My main course here is to stop your actions while, if possible, manage to keep you from recklessly losing your life."

"…Why would you be concerned if I lived or died? You just want to stop Kira, don't you?" He asked, sternly. The detective took a bite of the cake, glancing up at him. For a while, not a single word was spoken, and the raven-haired male looked back down on his cake, using the fork to push the strawberry to the side before continuing with the cake itself.

"I want to stop Kira – that is correct." Raito hummed, knowingly, and leaned back again, closing his eyes. So he had been right. Well, not that it mattered much. If push came to shove, he had to pass one of the unattended death notes over to someone else. As a safety measure in case the shinigami really planned on killing him. Because none of the other two had a shinigami attached, there wouldn't be a problem. And since Ryuzaki's main goal was to stop Kira, he'd be satisfied too, for the time being. "However," he looked up, blinking at the other as Ryuzaki pierced the strawberry with the fork and brought it up to his mouth before taking a piece of it, black eyes studying him still, "I do wish to save Yagami Raito."

"…That doesn't make any sense." He said, snorting. "You've said it yourself, that Yagami Raito is Kira. Nothing has changed. I am still Kira; you still know that with a hundred percent certainty."

"That is true. Yagami Raito is Kira, with a hundred percent certainty. But during a certain amount of time, Yagami Raito was only Yagami Raito." He knew very well what the detective was referring to. To the time when he had ended his ownership of the death note, and lost all his memories of it, in order to fool the detective.

"That was all a fraud." He said, frowning. "It was a part of the plan."

"Of course. But there is still no denying that during that certain amount of time, you where no other than yourself, Raito-kun. And during that time, you wished to stop Kira, and had the same determination as I. So in a manner of speaking, as soon as one subtracts the Kira inside of you, you are Yagami Raito."

"That's just plain nonsense." He snorted accentuating. "**That** Yagami Raito is the one who never found the death note."

"Correct. This is why I believe that you are not completely Kira, Raito-kun. It doesn't matter **that** you found the death note – all that matters is that you stop using it, and dismiss the part of you that is Kira – the part of you who has a god complex." The small plate was set down, now empty, as Ryuzaki placed both hands on his knees, looking at Raito inquiringly. "I believe that side of you somehow evolved out of the knowledge that you could accomplish a godlike position with that notebook – even if you knew that the way there wouldn't be lawful."

"So you're saying I'm schizophrenic?" He asked, perplexed, eyes narrowed angrily at the detective, who dismissed his gaze without remorse, rising up to get a new treat from the tray, in the process turning his back to Raito.

"Not at all." He answered, in all simplicity, and Raito arched a brow, questioning even thought he raven-haired male couldn't see the look. "I'm merely stating you have two minds in one soul."

"Isn't that pretty much the same, though?"

Ryuzaki stopped up for a moment, turning back towards him while tilting his head slightly in thought. "No, I do not believe that. In opposition to schizophrenia – which is a psychosomatic ailment, where a particular human believes himself to be numerous individuals – what I am speaking about is more about one individual having two tracks of deliberation that are opposing each other, even though not intentionally."

"Opposing each other… you say?" He asked, frowning. How did that come together? Sure, if he thought about it, the way he had been after relinquishing his ownership of the death note was quite the contrary from the person he'd become over these last years, but where they opposites?

"Indeed. The Yagami Raito who didn't have the death note was indeed aiming to in a way rid the world of evil-doers, but," Ryuzaki sat down before continuing, "he was doing it in the way any other human would. He aimed on becoming a police officer, hoping to become one of the greater in the NPA-"

"Which I already am." He cut the detective off. "So I don't see your point in saying this."

"If you had allowed me to finish my thesis, Raito-kun, you would have seen my point." The raven-haired male sounded a little annoyed. "…As I was saying – a police officer. By catching criminals and putting them in jail – after a proper trial and a correct judgement. The Yagami Raito who **did** have the death note, is the one we know today as Kira, working as a police officer as a cover, while secretly passing out his own childlike sense of justice over whomever he sees fit."

"…You make it sound like I don't have a motive, Ryuzaki."

"I'm just stating the truth. People might follow Kira, seeing his actions as the correct way, but most are doing it out of fear, Raito-kun. Everyone wants to see someone dead once or twice in their life, but a world in fear of being killed for any little misstep they make – is that truly what you wished for?" The detective took a bite of the new piece of cake he had fetched, studying him indulgently while swallowing it. "The Raito-kun I thought I knew wouldn't have wanted that. Maybe he was a little too naïve and was too much of an idealist – but he was logical enough to understand that this sort of world isn't much better than it had been before – the only difference is that the one people are afraid of is the one calling himself the god of this world."

"… That was the Yagami Raito you **thought** you knew, Ryuzaki."

"Indeed it was." The other nodded soberly. "I hoped that there was a sliver of that persona in this Yagami Raito too, but your answer on my prior asked question states that there is no such penitence in the current Yagami Raito. That distresses me significantly." The prior asked question… oh, about the 'sacrifices'. Tsk.

"This world is almost entirely free of crimes, Ryuzaki. That should make people happy."

"Free of **crimes**, perhaps – but not free from the fear of getting hurt. People loathe criminals because they know that criminals have no maximum value of people to hurt with their actions. This isn't very much of a difference. You might have killed the criminals causing some people grief, but you have also caused grief for those who are left behind."

"…What do you mean with that?"

"How about this scenario? A man, age thirty-five, is in a lot of trouble with money – since he just lost his job – and cheats the tax company to get more in order to support himself. After that, he realizes he can gain more money in this way, and does it again, three times, four times, each time he gets the chance to. A friend finds out and he 'silences' the friend, by drowning him in a nearby river in panic. Would you kill him?"

"Obviously, yes." Raito frowned. "I don't see your point."

Ryuzaki swallowed another piece of cake before pointing the fork at Raito lazily. "Now let's see it from another point of view. He is unemployed, his wife is at home and sick, he has two daughters, age twelve and five. He also has his parents, who have been tricked by their annuity company, leaving them with nothing. So he does it not only to support himself, but also pay for his sick wife's medicine, his parent's living, as well as school and toys for his daughters, in order to keep them happy. The friend was threatening him by commanding him to give him two million American dollars for his silence, or he will kill his daughters."

Raito blinked. What the-?

Ryuzaki allowed him some time to think, continuing to eat the cake, before asking; "With that in mind, would you kill him?"

"…That is…" No, he shouldn't falter at this. "He still committed the crime."

"That he did – but for a good cause, isn't that true?" Ryuzaki glanced up at him through raven-black bangs. "Just as you are killing people for a 'good cause', Raito-kun. You are no different from him in this case. Also, if you think about it, the tax company could have tricked him first, or we could blame the annuity company, or the friend for threatening him."

"They didn't commit any crime-"

"How can you be sure? Without a proper trial after a **proper** investigation, you can get the answers to who is at fault." The plate was set down, once again empty. "Killing them as soon as media puts them up as criminals isn't as assuring – you can never be hundred percent certain that the person is guilty."

"People get sent to jail innocently too." He defended, but was frowning. He was falling behind, allowing the other a sort of advantage – and that wasn't good at all.

"Indeed – but if they are, then the mistake from the police can be corrected." The detective gave him a calm look. "Under normal circumstances, you cannot reawaken the dead."

He sat silent, returning the other's look just as calmly, but he didn't feel calm. He damned the other make for being able to make him falter in his own logic – he **knew** he was right and he **knew** he couldn't let Ryuzaki walk over him in this – or he might loose his own motive along the way. He had come far too long to lose here. "I won't quit, Ryuzaki." He said. "True, what you say does have logic, but the criminals also leave other people behind. By killing someone, they hurt that person's family."

"Which is why I'm saying that Kira is just like them, Raito-kun." Ryuzaki averted his eyes, to the window. "I'm not giving them more credit – I don't think any different about Kira than any other criminal. Neither is better, they are just the same. And as any other who has done the wrong thing, the correct thing to do is to repent for your sins."

"Spare me the spiritual talk, please." He rolled his eyes exasperatedly. This was getting on his nerves. This wasn't what he had come here to talk about. "Enough about it, I was the one asking questions, and we were still on the tenshi."

"…Have you not understood a thing of what we've discussed, Raito-kun?" Ryuzaki looked disconcerted. "This **is** connected to the tenshi… you could loose your life, quite futilely, if you keep this up."

"And if I don't?" He asked, narrowing his eyes while sitting up straight, leaving the almost relaxed pose he had held during the main time of the conversation. "If I do 'repent for my sins' and turn myself in, I will die – right? I'll be executed. So what is the difference? I'd rather die for something I believe in than throw it away because **you**, of all people, told me to."

"That's not what I was suggesting for you to do, Raito-kun." Ryuzaki defended, thumb between his teeth almost nervously.

"Then would you be so kind and tell me what you suggest that I do?" He gritted his teeth, rather sick and tired of the way this conversation was going. It wasn't getting him anywhere, and the other only left him with confusion and cryptic answer.

"What I'm trying to say is-"

After that, everything happened in a flash – literally.

As he had his back to the window, he could only see the clash of lightning lit up the dimly illuminated room only to be followed by a loud crash just zero point two seconds later. But that wasn't what caught his attention.

At the same moment as the lightning struck outside the window, the detective had cut his sentence short just as quickly as he had managed to pierce the skin of his thumb with a rather harsh bite. But Ryuzaki didn't seem to mention this as he stared, wide-eyed, at the window. And even from his distance, Raito could see the violent tremors that coursed through the other's body.

"…Ryuzaki?" He asked, slowly.

He got no response.

Raito frowned as he stood up, slowly, eyeing Jyiva carefully. The tenshi looked generally concerned, nothing more. What was going on here…? "Ryuzaki? Are you okay?" He tried, again, as he rounded the table. He saw blood slip from the detectives damaged thumb to stain his slacks, on occasion even the floor, as the raven-haired male's shaking didn't make matters better. "Hey… Ryuzaki?" Something was definitely off here…

He kneeled a little by the armchair, to get into eye-level with the other. Ryuzaki merely stared past him, as if not even noticing his presence. Okay, this was just getting stranger by the second. He contemplated putting a hand on the other's shoulder, but knew that in case the detective did react to that, it might be a rather violent reaction. And he most certainly didn't want to receive a kick to his head at this moment. He opened his mouth to try and reach the other with words again, when another clash of lightning struck outside.

The detective jerked back, shuddering more violently, while his breathing grew more ragged and shallow, eyes widened in what would… unmistakably be…

Fear.

And just that second, the answer struck him as the lightning outside.

Karaunophobia. Ryuzaki was afraid of the thunder. Actually, afraid wasn't the right word – he looked downright terrified. That would explain the abrupt reaction to the phenomenon. And he also knew that phobias could cause people severe problems, as panic attacks, respiratory arrest, fainting or a certain shocked state, that even could evolve into a trauma.

And he didn't really want to be forced to call an ambulance for a man that was supposed to be already dead. So, he had to think. What did you do to lessen someone's reaction to fear?

First thing first, get rid of the reason for the fear. Not that he could stop the thunder, but he could at least dispose of the lightning. He rose up hastily and went over to the windows, quickly finding the buttons for the electronic blind that the room was provided with. And so, in a matter of seconds, he had gotten rid of the lightning, at the very least,

"Hey, Ryuzaki." He trued, yet again, walking up to the armchair. "Hey."

Subconsciously now, he grabbed the other's shoulder loosely, taking notice in the continuous shudders that shook the other's frame, and gave a gentle shake.

He saw the other's eyes dilate slightly before the detective blinked, harshly, and looked up at him. He still looked afraid, and his breathing was continuously shallow. And somehow, even though the look of weakness the other was presenting would any other time be to his utter glee, he felt a sting of melancholy at the other's helpless look. For he looked so utterly, completely and undoubtedly...

Lonely. So very lonely.

Despite himself, he kneeled down a little, offering a small supportive smile as the other mumbled what sounded like a broken version of his name, and gave the other's shoulder a small squeeze. "There's nothing to be afraid of."

Additionally, which he hadn't noticed clearer ever before, he felt a small flutter of relief as the other's shudders subsided and the tenseness in the detective's shoulders loosened, even if only to a slight degree.

Moreover, at that moment he realized that, if he didn't watch out…

He would loose this battle – and the reason for his fear of that realization was that he wasn't even sure himself if that was a bad thing.

**AAAAAAAAAAND** **that's that xD hahaha.**

**Points for this chapter:**

**The names of the angel orders are pretty lame – I know. But please bear with me xD**

**Raito is a bit OOC here – I know. But hey, we need to have SOME OOC-ness in both of them to get this story going, in my opinion. Even so, L DID have a couple of years to figure these things out, while Raito ignored the small facts L tries to show him because he was so firm to believe in what he thought was right – and so he overlooked these small simple facts. As soon as he has gotten himself back on track, though – I promise he'll give L some challenge too **

**War between the tenshi and the shinigami – cliché? I don't know, I just brought up the idea to get some tension – will Raito risk his own live to continue his goal? And will a **real **war come along and what will happen then? I don't know xD We'll just have to see what my faithful reviewers think – ne?**

**Karaunophobia is one of four names for fright of thunder/lightning**

**Until next time then!**

**Keyhala**


	8. Chapter 8

**Warning:** **Both disclaimer and story include spoilers up to and including volume 7! After that, not even I know what happens, but if you haven't read volume 7, and don't want to know major spoilers – do NOT read. If you don't mind spoilers or have already read, then please go ahead **

**Chapter 8, Chapter 8, Chapter 8… yeah Hope it's to all your enjoyment **

**Disclaimer:** **I do not own Death Note or any of its Characters. If I did, L would never have died and There would've been a lot more yaoi laugh**

**Summary:** **In the year 2010, Kira's will has almost become the law. Raito has no more competition as the chief inspector of the NPA. Even if the role of 'L' was relinquished a year earlier, at the same time as Near and Mello got wiped from history, he has no problem, since he holds the entire police force of Japan, as well as well as the role of the worlds 'saviour', Kira. There are slight complications with the now upcoming discussions about disbanding the police, but he doesn't see it as a long-term problem.**

**Everything seems to be going fine, up until Friday the thirteenth of August, when something pretty unpredictable happens. One of the newly dead criminals, who got killed by Kira's judgement, suddenly reawakens on the hospital, three hours after her death. Shocked at this information, Raito decides to get information from the woman. But she has no memories of her life whatsoever, only her name, age and a cryptic phrase; "_Once is once – but everyone gains a second chance." _**

**Deciding to go home to think the entire situation over, he finds another shocking surprise waiting. For if a woman who has been dead can reawaken… then why couldn't also someone else?**

**Warnings:** **Yaoi (malexmale), Violence, Language**

**Well, with that in mind, why don't we get started? And my dears, please don't forget to review It would make a poor authoresses' day if you could take the time to write a decent review! Tell me what you think **

Chapter 8

"Raito-kun."

"Mhm?" He asked, slowly, readjusting the blinds again.

"May I have something to drink? My throat is feeling awfully dry." He looked over at the detective, narrowing his eyes slightly. There were still unmistaken shudders coursing through the lithe frame from time to time, and the wide-eyed look in the other's eyes hadn't lessened yet.

"No." He shook his head, walking away from the windows. "Since you still seem to be in a shock, giving you anything to drink wouldn't be a wise thing to do."

"How would you know if I was in a shock, Raito-kun?"

"I had my suspicions, but the fact that you didn't consider the risks yourself certainly proves it." There was a loud crack outside the building, and the detective jumped only slightly in his seat. "As said." He motioned with his hand to emphasize his point, before noting with a frown that the other's thumb was still bleeding.

He shook his head and cast a brief glance around, eyes locking on a small handkerchief on the tray. He swiftly strode over to the counter and picked it up, before returning to the raven-haired male. "You're bleeding." He explained, as Ryuzaki gave him a questioning look, while he kneeled slightly, taking the other's damaged hand. Daintily wrapping the handkerchief around the other's thumb, he tied it firmly to stop the bleeding. "See? That's why you should stop gnawing at it."

"…" He looked up at the other's face, arching a brow. "…Thank you, Raito-kun."

"Don't mention it." He stood up again, returning to his seat. "…Are you okay now?"

"…A little shaky, but I'll be fine." Ryuzaki huffed quietly. Raito nodded, slowly, not letting the small smirk he wore show. Now that the surprise had passed, he could think more rationally about all of this.

"So, Karaunophobia, hm?" He asked, and couldn't really hide his amusement. Ryuzaki narrowed his eyes slightly.

"I do not think my phobia is a laughable matter, Raito-kun."

"But why are you afraid of the thunder?"

"I'm not." Raito arched a brow. "Personally, I know – by a fact – that there is only a zero point four percent chance of me being hurt by the phenomenon known as lightning, but my body reacts reflexively against it in an act of protection. No matter what logic you put into it, I cannot do anything against the reflexive reactions of my body, Raito-kun."

"So, **you** are not afraid, but your body is?"

"It's a highly subconscious fear, at the very least." The raven-haired male frowned at his bandaged hand before placing it on his knee, lifting the other to his mouth, nipping the undamaged thumb softly. Raito wondered, with a slight hint of amusement, how long it would take before the detective caused it to bleed as well. While the detective now fell silent, Raito looked over at the tenshi. Jyiva looked back, calmly, not saying a word.

It was true he still had things to ask, but with this weather and the late hour – it was already good past twelve – it might be the wisest choice to call it a night. On the other hand... He sent an almost invisible glance back at the detective, seeing him flinch, sharply, at another crash of thunder that caused slight reverberations in the building's frame. The thunderstorm had to be almost straight above the city now.

It wouldn't be wise leaving the other alone at this time. Sure, Ryuzaki wouldn't be alone as the tenshi would be there too… but would the seraphim know what to do? Based on his earlier actions – or lack thereof – it didn't really seem that the tenshi knew – or cared – about the situation at hand. He looked at the detective, wondering if the tremors where of fear or of cold.

"Are you cold, Ryuzaki?"

"…A little."

"Just as I thought. That would be the natural reaction of the shock. You'd better keep warm." He glanced at the other's bare feet sceptically. In the entire time he had known the detective, he had never once seen him wear socks. So he thought he had a good assumption in believing the other simply didn't own a single pair of the article of clothing. "So the best would be if you either put on something warmer, or simply went to bed."

"I sleep approximately one hour a night, Raito-kun, at best. I wouldn't be able to sleep even if I wished to at this time." Ryuzaki pointed out drearily.

"I never told you to sleep. Just to keep warm. Use your proficient logic to figure out the rest." He rolled his eyes – for being a genius, the raven-haired male was rather stupid.

"…" Ryuzaki glanced at him, nipping his thumb again, eyes flicking hastily to the concealed windows as another crash was heard outside them. "It would be rude to not be able to answer your questions because of a natural phenomenon, Raito-kun."

"I figured that I could ask you more questions on another occasion, Ryuzaki. I **also** figured that at this instant, your mental health seems to be a higher priority."

"I won't go insane because of the thunder, Raito-kun. That's a very illogical statement."

Not more insane than he already was. Raito forced out a small smile, holding back the bitter chuckle that threatened to break through. "You could go into a deep trauma because of it, though. It doesn't matter how illogical it may seem – you **do** have Karaunophobia, and without trying to use any means possible against the apparent shock your system has gone through, you might as well suffer-…"

"-A cardiac arrest. Isn't that right?" Ryuzaki was standing up, a little shakily. "Ironic, isn't it?" He walked over to the kitchen area again, unceremonially plucking a strawberry from another piece of cake and swiftly biting down on it, splitting it in half. "That my phobia can cause me to fall victim to what has already killed me once." Dark eyes turned to meet his again, and Raito could see from those eyes that the fear had vanished, replaced with that firm look he was used to see.

"Life is full of irony, Ryuzaki."

"I'm pretty assured that most people in this world know of that." Ryuzaki shrugged, devouring the last of the strawberry. "But I am most certainly fine now, Raito-kun, hones-"

"Don't mess with me!" He growled, efficiently cutting the other off. "You are **not** fine. You might hide it behind that stoic exterior of yours, but if you really suffer from Karaunophobia, you most likely aren't fine after only five minutes."

Ryuzaki seemed to hesitate for a second, but huffed. "I **will** be fine, Raito-kun."

"No, you won't. Don't try to mislead me, Ryuzaki." He stood up, crossing his arms over his chest. "If I pull away those blinds, I **know** you won't be fine within the next minute, as there is a ninety-five percent chance of a clash of thunder in that time. You jump as soon as you **hear** it."

"…It's true that I am feeling affected by my phobia, Raito-kun. However, I do not wish to be rude and force you to save your questions for the next occasion that we meet."

"And it would be rude of me to force you to answer my questions when you're being affected by your phobia."

"… That's a situation where I, had we been playing chess, would say stalemate, Raito-kun." Ryuzaki had an amused tone in his voice, having turned his back to him in order to fetch another strawberry, and as he turned back, his voice was slightly muffled by it as he chewed. "With that in mind, the most logical thing to do would be to reach some sort of compromise."

"So it would seem." He replied, before glancing towards Jyiva. "My questions are mostly regarding Jyiva, so I might as well ask him about those, which would give you the opportunity to rest a little. Even though your sleeping schedule is that irregular, at this point in time it would be wise to allow your body to restore the, heavily increased, loss of energy it has gone through."

"You say 'mostly regarding Jyiva', meaning you have some unanswered questions for me, as well." He looked back towards the detective, seeing him frown softly. "Maybe we should take them first. After that, you can ask Jyiva whatever you like. I have no obligation as to what he will tell you or not." The raven-haired male blinked down at the tray, as if for the first time noticing something, before reaching out and picking up a small slice of kiwi from a cake. He took the fruit between his teeth and bit through, chewing before going through the same procedure again. After finished, he licked off some whipped cream from his index finger before speaking up again. "Does that suit your fancies?"

Blinking harshly, Raito looked up to meet the other's eyes, utterly annoyed with himself. Had he been watching the other's lips right now? What the hell-… "Sure."

** DeathNote **

And somehow, he ended up in front of one of five computer screens that were present in the bedroom of the hotel suite. "Okay… so how does this answer my question, Ryuzaki?"

"It's rather simple, Raito-kun." Ryuzaki explained, typing something on the keyboard, windows opening and closing rapidly on the screen. "You wished to know how I could overlook the activities in the NPA building, when it would have been impossible for me to enter because of the tight security."

"Yes, that's true."

"I do think you should remember the burglary the NPA encountered two years ago."

"I do remember." He still didn't see where this was going, and he couldn't see exactly what the other was working on with the computer.

"After that incident, the government decided to have special security systems if another situation like that would occur." Black eyes where tightly fixed on the screen while the other spoke. "A security system that would only engage when someone entered a room while the alarm was set, sending a silent signal to the local authorities outside the NPA while also…"

He suddenly realized what the other was aiming at. "…While also taping records from the room, or rooms, which were entered. To minimize the cost for this, they installed the cameras so that they wouldn't tape unless the alarm was activated. And that would be when someone enters a locked room or department, which occurs as soon as someone leaves, as we lock the doors with electronic keys."

"Correct." The detective nodded, pressing the return key swiftly. Four panels appeared on the screen. "Welcome to your office, Raito-kun." Raito blinked, and inched closer, the computer chair creaking a little.

It was, indeed, his office. "So you mean to tell me you hacked into our security system and that you can engage the cameras into monitoring the room whenever you wish?"

"Correct." A nod of the other's head caused him to look at the detective instead. "Does this information surprise you?"

"Not entirely." He admitted, leaning back into his seat again, eyeing the other leisurely. "Not since it's you. I would be alarmed that our security was easy to breach, but on the contrary, I'm more mildly amused. It's very alike you, Ryuzaki."

"You speak on a very personal level at the moment, Raito-kun." The detective noted, while glancing over at him, thumb between his teeth. "Should I be alarmed?"

"I don't understand what you're saying."

"Up until now, everything – or rather, most of the things – which you've said has had something to do with you wanting to gain information. And now suddenly you analyze my personal behaviour and admit that you're feeling 'mildly amused' by it. Or am I reading too much into it?"

"I was just stating something that crossed my mind, that's all. You act very careful, yet you never hesitate to challenge. You're quite contradictory in that sense. You wish for everything to be as secure and safe as possible, while also rushing heedlessly into situations."

"As I did four years ago. I guess that was what you pointed at, Raito-kun." A sense of ironic agony was present in the other's calm voice, eyes narrowing slightly. "Although I have to say that we are, actually, quite alike in that reckless way of action. As far as I remember, it was you who in all your hurry wrote down Lind L. Tailor's name in your death note as soon as you saw him."

"That was a one-time mistake."

"…Or the time when you sent me taunting messages, passed on through your victims."

"That was my personal challenge."

"And when you killed Naomi Misora?"

"She knew too much."

"Still, it was reckless."

He leaned against the desk leisurely, chin leaning on the back of his hand as he eyed the detective. "Indeed it was. But it was also half the amusement – doing reckless things, daring to challenge. The fact that it was, indeed, dangerous for my own self only excited me more."

"So it was all a game?"

"I always thought you should mix enjoyment with work. I got rid of the criminals and evildoers of this world, while keeping myself entertained with it." Ryuzaki frowned at him, looking generally concerned. "Does that bother you?"

"You didn't include the innocent that died because of your actions." Black eyes flicked to the screen, as the detective set to close the panels. "Nor did you include the ones who died because they were opposing you."

"The good of this world requires some sacrifices, Ryuzaki. And about those who went against me… I believe that you, too, know how it is to want to reach something so badly you'd do anything to achieve it – isn't that correct?"

The raven-haired male just gave him a long stare before reaching one hand out, turning of the monitor to leave the room in almost complete darkness. Raito blinked three times in order to accustom the dim lightning and followed the detective's back with his eyes as he walked over to the door and opened it, letting in some of the faint light from the living room area. "The thunder seems to have calmed down." The proclamation was soft, almost pondering, and Raito understood that Ryuzaki wasn't really talking about the same topic he was thinking about.

"It would seem that way." He answered, rising up and following the older male. He glanced around the living room area, frowning in annoyance. "And it does seem that Jyiva isn't present."

"He probably returned to heaven." Ryuzaki shrugged. "He has no obligations to stay here… or rather, no right. Tenshi aren't supposed to be on earth, since they abandoned it. The only ones who know of him being present on earth are you, me and your shinigami. And that way it would better stay. We don't want any more unnecessary conflicts…" Ryuzaki stopped by one of the windows, pulling away the blinds with the manually controlled panel, looking out towards the lively Tokyo night.

Raito watched him for a moment. Something was still generally bugging him. If Ryuzaki wasn't here to give out his identity to the police, nor kill him – what was his purpose in throwing away his only chance to heaven to return? It didn't fit into any logical explanation. He sighed softly. "Conflicts are inevitable, Ryuzaki. Even if crime rates are down to an absolute minimum, conflicts still occur, even if they aren't as severe as the ones we had before my reign-" Black eyes snapped up in the window to meet his in the reflection, and Raito saw something he wasn't used to see in those eyes – rage.

"Do **not** say something like that, Raito-kun." Even if he held a calm, almost polite tone, the brunet could hear that it was laced with anger. "One of many things I've come to understand about you besides your twisted view of justice is your skewed opinion about yourself. You don't **reign** this world. You're not a god, whatever media or the government says."

"It's the view of the world-"

"It's the view you believe the world has. One identity once made up by the anonymous source of the internet and now spread over the world – it's not a fact. Like people who believe in the Christian religion believe that Jesus Christ was god's son, you believe to be god. But do you know one thing, Raito-kun?" Those deep eyes narrowed further. "In the end, you're only human. Destined to die and be forgotten. That's all there is to it. Once Kira disappears, the crimes will start again. And all those human beings sacrificing happiness and their lives for your 'justice' have done so in vain."

"…" He didn't answer, just leaned against the back of the sofa, crossing his arms over his chest again, watching the other's gaze shift away in the window, staring vacantly off into the cloudy night. How did the other manage to shove him down in every argument? Of course, he didn't hold any objections towards the other's persistent logic and quick wits, but he had always been a step before, or on the same level as the detective had. What had changed? Had he changed? Or had L? Or perhaps both?

It wasn't news that he had been very bored the last year. Perhaps he had relaxed too much? And Ryuzaki had found out in his last seconds that he had been right and that his primes suspect was indeed the perpetrator. So it wouldn't be wrong to think that the detective had been able to mull over the situation from very different point of views these four years, while he had probably been too relaxed for his own good. He had to do something against that… but the other was so far ahead now… he needed something to throw the other of guard.

"You are also merely human, L." Ryuzaki blinked, turning his head. Raito smirked softly. "You were also destined to die, the date just changed while my rules developed into becoming the rules of this world. Despite fear, people have come to accept it. The innocent live their full life, the ones straying onto the path of evildoers die by my judgement. Once you're dead, you're dead. You just don't seem to have understood that yet. What have you achieved by returning? What do you **plan** on achieving by reviving criminals without their memories? What is your plan of being here with your borrowed time, Ryuzaki?"

"…I plan on making you realize your mistakes." The answer was calm, despite the look of surprise the other had held a minute ago. "Even if the chance of you understanding and admitting them has dropped with the devastating reduction of your sense of morality, it is the only thing I'm here for."

"So you're giving up heaven and a perfectly peaceful world just to win?" Another blink. "Are you that sore of a loser? Can't you just accept that my way is the one that won? The one that set the new sense of justice in this world?"

"I can't accept that this oppression is what is believed to be a righteous world. For it is not." Ryuzaki sighed. "People die because of simple mistakes, missteps. Perhaps even unjustly because of someone **else's** mistakes. You're not making this world better, Raito-kun. You're causing fear and oppression. The only thing that has changed is the outward façade of this world. But who are you going to show it to? Yourself? For I would say that you are the only one to believe this is a fair world."

"The world isn't fair, Ryuzaki. It will never be." He closed his eyes. "Everything is unfair. That's why someone **has** to set the rules; someone has to decide what's right and wrong, and take a course of action for those beliefs."

"So you will die, believing in an illusion."

"I will die believing in the fact that I have made it a change to the better."

"Who decides what is good?"

He blinked. Well… "…"

"I know your answer without you speaking." The detective turned to him, frowning. "You just thought that the one deciding the meaning of good and evil is you. Since you're the self-proclaimed god of this world."

"…We're just walking around in circles with these discussions." Raito said, calmly. "It's like it had been all those years, people debating whether or not the death penalty was accepted. No one debates about that nowadays. But that's how we are going. Around and around, never coming to a conclusion. We have different views, Ryuzaki, and yours are older than the day you died."

"And yours are older than the Roman Empire, if you think of it that way, Raito-kun." Ryuzaki walked past him, heading for the tray of sweets. "They also wished to rule the world."

"They never succeeded."

"And neither have you." The detective took two cubes of sugar and leisurely dropped them into his mouth, allowing them to dissolve, slowly. "You hide behind your Kira façade. No one knows your true identity. Had they known, I'm eighty-four percent sure they wouldn't support your ways as blindly – especially not when they realize they have been following what was a seventeen-year-old boy's ideals for these years."

"Like the police getting to know that they have followed a teenager as head detective?"

"…" L glanced at him, biting down on one of the sugar cubes in his mouth with a soft crushing sound. "Teenager?"

"…Yes?" He suddenly hesitated, at the plain look of inquisition on the other's face. Then, Ryuzaki laughed.

The sound was crystal clear, and Raito found the sound rather enjoyable in comparison to the almost tedious tone of the other's voice. The uncontrollable sounds of laughter sounded almost natural… human. It startled him to hear such a sound from the raven-haired male. "What is so funny?"

Ryuzaki took another ten seconds to stop laughing, wiping a small tear from one eye as he looked back up. "I suspected people did misjudge my age, but to actually hear it, from your lips notherless…"

"…So you're older than that?" He asked, forcing his voice to keep steady in order to not stammer.

"Older than a teenager? Indeed I am."

"Okay… how much older?"

"Old enough." A small smile played on the other's lips.

"Seriously. Which year are you born?" He was growing annoyed, and the detective seemed to notice.

"Nineteen seventy-nine, Raito-kun. October thirty-first, Nineteen seventy-nine." He saw opaque eyes sparkle with a rare hint of amusement as his own eyes widened. Nineteen seventy-nine… and he died in November Two-thousand and six… That would mean…

"You- You where…" He gaped.

"Twenty-seven. Correct." Ryuzaki grinned. "Did you honestly believe that the world's top detective would be your age? I had been solving cases for more than ten years before I started on the Kira case, Raito-kun." Raito blinked, dumbfounded.

Twenty-seven. After being dead for four years, the detective was still three years older than he was. He had been seven years older than him from the start. That was shocking, to say the least. He wondered if this would change his view of the detective.

He glanced at Ryuzaki, who was going through the tray. "Want some, Raito-kun?" He asked, holding up a piece of chocolate cake. Raito's eyebrow twitched slightly.

Nope, he definitively behaved just as childish as he had before. "No, thank you… I'll be fine."

He just wished to know if he could say that he was the same as he had been before, too.

**And that's chapter eight! I sincerely thank you for all the wonderful reviews They make me VERY VERY happy **

**/Keyhala**


	9. Chapter 9

**Warning:** **Both disclaimer and story include spoilers up to and including volume 7! After that, not even I know what happens, but if you haven't read volume 7, and don't want to know major spoilers – do NOT read. If you don't mind spoilers or have already read, then please go ahead **

**Disclaimer:** **I do not own Death Note or any of its Characters. If I did, L would never have died and There would've been a lot more yaoi laugh**

**Summary:** **In the year 2010, Kira's will has almost become the law. Raito has no more competition as the chief inspector of the NPA. Even if the role of 'L' was relinquished a year earlier, at the same time as Near and Mello got wiped from history, he has no problem, since he holds the entire police force of Japan, as well as well as the role of the worlds 'saviour', Kira. There are slight complications with the now upcoming discussions about disbanding the police, but he doesn't see it as a long-term problem.**

**Everything seems to be going fine, up until Friday the thirteenth of August, when something pretty unpredictable happens. One of the newly dead criminals, who got killed by Kira's judgement, suddenly reawakens on the hospital, three hours after her death. Shocked at this information, Raito decides to get information from the woman. But she has no memories of her life whatsoever, only her name, age and a cryptic phrase; "_Once is once – but everyone gains a second chance." _**

**Deciding to go home to think the entire situation over, he finds another shocking surprise waiting. For if a woman who has been dead can reawaken… then why couldn't also someone else?**

**Warnings:** **Yaoi (malexmale), Violence, Language**

**Well, with that in mind, why don't we get started? And my dears, please don't forget to review It would make a poor authoresses' day if you could take the time to write a decent review! Tell me what you think **

Chapter 9

"Twenty-seven, huh?" Raito glared over his shoulder at the shinigami, as Ryuk had mentioned that very phrase already four times before today. "Who would've thought it?"

"Apparently I wouldn't have thought it, at least." Raito grumbled, eyes narrowing further. He still hadn't gotten over his misstep. It had felt embarrassing to know that he had let his assumption get the better of him. And even more to have let his nemesis know of the fact that he had been that mistaken. It left him, to say the least, quite annoyed. Somehow, the entire incident had made him feel stupid. It was a very unfamiliar feeling, and just as irritating.

"But still, he looks a lot younger than he is… I can't blame you for being mistaken…" Ryuk continued, but something in his voice – and the additional chuckle – made him think that the shinigami actually found it greatly amusing to mention that Yagami Raito had been wrong.

"If you mention anything about his age or me being wrong **one more time**, Ryuk, I'll make sure you won't have apples for a week." He threatened, glaring as he stepped out of the house, locking the door. It was a fairly nice day, a few clouds, but a comfortable temperature and no rain. And yet, he was in a bad mood. All because of the stupid shinigami.

Just grand…

"!" Ryuk blinked, eyes widening. "Heeeeeey, that's no way to go treat others because **you** were wrong for a change, Raito. After all, **you** where the one wrong about his-"

"**Not another word!**" He hissed, walking down the pathway and out on the street. Maybe he should walk today. After all, he was one hour early. Also because of the stupid shinigami. He really felt like blaming everything on Ryuk now, and he felt justified in doing so.

And, believe it or not, the shinigami did shut his mouth. It was unbelievable, even if relieving. Well, at least now he was even surer that the apples meant more than anything else for Ryuk. And that was a good thing to keep in mind. A very good thing to keep in mind indeed… At least if he intended to live long enough. And he fully intended on that.

Okay, so **after** that embarrassing incident with the age thing, the conversations had, in less of better words, died. He had taken another cup of coffee while watching the detective carefreely devouring the piece of chocolate cake he had picked out. When Jyiva didn't return in the fifteen minutes that had followed, he had excused himself and left. Ryuzaki had kindly offered to pay for a taxi, but he had waved it off. He ended up taking the subway.

His weekend had followed with Ryuk learning of the entire conversation – and of course the shinigami hadn't been able to stop laughing at it – and constantly bugging him about his shameful mistake.

That was basically all. But he was about ninety-eight percent sure that today wasn't going to be a good day. First of all, he **knew** Matsuda would be bothering him. **Again**. Secondly, Hanaya, or some other stupid woman at the office, would most likely hit on him. **Again**. Only because it was Monday. Matsuda would be asking if he had gotten anything done during the weekend, and if the answer was no, then **why** he hadn't done anything. And the women were all hoping he had somehow gotten insane from lack of company at home.

Either that - or they thought that all men were suffering from a horrible disease which caused them to forget that they weren't looking for company if they hadn't gotten laid in a certain amount of time. That might be true for many human beings of the male gender – but certainly not Yagami Raito. To him, it was complete foolishness.

In all – it was something he utterly ridiculed. But it annoyed him nevertheless. He had no interest in a female companionship – or any companionship at all for that matter – at the moment. So it wouldn't matter how they all dressed up or acted. With their lack of discipline and utter foolishness they only caused him to grow a certain loathing against them.

The same sort of loathing he had had for Misa's entire personality. Too easily manipulated and too driven by personal desires. No one who acted like that would ever be able to change anything in this world. They all ended up the same – poor pitiful creatures with broken hopes and trashed dreams. And those pitiful creatures were of no use for him. The only reason for Misa's usability was her pitiful love for him and her shinigami eyes. Nothing more.

"Game and set! Six to two!" He glanced up at a sudden shout, finding that the source of it had been the tennis court across the street. He stopped up for a second. Tennis certainly brought back some memories… He snorted softly, shrugging as he turned to walk on.

After all, the last time he had played had been against-

"Hey, Ryuzaki-kun, wanna go for another set?" He blinked, halting his movement. He looked over his shoulder, but he wasn't able to see the tennis court through the bushes. It was just a coincidence, he figured. A trick of his mind, and a bad timing that he had been thinking of the detective just as that name was uttered-

"Since this was my sixth straight set won, Yamamoto-san, your odds of winning just dropped to a mere four percent." Raito narrowed his eyes. No doubt about it…

"Oi, Raito, what are you-?" He heard Ryuk question, but didn't mention it as he had already turned and was about to cross the street. He could hear the one called Yamamoto laugh.

"That's true. You're an incredible player. Ever thought of entering a competition?"

"I'm very sorry to say that my life isn't exactly suited for that sort of activity, but I take great pleasure in these small occasions when I get time to-" Jet black eyes looked up just as Raito closed the gate to the court, the detective cutting his sentence short. The detective's eyes blinked once, and an immediate hint of recognition flickered in them. "-…Raito-kun."

"Never thought I'd see you in this part of town, Ryuzaki." He said, calmly, looking at the other two players. The one who had abruptly stopped laughing when he entered had to be Yamamoto. He guessed the man was in his mid-thirties. However, the thorn his self-confidence in knowing people's ages had gotten, he couldn't bet on it.

"I was just asked to play here by Yamamoto-san, since Ikanashi-san has a long way to go to the court closer to the hotel." Ryuzaki answered, looking patiently at him. "That is all."

So, the second man had to be Ikanashi. He looked slightly younger than Yamamoto, but still… thirty, thirty-two at best. And by the looks of them, he could almost be sure they didn't work with anything all too important. So he dismissed them quite coldly, looking back at the detective. "I see." He took a few steps closer, and saw Ryuzaki's eyes flicker slightly as Ryuk followed. So apparently the other hadn't really grown accustomed to seeing the dark creature follow him.

"So what are you doing here at this early hour, Raito-kun?" The raven-haired male followed with. "If I remember correctly, you usually don't leave for the office until in an hour."

"I just figured I could come in early and get some serious work done before Matsuda arrives." And before the detective could overlook his work. He had figured the detective knew his schedule, and probably would start watching him at that time. And the slightly narrowed look the other gave him showed that Ryuzaki understood why, as well.

However, when he spoke, the detective didn't let it show. "Well, that sounds wise. Matsuda has always been talking too much for one to concentrate." The two other males where watching silently, a slight look of confusion on their faces. Just as Raito was to speak up again, the one named Yamamoto broke in.

"I recognize you from somewhere…" Raito glanced at him calmly.

"I'm assured you do." He answered, with a certain chill to his tone. The man didn't seem to take notice of it, even if Ryuzaki gave him a somewhat scathing look. Stupid people.

"Raito-kun works at the NPA." Ryuzaki said, looking back at Yamamoto. "You might have recognized him from the latest news debates about the police and the possibility of the police force being cut down."

"Oh, yeah, I see now." Ikanashi chimed in, suddenly looking like he had found the solution to all the world's problems. "Yagami Raito, right?"

"…Right." He said, trying to conceal his disgust to the simplicity of the other man. And he couldn't understand the reason to which Ryuzaki would associate with people like these. They were far below his level. So **why**? It made him angry, or rather, annoyed. Why would the detective waste his time with simple people like these when he would only waste his own intellect on them?

"So how do you know him, Ryuzaki-kun?" L glanced at Yamamoto, blinking once. Raito scowled a little. Of course the detective couldn't say that he knew him from working on a case…

"We've worked together one time." Ryuzaki said, simply. "And we attended To-Ou University together."

"…Ah, so that's how it is…" the two men nodded, as if this was the most logical thing in the world. Raito was struck with how dumb they were. They didn't even ask about how or when they worked together – they just accepted it? Just how stupid where they?

This just made him question even more why Ryuzaki would bother with them. "Also, we played tennis together once." He blinked, glancing at the detective with a frown. What did that have to do with anything…?

Unless….

"So he plays tennis too?" Ikanashi asked. "Hey, Yagami-kun, would you like to play a set or two?"

Of course… He gave the detective a small glare, only replied with a small smile. "I'm not so sure that'll work, I do not have any clothes, for a first-"

"-Which reminds me…" Ryuzaki cut in, walking over to the side of the court, picking up a small bag. "I brought the clothes I borrowed, Raito-kun. I was planning on giving them to you **after** you finished work, but now you're here…"

He narrowed his eyes further at the barely-concealed smile on the other's face. He knew that he now really didn't have a reason to not play, since Ryuzaki was doing fine in baggy jeans and sweatshirt. The detective had it all thought out, hadn't he? The reason for playing here didn't have much to do with Ikanashi, he guessed. "Still, I have to head for the office…"

"Not in another fifty-two minutes and forty seconds, Raito-kun."

That was when he realized he had walked straight into a trap. "…You have this perfectly planned out, haven't you?" He asked, but he knew the other was going to deny it.

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Raito-kun. After all, I can't decide people's actions." He heard Ryuk laugh behind him, and he narrowed his eyes, before closing them and absently pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Okay… fine. One set. No more." He could see the detective show the smile, no longer concealing it.

"Thank you, Raito-kun." He said, handing him the bag. "If you want, you can change in the locker room, it should still be open."

He snorted and took the bad, giving the raven-haired male a scathing look.

He was going to get the detective back for this, for sure.

** DeathNote **

"Game count, Six to five!" Raito wiped his forehead and glared at Ikanashi, who was yet again shouting out the count abnormally loudly. As if they couldn't count for themselves.

"Are you tired, Raito-kun?" Ryuzaki asked, receiving the ball from Yamamoto.

"I haven't played in quite some while, I must be a bit rusty." He answered, grumbling.

"Yes, your reactions are a little slower than they used to be." Ryuzaki admitted. "New Game."

"…" Raito glanced at the scoring board for a second. If Ryuzaki won this game, he'd win with seven to five. However, if **he** won, they'd go six all – and have to play a tiebreak game. And he wasn't sure he'd have time for that. Even so… to just give up and **lose** against Ryuzaki, of all people… He looked back at the detective. It wouldn't be a good thing. He would try his best for this.

Definitely.

** DeathNote **

"Deuce." Four to four. Raito knew. He had been lucky, since Ryuzaki had an advantage just the game point before. If he could just win two points now, they'd go to a tie…

He was a little slow, he realized as the other served. He took a quick step to the right, but felt that it wouldn't be enough, even if he hit. Sure enough, he hit the ball, but with the amount of lost force he had had, the ball grazed the net, over to the other's court. And he knew what was next, as Ryuzaki took a step forward. As the detective hit, the ball rocketed back to his court, and he desperately tried to hit it to no avail.

"Dead net." He said, while shaking his head. He heard Ryuzaki say something to Ikanashi, but couldn't hear what.

He sighed, but looked up again as Yamamoto returned the ball to Ryuzaki. "Advantage." Again. This was getting ridiculous. And the time was passing, all too fast. But he couldn't afford to lose.

He was better prepared this time, and sent the ball back with a lot more accuracy, allowing a lesser chance for the other to smash again. For he knew of the other's tennis abilities, and also that the other was in better condition for it, however that now was possible. Perhaps because Ryuzaki was used to playing in his usual clothes while Raito had more problems playing in jeans? Could be, but he wouldn't say it.

He returned another time, moving to the left and waiting for the other's move. As predicted, Ryuzaki had been forced to hit it towards Raito's left. He allowed himself to go a step closer to the net, creating some intimidation as the other knew that if he got a clear shot he'd smash. He couldn't this time, and sent it back to Ryuzaki, who backed one step. He smirked. Perfect.

However… He blinked, as Ryuzaki suddenly looked up at him, challenging, and…

Jumped.

He could only blink as the detective apparently risked it on this shot, as a jump was never good if you got a return on it. However, he now understood why Ryuzaki had taken a step back. He would have a better line for a shot to…

The right. It clicked just as the other's racket made contact with the ball. No – way! He took a quick step back and to the right. The other had turned it against him. He saw two things. The ball approaching, and the detective crouching slightly for the land.

His step back hadn't been wise.

The ball hit closer to the net on his side than he had predicted, and due to the angle of the shot, it went higher in the air than it would usually. He grit his teeth and jumped, feeling the ball graze his racket –

- Before it hit the steel net of the court just behind his shoulder. He landed again, parrying with a slight crouch of his legs, sighing heavily as he looked over his shoulder. What a pain.

"Game and set! Seven games to five!" Ikanashi announced, and he really felt like asking for the man's first name. He had just won a sure place in a certain black notebook.

"Great game." Yamamoto exclaimed, having picked the ball up. "Great game indeed."

"Hmph." Raito snorted, returning the man's racket to him before looking towards Ryuzaki, who was speaking with Ikanashi. He walked over to them, and the detective silenced, looking at him. "Good game." He extended his hand in a sign of good sportsmanship, even if his smile was slightly strained.

"Indeed it was." Ryuzaki nodded, taking his hand shortly. "It seems as if you still have five minutes before you should be leaving for the office."

"We made it in time." Was the other trying to see if he had lost on purpose? He shrugged. "I'll go change…" He left the three of them and went on to the locker room. He grimaced slightly as he realized he didn't have a towel. He'd have to use the showers at the NPA later on… Stupid tennis game… He shook his head and changed, frowning again.

As he left the locker room again, both bag and briefcase in hand, he glanced over at the three again. Ikanashi was chatting without much stop, and Yamamoto chimed in with comments now and then. He couldn't hear them, but they sounded awfully cheerful. Ryuzaki was watching them, on occasion nodding to affirm something.

But that wasn't what bothered him with the scene.

It was the fact that the detective smiled. He **smiled** at the other two conversing. They weren't even speaking completely coherent. They were just simple folks without much wit or knowledge for that matter.

A little like Matsuda.

So why!? Without himself even noticing, he had stalked over to the three, and Ryuzaki looked at him, seeming a little surprised. "Shouldn't you be heading for the office, Raito-kun?"

"…" He had to think, quickly. He had to ask the detective **what** was so interesting with these two, without them being present. "…Would you accompany me?"

"Pardon?"

"It would be nice to have someone to talk to on the way, if you don't mind?" He gave a small smile, trying to not seem strained or in any way stressed. Ikanashi and Yamamoto watched silently, the latter blinking once.

"If you so wish, then I'll be glad to." Ryuzaki gave a small nod. "Ikanashi-san, Yamamoto-san, I'll play with you again some other time."

"Sure thing." Ikanashi nodded, grinning. "It's always nice playing with you, Ryuzaki-kun."

Raito turned away, grimacing. Such… pitiful creatures. This world was full of them. No reason to get rid of them, but they annoyed him. Was this world only consistent of idiots and criminals? It almost seemed that way. Oh, he was really easily annoyed these days.

And the reason for that strange annoyance had just finished packing his things, and was now present at his side on the way out. "So, Raito-kun, are you trying to show up a friendly appearance or was there actually a real reason for you to ask me to accompany you?"

Okay, so he had been transparent. Fine. "I was merely bothered by the way you interacted with them."

"How so?" A hint of amusement was present in the other's voice, but it was so slight that Raito almost missed it.

"They are in no way near your level of intelligence, and yet you seem to enjoy a conversation with them, why?"

"…" Jet black eyes looked at him from under equally dark bangs. "You must understand, Raito-kun, that during my entire original lifetime, I was surrounded by brilliant minds such as ours, and the only topic I ever casually discussed always had some connection to a case or an unsolved mystery or puzzle."

"I figured that much." He said, frowning. "But isn't your intellect wasted on such simple minds as theirs?"

"Actually, it's funny you'd say that." Raito arched a brow, urging the other to continue as they walked down the otherwise empty street. "Seeing as most people in this world don't have our brilliant intellect, it should seem that we question their interests. However, to them, we are equally puzzling. Why people with our level of intelligence would never comprehend the simple amusement of a video game, for example."

"I used to play video games." He stated. "So I don't see your point."

"Did you really **play** video games, Raito-kun?" Ryuzaki smiled softly. "I tried it once, but quit when I realized I couldn't play it the way it should be played. I constantly solved the game, knew every twist and turn it would take, after less than half an hour. I understood everything you were supposed to do at a simple glance, and in the end just analyzed the way it could have been improved when concerning graphics, music or programming. I couldn't at all realize as to why people found them amusing – as they were so simple."

"Well, they aren't hard, at least…"

"Not to us, no. And that's the point, Raito-kun." Ryuzaki stopped for a red light, and Raito gave him a sceptical look. "To them, they are hard, puzzling, and amazing in the aspects of graphic and programming. Because they don't try and go deeper. They don't have the natural urge to break everything down into small pieces and realize the entirety. They just play it. Taking each challenge one at a time, puzzling over them, and trying to defeat them with their own power."

"Their pitiful if they have to use their entire brainpower to decipher those puzzles."

"No, they aren't. We are the same." Raito blinked, and the light switched to green. "We also seek challenges. However, since we are, in fact, smarter than other people, we need something more challenging than a simple video game. Like finding the cure for cancer, or find out if there is life on other planned with advanced technology. But underneath intelligence, we're the same. We wish to defeat the challenges we give ourselves. We wish to conquer the problems and stand victorious."

"…I never thought about that…" Raito hummed, accepting the theory to a degree. But he still didn't understand. "But what has that to do with you interacting with those two?"

"Because it was by interacting with Ikanashi-san and Yamamoto-san that I realized these facts, Raito-kun. And I promise you, even if I so had studied human nature with all those brilliant minds, I wouldn't have gotten to know that. We are too smart to realize that without comparing ourselves to other human beings, putting aside all thoughts of social standards and intellect." Ryuzaki gave him a smirk. "It's quite the same way that the police back in the 20th century tried to find the criminals. They used the help of specialists, and ordinary officers together, and tried to see it from the criminal's point of view. From the investigation they could find out the correct profile for the criminal."

"They added the thought pattern of the criminal after breaking him down to any other human, is that so?" It puzzled him, how the other surprised him with these sorts of things.

"Indeed. From that point, they could realize what natural human urges were used, and also then break out the special features of the criminal. Quite brilliant, I'd say." Ryuzaki stopped, as the NPA building was just around the corner. "Matsuda would be arriving in a few minutes, and I presume you wouldn't want him to see me, correct?"

"Correct." He nodded. Ryuzaki hummed in understanding.

"Very well, I'll hear from you another time then, Raito-kun…" Ryuzaki turned and returned the way they'd come. Then he stopped, abruptly, looking at him over his shoulder. Raito frowned, wondering why… Until he looked down and understood.

His hand had firmly gripped the other's wrist, preventing him from taking another step. He blinked, looking back up. "Uhm…"

"Was there something more you wanted?" Ryuzaki asked, patiently, even though he looked a bit unnerved.

"Uhm… no…" He shook his head, and let go. Ryuzaki tilted his head slightly, but then shrugged, and continued to walk away. Raito stood silent, watching his back. Then he looked down on his hand, frowning.

If all humans, underneath intelligence and social standards, where the same… Then what natural urge had made him grab the other's wrist?

Why had he been trying to prevent the other from walking away?

**Oh, Raito cutie, you can wonder about that for a while snicker Anyway! Hope you liked! It's developing, slowly but surely… Keep feeding me reviews – they keep me going 3**

**/Keyhala**


	10. Chapter 10

**Warning:** **Both disclaimer and story include spoilers up to and including volume 7! After that, not even I know what happens, but if you haven't read volume 7, and don't want to know major spoilers – do NOT read. If you don't mind spoilers or have already read, then please go ahead **

**Another chapter today, aren't I nice? laugh Chapter 11-13 are on their way too – so I catch up to the amount of chapters posted on **

**Disclaimer:** **I do not own Death Note or any of its Characters. If I did, L would never have died and There would've been a lot more yaoi laugh**

**Summary:** **In the year 2010, Kira's will has almost become the law. Raito has no more competition as the chief inspector of the NPA. Even if the role of 'L' was relinquished a year earlier, at the same time as Near and Mello got wiped from history, he has no problem, since he holds the entire police force of Japan, as well as well as the role of the worlds 'saviour', Kira. There are slight complications with the now upcoming discussions about disbanding the police, but he doesn't see it as a long-term problem.**

**Everything seems to be going fine, up until Friday the thirteenth of August, when something pretty unpredictable happens. One of the newly dead criminals, who got killed by Kira's judgement, suddenly reawakens on the hospital, three hours after her death. Shocked at this information, Raito decides to get information from the woman. But she has no memories of her life whatsoever, only her name, age and a cryptic phrase; "_Once is once – but everyone gains a second chance." _**

**Deciding to go home to think the entire situation over, he finds another shocking surprise waiting. For if a woman who has been dead can reawaken… then why couldn't also someone else?**

**Warnings:** **Yaoi (malexmale), Violence, Language**

**Well, with that in mind, why don't we get started? And my dears, please don't forget to review It would make a poor authoresses' day if you could take the time to write a decent review! Tell me what you think **

Chapter 10

Back in high school there had always been people skipping classes, especially when there were hard assignments or tests to be done for that specific class. Sometimes students took the day off, literally, and called in sick.

Yagami Raito had never understood the reason for even **thinking** about trying to slip out of your duties for such a trivial reason as for just not wanting to spend the day in school, but his current predicament allowed him to gain some sort of understanding.

For at this very moment, Yagami Raito felt like excusing himself for the rest of the day because some people were currently causing him a massive migraine.

"I still don't understand why the government is so set on listening to the ideals of a mass murdered, I mean they don't-"

"Matsuda, please…" He sighed, as the other man silenced to look at him oddly. "I know that we are in a tough spot as the government is now set on a diminishing of the Japanese police force, but there is nothing we can do. The mere fact that we are still investigating Kira as a criminal is ridiculous to the surrounding world. If the government got to know about that, we'd be gone. So don't speak so loudly."

"…" The man suddenly shrunk. "Oh… you're right…" He scratched his arm. "I didn't think about that."

Oh, that was hardly a surprise. Raito held his face calm even if he felt like glaring. Hanaya had, as he'd predicted, tried to put a move on him this morning. He had politely turned her blatant offer down, even if he felt a rising urge to just scribble the woman's name on a page in his Death note just for the sole purpose of getting rid of her. And as soon as he had left her behind him for the day, Matsuda had arrived, slamming open the door to his office and started his frantic rant about the current decline of the police force.

Unbelievable, he was ten minutes into his day at work and was already tired of it. Then again, it could have to do with his earlier occurrence with the eccentric detective. No, scratch that. It most positively had to do with that earlier occurrence. The entire morning had been hell so far, and he didn't know how much he could take before he snapped.

"Anyway, Matsuda." He said, as calmly and collected as he could. "Have you been investigating around who might be resurrecting the victims?"

"Yes, I have." Matsuda nodded, quickly. "No luck this far, though. Since I can't go out ask in public, it makes it hard."

"I can understand that." He put a frown on his face. "However, it wouldn't be wise to let the public know. That would create chaos as well as letting Kira know that something is spoiling his plans. And that could develop into that this person is found by him first. And we know that he would kill the person without much hesitation." If he had been able to, of course. He frowned bitterly. But he didn't say it out loud.

"T-That's true, of course…" Matsuda nodded. "A-At any rate, I'll return to investigating."

"Do so." He nodded briefly, rising up from his seat. "I will be collecting some background information on the few cases of this occurrence." And pick up some aspiring, he added in though. And for the second time that day he actually considered the idea of just going home.

"Okay." Matsuda gave an enthusiastic nod. "I'll call if I find something."

"Very well…" He nodded, and watched the man take a quick retreat. If this kept up, the man would soon start second-guessing the way they were investigating. However, he clearly doubted that the older male would ever guess that anything was wrong. He might wonder if they shouldn't take another way instead, but Raito was assured he could persuade the other to not think like that.

At any rate, if push came to shove, he'd just have to kill Matsuda. Simple as that. He shrugged softly as he picked up his jacket. He figured he could fetch some coffee at the nearby café, since the coffee at the NPA was hardly to be considered fit for human consumption. Quite the contrary.

"Hey, Ryuk." He said, softly, looking at the shinigami, noting the way the grotesque being was vacantly staring at a wall. "You've been awfully silent since we left the tennis court. Is something bothering you?"

"As far as tenshi are concerned, they never stay close to the humans they revive." Ryuk muttered. "So why does Jyiva accompany L?"

"He doesn't all the time, but I would presume it's to overlook his activities. After all, I don't think it's your everyday piece of cake to have people revive other human beings."

"That's true of course… it's just bothering me…"

"Well, the entire situation is bothersome, so you're not alone in that." He buttoned the light jacket and silenced as he moved to the door, hearing the god of death follow. Ryuk hadn't answered to his proclamation, but that didn't bother him at all in comparison to what awaited him outside the door. He stopped up, frowning. "…We meet again, Hanaya-san."

"Oh, I was just dropping by." She smiled sweetly, tilting her head slightly. "Seeing what happens on your end of the building."

"Not much, I'm afraid." He said, neutrally, not even frowning as he noticed another thing that bothered him about the 'unexpected' meeting with the woman – the fact that she had unbuttoned yet another button on her shirt since earlier that morning. She simply had to be violating the dress code soon. "Mostly paperwork, since I will supposedly be a part of those who select the parts of the NPA which will remain after they've decided to cut down on the police force." And he knew she wouldn't be able to guess that he had already placed her on the top of the list of those to go.

"Oh, sounds boring enough." She gave a soft pout, and he resisted the urge to sigh heavily. Stupid women… "Anyway, are you heading out?"

"Yes, I was thinking about doing that." He admitted, as he found no reason to lie. She obviously knew he had planned on leaving the building, as his attire showed proof of this rather well.

"Would you like company?" She asked, and he clenched his fist loosely. This woman was seriously getting on his nerves… seriously…

"Well, I-" He was cut off as his cell phone rang. "Excuse me for a second…" He picked the device up and glanced at the screen. Hidden number… He didn't frown outwardly, but he blinked as he pressed the button, lifting the phone to his ear. "Yes?"

"_Seems like a bothersome situation, Raito-kun._" He blinked again, and was on the verge of answering with something degrading, but didn't get the time to. "_If you'd like, you can pretend this call is from someone entirely else and use it as an excuse. If you don't set the lines, Raito-kun, she'll never stop._" He suddenly realized exactly what the detective meant, and blinked once before speaking up.

"Oh, yes… sorry, I had some trouble remembering at first." Hanaya blinked once, but waited patiently. Raito took a breath, figuring how to put this the best way.

"_At any rate, if you're heading out, and not intend to stay to close to the NPA, we could have a talk."_

"Oh, that sounds good enough." He gave a small nod, for the hundredth time wondering why people did that. "Remember that café we were at last time? How about there?"

"_The one three blocks away from To-Oh?"_

"Yes, that's the one."

"_Well, I guess you want to stay away far from the building for safety – very well._"

"Great. In ten minutes then?"

"_Sounds okay. Well then, hope I was to any help."_

"You wouldn't know." He gave a small laugh. "Well, see you there, then." He hung up, and glanced at the questioning woman next to him. "It seems I do have company, Hanaya-san. So I'm afraid your offer will have to be declined."

"…You're meeting someone?" Jealousy laced her words, and he smirked inwardly. Perfect.

"Yes. It was quite spontaneous, but it seems that I do have a date, Hanaya-san. And I wouldn't want to be late." Her eyes widened slightly but he left her without another word, smirking. Well, that would at least leave her shocked for a day or two.

As he left the building his cell phone made a small sound again, this time an email. He blinked and opened it.

"_My, my… I do feel quite flattered."_ He grimaced.

"Oh, shut up…" He grumbled.

** DeathNote **

The café hadn't changed much since the last time he had been here, a couple of years ago. He didn't clearly remember his last visit there, but remembered it was somewhere in the year 2008, early summer. But the interior of the place was something he remembered very clearly.

They still had the same plants, with the seemingly only purpose to efficiently shield one's conversations from others while creating a slightly claustrophobic – yet somehow protective – feeling. The entire room was light and open, as a slight contradiction towards the shielded feeling one got when seated.

Almost like himself, he silently mused in an attempt to interact himself in complicated thought. However, as it would seem, he quickly found that he himself was in no way near as much of a contradiction as the atmosphere, and so he dropped the thought to instead take a few long strides into the café.

"Raito-kun." He had already started glancing towards the right before the call rung out into the air, and true to his prediction, the detective had been quite literal to his phrase 'where we were last time'.

"Sorry to keep you waiting." He said, out of common courtesy, as he sat down on the seat on the opposite side of the table. The detective gave him a long stare, as if trying to figure out if there was any hidden meaning behind the words, before looking down into the half-empty cup he was currently twirling his teaspoon around in.

"Do not worry; I calculated I'd get here before you as I had a shorted route." Raito frowned softly. Well, that was a nice start of a conversation.

"Would you like something?" He glanced up at the foreign voice and cringed inwardly. **Another** female, this time a waitress, giggled softly as she put on her sweetest smiles. In the name of whatever was holy, had he a sign on his forehead saying 'I want to be stalked by rabid females'? If he did, he really had to remove it.

Despite that, he gave a small, polite smile in return, glancing down at the menu while rolling his eyes at the apparent blush on the girl's face. He noticed something that threw him of guard as he did so, though. He glance dup for the faintest of seconds to confirm his suspicion, only to find that, yes, indeed, Ryuzaki was silently chuckling, lips curved upwards in the slightest of smiles.

What was so amusing? His torment – or his acting? He'd have to ask later. He looked up at the girl again. "I'll take a black coffee…" He gave Ryuzaki's almost empty cup a look. "Ryuzaki, would you like to order something more?"

"I didn't bring money for more than one cup, as I figured you probably wouldn't have time for a longer chat…"

"And a strawberry shortcake." He cut off, addressing the girl while putting down the menu. She nodded and scurried away, while Ryuzaki blinked at him, twice.

"I said I didn't-"

"I'm not deaf, I heard you perfectly well. Ever heard of treating, Ryuzaki?"

"…" The detective fell silent, lifting the cup to his mouth with index finger and thumb, tilting it daintily to empty it. Raito awaited an answer, silently pondering on how the other male would have achieved the habit of holding objects so delicately and yet not dropping it. "I just didn't imagine you as the treating type, Raito-kun."

"Looks can sometimes deceive, Ryuzaki."

"I'm quite familiar with that fact, thank you very much." There was a slightly bitter tone to his voice and Raito quirked an eyebrow while they fell silent, as the waitress returned with their order. She gave Raito a quick smile, accompanied by a silly giggle before she left. He frowned and sighed before lifting the cup of coffee to his lips, taking a sip.

Glancing over the edge of the cup, he saw the raven-haired male gaze almost absently down at the cake, opaque eyes almost completely hidden by black bangs. Raito set the cup down before speaking up. "Is something the matter?"

"… I just got caught in a trail of memories." Ryuzaki answered, not looking up. "After all, you are quite the deceiver, Raito-kun. Your outer image and inner personality never accompany each other justly. You are a double-sided mirror, showing off two images. How many except for Ryuk and Misa have been allowed to see your inner side?"

"…" Raito noticed the other's lifted gaze had travelled to the shinigami behind him, and he was yet again bothered that Ryuzaki was able to see Ryuk. "One… One more person has been allowed to do so." He answered, taking another sip. The detective's gaze moved to him, inquiring… almost demandingly asking for him to continue. "You have."

"Ho? Now that was surprising." However, despite his words, the other male hardly looked surprised. Instead, he returned to looking at the treat on the table, almost studying it. "If so, that must have been that one single time… that one last time." Raito frowned softly but didn't say anything. The detective spoke true. He had wanted the dying man to know that he had lost against Kira, and that Kira had indeed been the one he'd suspected from the start. "I really didn't have the time to ponder about it right there… I had some trouble breathing." There was a slight hint of sarcasm in the other's voice.

They both fell silent as Raito took another sip, taking notice in the fact that the detective still wasn't starting on the cake. "Aren't you going to eat it?" He asked calmly, setting the cup down.

"I do still wonder whether or not this so-called 'kind' gesture of yours is just another piece in your game, Raito-kun."

"Excuse me? In **my** game?" He asked, baffled, staring openly at the other for a second before regaining a calm exterior again. "What do you mean by that? The only one who is playing a game here is you, Ryuzaki."

"Really now? Because of what?" Black eyes glared back at him, challenging. For the first time in a long while Raito could sense something akin to hostility in the other, how faint it now may be. "Because I returned from the dead? Because I return unjustly killed people from the dead? Because I appeared before you? Why don't you enlighten me, Raito-kun?"

"…" Something hit him as he pondered over his answer, and he voiced his sudden realization out loud. "How come we always fight against each other?"

"….Excuse me?"

"We're constantly engaged in word battles, we always circle around the other without coming to a conclusion."

"That is because we are so different, Raito-kun. Both in views and personalities."

"Are we really?" Ryuzaki blinked, shortly, locking eyes with him again. Raito took a small pause to take another sip of his coffee. "True, we fight against each other, but not because our views are all that different. We both work with the police in some sort of way, Ryuzaki, so we both wish to see justice be served over the wrongdoers. There we are alike. However, our views on how to **reach** that justice are different. Correct?"

"Correct." Ryuzaki nodded. "Your analytic ability still sometimes overwhelm me, Raito-kun. However, there is also another thing that differs us at that point."

"And that is?"

"That I wish for all **evildoers** to be brought to justice. You wish for all who seemingly are evildoers, including people standing in your way or who could be a threat, to be judged by your so-called justice, where their only defence would be if they protected their name. Also," black eyes narrowed, "you are willing to make exceptions. As yourself. And why? Because otherwise it would go back? You're not immortal." Raito opened his mouth but was cut off. "I know, we discussed this earlier. We would only end up in circles again."

"Then why do we trail back on that topic again?"

"Because we wish to come to a conclusion, perhaps?" Ryuzaki for the first time now took a bite of the cake, frowning softly. Raito tilted his head, silently noting to himself that the detective's thoughtful look added a slightly more handsome feature to his face. Of course he didn't say this out loud, though. He even resented himself for even thinking it.

"That might be so." He agreed. "Or, we want to prove ourselves to the other." Ryuzaki blinked, looking up at him, taking another bite of the cake.

"Interesting statement. Please do continue." Then he looked down again, using the fork to carefully push the strawberry on top of the cake away to the side of the plate.

"You told me this morning that we always seek challenges, and seek victory over our hardest cases." He lifted the cup to his lips and drunk the last little sips of coffee. "And to you and me, the other is our hardest case. Our greatest challenge is the other's logical and analytic abilities. We wish to prove ourselves better than the other by conquering the opposing part in our means of battle."

"With our words. With our wits, and with our logic." Ryuzaki nodded softly to himself as he spoke. "Interesting thesis, and perhaps true. And that's also where our relationship falters."

Relationship? Interesting choice of words… Raito frowned softly, pushing the thought aside with slight disgust. "How so?"

"We can never indulge in a friendly relation as we constantly seek to conquer the other's mind. At least not until there is a result to the entire battle."

"And at the moment, we're in stalemate, wouldn't you say?" Raito chuckled softly. "Our other means of battle is the battle where I use my Death Note and you use your powers. And we're tied in that one too."

"Very true." Ryuzaki took another bite, while Raito watched him silently, hearing Ryuk chuckle in the background. Stupid shinigami. "So how do you suggest we could conclude this?"

"Well, you could give up and accept that the world is as it is today." He said, simply. Of course he knew the detective would have no intention to go along with that. The raven-haired male was just as stubborn as he was with his thoughts and beliefs. Perhaps that was why he constantly sought to battle him? To see how would hold on the longest? To see if he could even bring down the single individual in this world who was capable of putting him on a knife's edge? To see if he could stand victorious in the only real battle this life might give him?

"You know that is impossible for me to do." Ryuzaki said with finality. "By two reasons. One, I promised Jyiva, and secondly, I don't believe in your so-called justice. And that is not for my own sake – it's because I know people are scared of Kira, and afraid of what might become with their lives."

"Only the evildoers would fear. All the innocent stand free, and they don't fear me."

"Do they not?" L glanced at him, questioningly. "Perhaps you should use your ears and listen, Raito-kun. Don't sit on the top of your supremacy and believe that you know everything. Sometimes it can be a good thing to listen."

"…I do listen."

"Really? Then why don't you come out and greet your 'followers'? If they admire you that much, you don't have to hide." There was a hint of smug amusement in the other's voice. However, the laugh stopped as quickly as Raito blinked, as they both realized a fact at the same moment. "We're starting again." L sighed softly. "It seems it is impossible for the two of us to correspond on a friendly basis. But that doesn't change the fact that you are my friend, Raito-kun, and I do intend on stopping your near-lunatic game of power before it'll cost you your life and rob me of my only friend. That is, after all, my first-hand purpose of once again standing in your way."

"…" Raito frowned, looking down into his empty cup. What was up with all that cheesy talk? He didn't believe it for one second. The detective could sound how honest he wanted, but in the end it was all about victory. They weren't that different, and their trails of thought were rather alike. So L might be using Raito's strategy from their earlier battle. But that was also where it faltered. They had played the friendly game before, and Raito could do it again. He could go along with it for a while, until he had it all figured out, and then strike. He knew Ryuzaki wouldn't as easily fall as the last time, now that the tenshi was supporting his lifespan, but there had to be a catch.

There simply had to be something fishy about this revival thing that the detective was withholding from him. Positively. To at least hundred percent.

"I presume you cannot stay away from the NPA for too long…" Ryuzaki interrupted his thoughts, and he glanced up, seeing that the detective had finished his piece of cake. "I wouldn't want to keep you away from your duties for too long."

"…Hold on." He said, just as the other was about to rise. Ryuzaki blinked, but seated again, pulling his feet up on the seat. "You keep feeding me this 'You're my friend'-joke, but I don't trust you to that at all."

"I know that." Ryuzaki gave a – rather lopsided – smile, "However, it is the truth. If I hadn't thought of you as my friend, I wouldn't bother with trying to stop you by making you retract from your actions. If I truly only wished for you to be stopped, I'd have waited for the shinigami to kill you."

That was a good argument, but there was something that was off. Nice try, Ryuzaki. He leaned back, folding his arms. "You're not that sort of person, Ryuzaki. If your goal was to stop me, you would have tried to do it yourself whether or not you cared about my wellbeing. You're a just as competitive person as I am. Therefore that argument doesn't count."

"Then so be it. It's still the truth. You **are** my only friend Raito-kun. And you're the only reason I returned to life and threw my place in heaven away. Even I am not stupid enough to do something like that just for victory. You might have crossed the line to give up everything for victory, but I haven't." The other male rose up without further ado, straightening up as much as his slouched posture allowed. "Thank you for the cake, Raito-kun. It was a nice, almost friendly gesture."

Was he sensing some bitterness in those words? He blinked as the other walked away from the table, before rising hastily. After slamming down a few bills on the table he hurried after the other, not even wondering what in the world he was doing. There had just been this sincere bitterness in the other words… and he was acting without thinking – a rather uncommon thing for him to do. "Ryuzaki."

He caught up to the other just outside the door, latching on to his wrist, stopping all movement. The detective flinched sharply, eyes widened slightly as he turned to look at him. Raito took a couple of breaths, straightening up. "What is it… Raito-kun?" Ryuzaki asked, slowly, almost uncertainly. Raito noted the way he gently bit his bottom lip in a nervous gesture and didn't even comprehend what his body was doing, before he covered the other's lips with his own.

The kiss was short, chaste and sweet, the sugary taste from the shortcake still lingering on the other's lips. However, as his mind caught up to his body, he blinked his eyes back open, pulling back with slight fright of what he had just done. And one look to the other's face made his thoughts about the result rather split.

The other was staring wide-eyed at him, completely still. Raito coughed shortly, averting his eyes slightly.

"…It's common courtesy to end each date with a kiss." He mentioned, to try and cover up his slip, knowing it wouldn't really do any good. Ryuzaki didn't respond. Instead he merely raised one hand to his lips. And he looked… almost… frightened.

Raito widened his eyes, suddenly caught of guard. He averted his eyes in sudden shame and then left the startled other, hurrying on towards the NPA building while blushing in embarrassment as Ryuk was chuckling amusedly behind him the entire way. One phrase echoed through his head, almost challenging the shinigami's laughter.

What the hell had he just done!?

**And guess if I'm an evil authoress? WHY? Because I'll end this chapter there! Poor Raito, he acts before he thinks (which for us readers is a good thing xD) But well, we all have to wait until the next chapter to get to know more xD JUST because I'm that evil xD (which means – click to next chapter ;))**

**Anyway!**

**/Keyhala**


	11. Chapter 11

**Warning:** **Both disclaimer and story include spoilers up to and including volume 7! After that, not even I know what happens, but if you haven't read volume 7, and don't want to know major spoilers – do NOT read. If you don't mind spoilers or have already read, then please go ahead **

**Disclaimer:** **I do not own Death Note or any of its Characters. If I did, L would never have died and There would've been a lot more yaoi laugh**

**Summary:** **In the year 2010, Kira's will has almost become the law. Raito has no more competition as the chief inspector of the NPA. Even if the role of 'L' was relinquished a year earlier, at the same time as Near and Mello got wiped from history, he has no problem, since he holds the entire police force of Japan, as well as well as the role of the worlds 'saviour', Kira. There are slight complications with the now upcoming discussions about disbanding the police, but he doesn't see it as a long-term problem.**

**Everything seems to be going fine, up until Friday the thirteenth of August, when something pretty unpredictable happens. One of the newly dead criminals, who got killed by Kira's judgement, suddenly reawakens on the hospital, three hours after her death. Shocked at this information, Raito decides to get information from the woman. But she has no memories of her life whatsoever, only her name, age and a cryptic phrase; "_Once is once – but everyone gains a second chance." _**

**Deciding to go home to think the entire situation over, he finds another shocking surprise waiting. For if a woman who has been dead can reawaken… then why couldn't also someone else?**

**Warnings:** **Yaoi (malexmale), Violence, Language**

**Well, with that in mind, why don't we get started? And my dears, please don't forget to review It would make a poor authoresses' day if you could take the time to write a decent review! Tell me what you think **

Chapter 11

"Oi, Raito. Raito, I'm talking to you!" The brown-eyed male narrowed his eyes slightly further, but didn't answer to the shinigami's exclamations. Instead he eyed through another document, not even bothering to try and decipher the English as he wouldn't be able to focus on it either way, he knew. It was merely an excuse to ignore Ryuk for the time being.

After all, he had no intention of explaining himself at this moment. And it was all simply because there was no explanation to give. He had no idea why he had taken that certain course of action. Even to Raito himself, it was a complete mystery. What the hell had he been doing?

And even more importantly – what was he to do now?

Putting down the paper, letting it go half a feet above the desk's surface, he watched it fall to the smooth surface with a sigh, eyes closing briefly as he hid his face in the palm of his hand. He had only experienced the feeling of being at a complete loss a few times in his life. He was pretty assured he could count them all on one hand's fingers.

But he had always managed to find something to do within half an hour after the incident. But those incidents had been minor things, like breaking his mother's vase when he was four – such things.

This… This was far more serious. On many levels.

And it had been two and a half hours – and he had neither found something to do nor had he heard anything from the man he so hurriedly had left behind in his sudden moment of shame. He wasn't sure what worried him most.

"Raiiiiiiito…" He narrowed his eyes again, still ignoring the shinigami. There had to be something… as his hasty excuse wouldn't have done any good, he knew. And saying something idiotic now would probably make it worse. If he'd even get in touch with the detective that is…

"_Yagami-san?_" He blinked, raising his head and glanced at the intercom with a sceptical look. "_You have an impending call._" He pressed the button with a small scowl.

"Ask whomever it is to leave a message…" He grumbled, released the button and leaned back again. He really had no intention to talk to some idiotic reporter or someone from the local police force or even the government at the moment…

"Raito." He glared at the shinigami, still not answering but showing that he was growing annoyed. The shinigami opened his mouth to say something but was interrupted by the secretary walking in through the door, with a look on her face that was not really in confusion, yet she seemed questioning.

"Here's the message, Yagami-san." She said politely, despite her facial expression, and then dropped the note on his desk before leaving quickly again. He guessed that she'd been able to read his annoyance. He frowned though. Had something been troubling her?

"Hey, Raito, I think you should look at this." He didn't reply, but snatched the small note from the shinigami's hands, turning it so that he could read.

It was very short, very consist… and very, very simple. And he almost felt like laughing, despite the pressure he was feeling.

_I have to say you're wrong, Raito-kun. There are no sources telling of any common courtesy like that._

"Honestly…" He sighed, shaking his head as he pocketed the small note without even giving it a thought.

"Honestly?" Ryuk echoed, in a questioning tone.

But Ryuk could as well have been talking to the air.

** DeathNote **

"So you still haven't found anything?" He asked, with strained patience.

"Nope." Matsuda shook his head. "But it's hard to investigate as no new criminals occur, meaning no more deaths."

"That would be true." Raito nodded, again wondering why Matsuda had called him and asking of him to come to the meeting room. Unless he didn't have something to say, the meeting that they'd had Friday the twenty-seventh of August would have been sufficient. There was no need to have another one three days later.

"However…" The other man's words brought him back to the conversation at hand.

"However?"

"All victims do have something in common."

"Except for the entire returning-to-life part?" He asked, blinking once. There were a lot of things concerning the revivals that he knew but Matsuda didn't. Perhaps Matsuda could come up with something he didn't already know, but he strongly doubted it.

"Their way of dying."

"Huh?" He blinked. Let's see… four deaths. Two heart attacks, one car accident and one choking. What connected those? "What do you mean?"

"After their deaths, all the bodies ended up at a hospital. Also, even though the one dying in a car accident had died from blood loss, no vital organs had been damaged."

"…Which means their bodies were intact and capable of functioning."

"Indeed." Matsuda gave a quick nod. "So the only thing needed was for the heart to begin to beat again. There is a possibility that whomever we are searching is capable of that."

"Check the hospitals where the victims were, and ask if they'd seen anything suspicious." He mentioned, almost absently. "Was that all?"

"…Uh… yes." Matsuda nodded, and Raito rose up, grabbing his briefcase before leaving the room.

They were all intact and capable of functioning… He frowned. And they were at a hospital. That last probably didn't have much to do with it… but… Would Ryuzaki only be able to revive people under those conditions? Were the bodies needed to be intact? Or at least intact enough so that they could be saved under normal circumstances?

But somehow the fact of the location bothered him. Why in the hospital? Or rather, why had that word nagged him?

He would have to figure that out…

He left the NPA-building in silence, heading for his car. "Ryuk." He muttered, as he started the engine.

"Yes?" The shinigami sounded surprised.

"Would you think the location of the deaths would be of any importance?"

"You are the genius here, you tell me."

"Hmph…" he narrowed his eyes and drove out of the parking lot. "Maybe…there is a possibility that he wouldn't be able to revive them without the body."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, he can only restore the soul **into** the body, not recreate the body itself. But since the one who died in a car accident had wounds, he was probably able to heal them, in some way… or at least restore the normal blood level…" He frowned again. "But would he be able to save someone who drowned?"

"…I don't understand."

"Salt water destroys the lungs, for one. Also, the pressure of the water could destroy a lot of vital organs in itself… not to mention the possibility of the body not being found…" He hummed, softly, a small smile spreading. "That's certainly something to figure out…"

"You're still set on defeating L?"

"Of course." He blinked, glancing at the shinigami with an arched brow. "Why wouldn't I?"

"Well, based on your actions last Monday…"

"That was nothing deliberate, and I have no intention **at all** to repeat something that foolish." Raito growled, eyes returning to the road. The shinigami had stopped asking about it after a while, but now it had surfaced again.

But the worst part was that Raito himself was nervous about it. Ever since that small message, he hadn't heard a word from the detective. And it was slightly unnerving. Not because he was worried or something – but because he was afraid that he wouldn't be able to talk to the other because of that reckless move.

Of course, his only reason of wanting to talk with the detective was to get more information. That was all. Naturally.

"Yes, of course. I knew that." Ryuk hummed. "So you gonna kill someone in a test?"

"Can't have Kira's reputation ruined just like that, I will just have to wait until someone commits a crime."

"Isn't it boring to wait?"

"It most certainly is." He stopped for a red light and glanced up at the sky Based on the clouds gathering, there would be some heavy weather later that evening. Perhaps even thunder…

He paused, wondering. Would the detective be alright if the thunder broke out? Jyiva might help him out, but if the tenshi wasn't there…

"Oi, Raito."

"What!?" He snapped, glaring at the shinigami in the rear-view mirror.

"The light is green, and the driver in the car behind us is mad." That was when he noticed that it was, indeed, green and that the driver behind them was loudly signalling for him to drive.

Cursing under his breath, he drove through the intersection to notice that it switched to red just behind him, earning him an angry shout from the car he'd left behind.

"What were you thinking about, anyway?" Ryuk asked, curiously.

"Nothing… just nothing…" He muttered, but threw one more worried glance up towards the sky.

** DeathNote **

"I'm bored…" Raito glared at the Shinigami yet again, having grown sick of having his concentration disturbed by the shinigami.

"So go out and scare some people. Have books fly around in someone's house. Just stop disturbing me." He gave the dark being a last glare before returning to the book, rereading the page he was currently on with a soft frown.

"You're confusion me with a ghost – I don't do things like that." He wondered if the shinigami wasn't able to see the dark aura rising behind him at the moment. Raito's eyebrow twitched slightly as he slammed the book shut and placed it on the coffee table, leaning back in the armchair with an annoyed look on his face as he regarded the shinigami.

"So, what do you suggest I do? Kill someone out of the blue?"

"That wasn't what I was saying…"

"You were completely fine until that tenshi showed up." Raito pointed out, crossing his arms over his chest. Something had definitely showed to be off. Ryuk had been more 'bored' than usual, but question was if it wasn't something else that was on the shinigami's mind.

"…That's not true." The fact that the god of death denied it strengthened his suspicion.

"Then what is it?" He asked, with a clear tone of annoyance in his voice, eyeing the shinigami coldly. He really wasn't in the mood for this, but he guessed it would continue for the rest of his life if he didn't straighten it out. He glanced towards the window in the moment of silence, regarding the heavy drops of rain against the glass. Stupid weather. Either it was warm and sunny or, as in this case, rainy. Couldn't it just decide?

"It's just, rather unnerving." Ryuk finally admitted, and Raito glanced back at the otherworldly being. "The tenshi and shinigami have left each other alone for more than two-thousand years now."

"That long?" Raito blinked.

"Back then, they also allowed a human to revive people, much to the shinigami's dismay." Ryuk looked over towards the window. "That was the last time we clashed together before the tenshi left the human world alone."

"What happened?" Raito sat back again, blinking once more. This information could become useful. "What was the battle for?"

"Shinigami who killed a human each twenty or so years to stay alive started dying because this human being revived ones we killed." Ryuk explained. "And we never found out why, but to try and stop it, we killed more humans than ever. The tenshi answered with reviving more. Of course, some of them died. A lot of them, to be more precise."

"Why didn't they just let the human do it?"

"That's a good question." The shinigami looked at him again. "But somehow, it was as if they didn't want him to revive unnecessary amounts of humans. We also questioned why more humans weren't made into human tenshi."

"Hold on!" Raito stopped the shinigami, raising one hand. "Human tenshi?"

"That's what they are usually called. Humans infested with tenshi powers." Of course, it made sense, but…

"So Ryuzaki's…"

"A human tenshi, yes." Ryuk nodded. "Also…"

"Also…?" He urged, eyes narrowing. There was something hesitating in the shinigami's words that made him suspicious.

However, before the shinigami could answer, the room was lit up by a clash of thunder outside. Raito's eyes widened slightly as he turned to look out the window. A clash that severe…

He couldn't help but worry.

"Raito?" He glanced back at Ryuk. "You still with me?"

"Yes… yes… I asked you to go on."

"It's just a thesis, but we did come to believe that the former human tenshi was-…"

Ryuk was yet again interrupted, but not by the thunder. Raito blinked as he fished up his cell phone from his pants pocket, narrowing his eyes slightly. Hidden number… Maybe… He pressed a button and lifted the phone to his ear. "Yes?"

"…_R-Raito-kun?"_ he wasn't surprised to hear the other's voice at the other side of the line, and closed his eyes.

"Yes? Are you okay?" He asked, slowly, referring to the thunder. A short, almost nervous laugh answered.

"_Okay is probably n-not the right word…_" The other took a breath and Raito frowned at a background noise. Was that the rain…? "…_I-I'm not really able to move…_" Another short, strained laughter was followed by a low muttering that almost sounded like 'stupid reflexive defence'.

"Was it the thunder?" Raito continued, trying to sound calm. Something with the other's quivering voice was unnerving him, something that seemed like this was something else than the last time. Then he heard the sound clearly, the sound of rain against the ground. But… Wait... "Hey, where are you!?"

A short pause. "…_Just… r-right by the tennis court…_" Raito closed his eyes with a small sigh, in order to collect himself just slightly.

"What the hell were you doing out!? Even **I** could see it was going to thunder!"

"…_That's… a quite good question, R-Raito-kun._" Was the answer he got. "…_I do not know the answer… though…_"

"Just… stay there, I'm on my way." He hung up before the other could say another word and stalked out into the hallway, grabbing his jacket. He could see that the shinigami regarded him from the corner of his eyes, questioning. "You can stay here, Ryuk, I'll be right back."

"Uh…" The shinigami stared almost dumbly after him as he stepped into his shoes, not bothering to tie them properly, and then rushed out into the heavily pouring rain. The door slammed shut behind him, and he didn't even for a second think about locking it. A clash of lightning lit up the sky as he turned left, not slowing down the slightest. His hair was already completely soaked, sticking to his face in a most irritating way as he furiously blinked to be able to see the pavement before him.

At the next corner a car drove past just as he ran round it, resulting in a wave of water drenching his jacket and pants. He didn't slow down, but cursed the driver under his breath and remembered the number plate on the car, for later research.

The rain hit his face harshly, as if taunting him, while he skidded around the last corner, feet slipping slightly so that he was forced to slow down to regain his balance before continuing.

Skidding to a halt, he gasped for breath while his eyes flicked around the area. The tennis court was here, but where…

He noticed the other sitting just by the edge of the court, leaned against the fence. HEHeRaito blinked once before rushing over the street, by mere luck being able to avoid being hit by a car on his way. Falling to his knees before he even had halted completely, he carefully laid a hand on the other's shaking shoulder. At least he wasn't unconscious… even if he held his eyes closed.

At first, Ryuzaki didn't respond, breathing irregularly while the tremors showed no sign of lessening in magnitude. Raito bit his lip, wondering faintly how long the other had been out in the rain without a jacket…

"Hey… hey!" He said; trying to contain a nervous tone in his voice as he gently shook the other's shoulder. "Ryuzaki!" He shook the other a little more forcefully. He quickly scanned the situation in his mind. Ryuzaki was breathing, even if labouredly, and he wasn't unconscious as far as he could see… so…

"…" A small frown appeared on the other's face, before opaque eyes opened slightly. Black met brown as the detective slowly glanced up at his face, tiredly. "…Hey." A small smile accompanied the words, even if it looked drained.

"Don't you 'hey' me!" Raito growled in aggravation. "What the **hell** where you thinking?"

"…Probably not at all…" The other's tone was hushed, yet calmer than it had been on the phone earlier… speaking of which… Raito glanced down at the other's hand, still holding the cell phone which was most likely destroyed by the water by now. "…I couldn't… hold up my arm." Ryuzaki laughed wearily. "Nor could I move it…"

"Idiot!" Raito snorted, collecting the cell phone and putting it in the pocket of his jacket. "I can't believe that **you**, who have Karaunophobia, would even **think** about walking outside when it is **clear** it is going to thunder! And without a jacket, on top of all!"

"…I didn't think…" The smile dropped from the other's face in a tired sigh. "…I just… didn't think…" A flash of recognition ignited in Raito's mind as the other's voice sank in volume, and he quickly did the first think he'd think off, and slapped the other firmly. Black eyes snapped open again.

"Don't. You. **Dare** faint on me!" He commanded harshly, before softening his voice again. "Can you move at all?"

"…" Ryuzaki glanced down at his hand, which shook visibly, but was able to move it, even if ever so slightly. "…A bit…"

"…But you cannot walk…" Raito sighed, before shrugging off his jacket and hanging it around the other's shoulder. "Idiot." He muttered again. "I'll just have to carry you."

"…You shouldn't need to…"

"I cannot leave you out **here** for the entire night, right?" He snorted, moving some hair out of his eyes before hooking one arm under the other's knees and the other around his back. "If you can move your arms, at least hold onto me, okay?"

"…" Ryuzaki wordlessly complied, imperceptibly wrapping both arms around his neck, head tiredly falling against his shoulder.

"Just hold on…" Raito murmured while taking a breath, bracing himself as he stood up a little clumsily. He noted, though, how light the other was. Which – in fact – would have been a laughable matter any other day; as he couldn't understand how the other could be so light with the amount of sweets the detective devoured daily. "You steady?" He then asked, tilting his head just slightly.

"…I'll be okay…" The reply was a tired as the man looked, and Raito frowned worriedly before straightening up slightly more.

Looking around for a second, he then crossed the road slowly, not saying a word. The silence was uncomfortable, but he hadn't anything to say. He worriedly glanced up at the sky, hoping the thunder had mostly passed.

"…Raito-kun…" He blinked at the tired proclamation, swallowing softly as the other's breath brushed against his neck. "…I'm cold…"

"Tsk." He snorted, fighting back a threatening blush. "…Your own damn fault for going out in this weather…"

"…I'm sorry…" Raito quickly looked to the side, feeling the heated sensation of the blush colouring his cheeks.

"N-No need to feel sorry." He muttered, almost tripping over his own words. "…Just hang on, okay? We're almost there."

He didn't dare to look at the other, instead kept his gaze directed forwards. The detective sighed, resting his head more comfortably against his shoulder.

"…Thank you."

"…F-For what?" He asked, swallowing. He cast a small glance towards the other's face, noticing the small smile present on the detective's lips, as well as his almost relaxed facial expression with closed eyes.

"…For being there."

**And THERE goes chapter 11. Way we're moving steadily forwards! dances around And**

**I LOVE all the reviews I get Keep them coming!**

**Until next time!**

**/Keyhala**


	12. Chapter 12

**Warning:** **Both disclaimer and story include spoilers up to and including volume 7! After that, not even I know what happens, but if you haven't read volume 7, and don't want to know major spoilers – do NOT read. If you don't mind spoilers or have already read, then please go ahead **

**I am out of my mind... Why? Well, all the previous chapters have been 8 pages – and chapter 12 is…**

**17 pages!**

**All for my dear readers **

**Disclaimer:** **I do not own Death Note or any of its Characters. If I did, L would never have died and There would've been a lot more yaoi laugh**

**Summary:** **In the year 2010, Kira's will has almost become the law. Raito has no more competition as the chief inspector of the NPA. Even if the role of 'L' was relinquished a year earlier, at the same time as Near and Mello got wiped from history, he has no problem, since he holds the entire police force of Japan, as well as well as the role of the worlds 'saviour', Kira. There are slight complications with the now upcoming discussions about disbanding the police, but he doesn't see it as a long-term problem.**

**Everything seems to be going fine, up until Friday the thirteenth of August, when something pretty unpredictable happens. One of the newly dead criminals, who got killed by Kira's judgement, suddenly reawakens on the hospital, three hours after her death. Shocked at this information, Raito decides to get information from the woman. But she has no memories of her life whatsoever, only her name, age and a cryptic phrase; "_Once is once – but everyone gains a second chance." _**

**Deciding to go home to think the entire situation over, he finds another shocking surprise waiting. For if a woman who has been dead can reawaken… then why couldn't also someone else?**

**Warnings:** **Yaoi (malexmale), Violence, Language**

**Well, with that in mind, why don't we get started? And my dears, please don't forget to review It would make a poor authoresses' day if you could take the time to write a decent review! Tell me what you think **

Chapter 12

"Is he dead?" Raito glanced up at the shinigami's face while closing the door with a firm shove of his foot, wordlessly carrying the other male into the living room. Ryuk hadn't showed any sign of having joked, and he could understand that the question was rather natural for the god of death. But he knew, that despite the pale appearance the other had, the detective was still breathing.

He carefully laid the other down on the couch, retrieving the wet jacket with a small frown. But he had realized the other's weight had increased, even if only slightly. "No, he's just unconscious." He finally answered the shinigami. Hanging up the jacket he entered the bedroom to get a duvet, returning to the living room soon thereafter.

"Oh…" Ryuk was just watching the unconscious man on the couch with a blank look. "So that's it…"

"He'll just have to change once he wakes up…" Raito muttered, feigning annoyance as he daintily laid the duet over Ryuzaki, frowning still at the paleness of the other's skin. Sure, the detective was pale usually… but this…

This was slightly frightening. Not only the other's sudden stupidity at going out in the rain, without a jacket when there was a possibility of thunder, but also his own sudden rash actions. He had blindly rushed out, not even locking the door. He could just as well have ignored the fact that the other had called and left him out there.

"But Raito, you could have just left him out there, couldn't you?" He glanced at Ryuk. Stupid shinigami, thinking in the same lines as Raito himself. "That way he would've died, I'd say. And so you wouldn't have any problems with that anymore."

"…Though that isn't exactly correct…" Raito muttered. "I still don't know enough, for starters… and also… I do not want to win this battle with luck." But as he heard those words leave his lips, he knew he was lying to the shinigami. It didn't really have anything to do with the battle itself, did it?

"I guess that's-…" Raito looked up as Ryuk trailed off, only to find that Jyiva had entered the room. He silently cursed the unearthly creatures and their ability of appearing out of what seemed to be nowhere. "What are you doing here?"

"…I just returned." Jyiva said, calmly, gazing at the unconscious male on the couch. Something flickered in icy cold eyes that Raito couldn't really place, but he knew something bothered the tenshi.

"Is something the matter?" He asked, in a general calm tone, watching Jyiva lift his gaze to him.

"I returned here by the main reason that… L's name had appeared in the Kiseki again."

"What?"

"It had appeared in the Kiseki. During a time when a Death Note is active, ones name appearing in the Kiseki means your lifespan is running out completely." Ryuk said; answering before the tenshi could. "Meaning that his 'final choice' had been made."

"Final choice?" He knew he was sounding like a parrot, but something in the back of his head told him this was valuable information. Not what it would be valuable for – it just was.

"If a Death Note is not active in the human world, every human's fate is predestined. There is always some who are going to be murdered, or die by illness, and it's all decided." Jyiva closed his eyes. "Once a Death Note appears – those rules changes. For if you kill someone unexpectedly, thereby disrupting the natural turn of events, someone else's lifespan inevitably changes."

"So in the long lead, there are no predestined deaths, you mean?" Raito asked, sitting down in the armchair, contemplating the information. It did make sense, he figured. If the Death Note ended someone's life before their original, destined, lifespan had run out, it would affect someone else. Who was to say what the killed human had done in the last years of his or her life?

"That's correct." The tenshi nodded patiently. "So there appeared a new 'rule' that was created when a Death Note became active in the human world for a larger expanse of time. The 'final choice'. If a human being has no predestined death, which in the end happens to all human beings if a death note is continuously used in the human world, their lifespan changes by every choice they make. In the end, the last choice they make decides their fate."

"So when Ryuzaki went out in the rain…" Raito started.

"He wrote his own death sentence." Ryuk affirmed. "However… it must've been erased again, right? For he's not dead."

"That's the strange part." Jyiva sighed. "For when a name has appeared in the Kiseki, there is no human being that can change the fact that he was going to die…" No human being… Wait.

"For once I might be able to help." Raito said, straightening up. Both beings gave him a confused look. He smiled a little at the comical sight. "You said that no human being could change it… a human being is a being that in the end is going to be judged for a place in heaven or hell, right?"

"That would be correct." Jyiva nodded.

"Then the fact that **I** helped him doesn't ring a bell?"

"…" Ryuk looked generally confused while Jyiva frowned softly. "Of course. You, as a user of the Death Note, won't be judged as your name was permanently erased from the Kiseki when you started using the note… Therefore you're not counted as a legitimate human being. So anyone else's choices can still be affected by your actions."

"Mystery solved." He looked away from the two otherworldly beings with a soft frown. Even if he had already suspected so, it was slightly uncomfortable to hear he was no longer considered human. Ironic. What was he then? But there was something more to this. For even if he had brought the other out from the rain, did that really mean that he had saved his life, or…

"You still seem troubled, Yagami Raito." He looked at the tenshi again, still wearing the same frown.

"You left heaven directly after noticing his name was written in the Kiseki, correct?" He asked, calmly.

"Correct."

"So you did not wait and see if it disappeared again?"

"…" The angel blinked once, before shaking his head. "I did not."

Raito sighed. "So there **is** a possibility that he could still be written in it." That wouldn't be good at all. He threw a worried glance towards the detective. He got no answer but knew that he was right. There still was a possibility that Ryuzaki was written in the Kiseki and meant to die. Ryuk wouldn't tell him if so was the case, and Jyiva did not know. Simply fabulous.

"If you'd wish, I could return and have a thorough check on the situation." Jyiva proposed while tilting his head slightly with a slight bristle of his wings, perhaps from the hateful look the shinigami gave him.

"That would be appreciated." Raito gave a small nod, eyeing Ryuk carefully. It was still concerning him what was wrong with the shinigami. And even more what he had against the tenshi, except for the entire 'we are opposing races and each other's nemeses' and things like that.

Jyiva gave Ryuk one look before nodding towards the brunet and then leaving in utter silence. Raito let out a soft sigh, glancing at Ryuzaki again, a hint of worry present in his features. For safety's sake, the other would have to change as soon as possible, and get warm.

"Why are you concerned about him?"

"There is far too much I still don't know." He explained in a more patient tone than he felt. He was contemplating silently on either waking the other up or waiting until Jyiva returned. Based on his current state of mind, he was leaning towards the first…

"Is that really all?"

"**Yes**, that's really all." The shinigami's suspicious tone caused him to add an edgy tone to his voice, as he firmly decided that the sooner the other changed into dry clothes, the better. With that decided, he kneeled slightly next to the other and shook him, none too forcefully.

"…If you're sure about that…" He heard the shinigami's distrust, and glanced over his shoulder to see the outwardly sour god of death make his way to the kitchen. For a faint moment he was worried for his own safety as well, but dismissed the thought as he refocused his attention towards the still unconscious detective, shaking him with slightly more force now.

"Ryuzaki!" He growled angrily and shook the other again, biting his lip to not get into an uncharacteristic panic. He needed to stay collected. It was very important that he remain calm. Panic only caused illogical decisions, and illogical decisions led to stupidity. Did he also have to mention that stupidity was not in his character?

During his mental struggle against panic, he failed to see the frown appearing on the other's face before the other peered one eye open to look at him. That was the reason for his startled jump when the detective's soft voice reached his ears. "Did you read fairytales as a child, Raito-kun?"

Recollecting his calm after that startle, he cleared his throat before contemplating Ryuzaki's strange inquiry. "Some, when I was really little. Why?"

The detective's lips quirked in a small smile while an amused glint appeared in jet black of his eyes. "It was a while since I read one myself, but I **do** believe that most fairytales had a very efficient way of waking someone up."

Raito blinked, dumbstruck for a split second before snorting firmly. "You're well enough to crack jokes, I hear."

"Oh no, Raito-kun, I was absolutely serious." The detective ensured, never changing the look on his face. Dark eyes closed again as a soft sigh slipped between his lips, accompanied by a slight tilt of his head. "Did you know that fairytales always have simple solutions for everything? I have always wondered what the point is in trying to make the young ones believe that everything in life was simple. They would, after all, sooner or later find out it is all a cruel joke."

What was the other getting at? Raito frowned. Of course he had since long dismissed every thought of believing in things like fairytales, but why was the detective digging into what they both knew was just a twisted view of… He halted his thoughts. Fairytales showed a twisted view of a perfect world. A world where everything was simple.

"That…"

"They only make the children tell themselves that everything is that simple, and that every decision that they believe is good will be good – and if it by some unknown reason isn't, it always becomes good without much effort." Raito looked up to meet the other's piercing eyes. "Isn't that right, Raito-kun?"

Raito didn't answer. Instead, he stood up wordlessly and walked past the couch, seeing in the corner of his eyes that the other sat up slightly, still watching him. He could feel that look staring at his back as he headed for his bedroom door. He stopped there and turned slightly to regard the detective. "It would be best if you changed out of those clothes. You might get pneumonia." The other just kept watching him, and he continued. "I'll get you some clothing; you can take a shower if you want. There should be towels there as well."

He waited a little while, wanting to at least get some response from the other, but was only met with dead silence and that inquiring look. Sighing, he turned around again and entered the bedroom, closing the door behind him. He leaned against it, closing his eyes.

"_I have always wondered what the point is in trying to make the young ones believe that everything in life was simple."_

"Stop it…" he gritted his teeth, shaking his head.

"_- children tell themselves that everything is that simple, and that every decision that they believe is good will always become good without much effort."_

"Stop it…!" hands tightening to fists, he resisted the urge to hit them against the door behind him.

"_- would, after all, sooner or later find out it is all a cruel joke."_

"…!" Sinking down to a sitting position he decided to hit his clenched fist against his forehead, trying to will the unwanted words repeating in his head. It only made matters worse as a mental image of that clear, calm look – black, unreadable eyes looking so inquiringly at him. Almost demanding.

"_Isn't that right, Raito-kun?"_

"Of course it… of course it isn't!" he growled, dropping his hand from his face. "Stop playing those games with me…" Taking a deep breath, he rose up, shrugging his shoulders as if trying to shrug the uncomfortable feeling off himself. He shouldn't let the other's words come to him. The minute he did, he would lose. All his hard work to achieve this perfect world would go to waste.

Fairytales showed a twisted view of a 'perfect' world. He frowned. But this was no fairytale – this was reality. Of course. He just had to keep thinking of it that way. The detective was just trying to make him falter. That was the undeniable truth, and that was what he had to continue to tell himself.

He walked over to the wardrobe and scanned the shelves briefly before pulling out a long-sleeved sweatshirt and a pair of baggy pants. But his mind was distracted by a sudden rush of thoughts. He didn't believe that he was wrong, of course, but maybe he had been reading too much into the other's words? Maybe it didn't have to do with him being Kira at all?

Walking over to the dresser next and took out a pair of boxers and placed on the pile. What if there had been some other meaning with the whole fairytale ordeal that wasn't directly connected to the Kira-case?

He quickly shook his head. No second-guessing. If he did that, he'd only walk around in circles. He'd just have to decide that the reason for the other's words was to make him falter and in that way make him stop his judgement. That was **all** there was to it. End of mental discussion.

Shaking his head firmly, dismissing the thought altogether, he stepped out of the room again, casting one look towards the sofa and noting the other's absence as well as picking up the faint sound of running water. Well, at least the raven-haired male had taken him up on his offer.

His ears also picked up another sound, and he quickly located it to come from the kitchen. It would seem that Ryuk was devouring every apple in reach, which meant he would have to buy new ones the following days. Having a shinigami around wasn't the cheapest of hobbies.

Glancing down at the clothes he held, brown eyes travelled to the bathroom door and he frowned for a second, weighing between two options. In the end he just snorted and shook his head. Heading over to the door, he gave a small knock before opening it, just enough to be able to get through it.

He kept his gaze low and simply placed the pile of clothes on the bathroom counter. "I hope these are okay." He said, calmly, turning back to the door.

"Raito-kun." He paused, but didn't say anything. He was first met by only the sound of the water, which was then turned off, in order for him to hear the other's voice easier. "Did I make you upset?"

"…" He didn't answer, eyes never leaving the floor tile.

"For if I did, I'm truly sorry. It was not my intention."

Forcing air into his lungs, he collected his voice. "Don't worry about it." His voice came out an awful lot calmer than he felt. He walked out and closed the door, sighing heavily. Not his intention? Was the guy for real?

He snorted and headed for the kitchen to make himself some decent coffee. As he passed Ryuk, who was now eating the last apple in the bowl, he realized that it wasn't the detective he was annoyed at. What he was annoyed at was…

…was that Raito himself let the detective get under his skin.

** DeathNote **

When the detective emerged from the bathroom ten minutes later – fully dressed and riotously drying his hair with the towel – Raito could tell from his sudden surprised expression that the dark-eyed male hadn't expected him to have made coffee for him as well.

And probably not expecting him to have had anything sweet at home, either. Raito gave the other a calm look, before following his gaze to the box of assorted chocolates. "It was all I had home – I hope you don't mind."

"N-No, not at all…" Resuming to 'drying' his hair – it was actually more like violently manhandle it – the detective remained his stance. "It just came as a surprise."

Raito heard the last phrase even if it was slightly muffled by the towel, and gave a small smile now that the detective couldn't see his face. However… that way of drying his hair was starting to get on the brunet's nerves. "Honestly, Ryuzaki, stop it."

"Hm?" Black eyes looked up from beneath mussed black tresses and a fluffy white veil. The look on his face was somewhere between surprise and wonder "What do you mean?"

"You're going to do more damage than good if you dry your hair like that." The detective blinked once, glancing up at the fluffy white towel he still had draped over his head.

"I'm afraid I do not understand what you mean, Raito-kun. This way is a very proficient way of getting it dry." Raito sighed and put his cup down, shaking his head as he stood up and snatched the towel away from the other before the raven-haired male could resume his so-called drying.

The detective gave him a half-annoyed look, which he ignored. "Efficient for getting it dry, yes. Not an as efficient way to keep your hair in good shape."

"By what reason does my hair need to be in 'good shape', Raito-kun? I'm supposed to be dead." Raito snorted again, rolling his eyes.

"Supposed to be, yes. But you aren't. And any ordinary human being would at least make sure they didn't manhandle their hair so that it gets damaged." He shook his head and hung the towel over the back of the armchair, throwing the other's messy hair a look. "If you wish to get it dry quickly, you could always try an invention called the blow-dryer, Ryuzaki."

"…" He was met with a long stare before the detective simply ordered his messy hair with his hand. The result wasn't more arranged than it was before, but Raito chose to not complain further. Instead he just sat down again, watching calmly as the detective took a seat in the armchair, looking sceptically at the cup of coffee.

"I added five cubes for you. If that's not enough, the sugar bowl is to your right." Raito said patiently, taking a sip from his cup. When he put the cup down, the other was still just looking at the cup. "Is something wrong?"

"…No…" The detective frowned thoughtfully and lifted the cup, taking a small sip before frowning deeper. Setting the cup down, he added two more cubes and then took another sip. Seven, then. Raito had no idea why he chose to try and remember that. It just subconsciously lingered on his mind.

The silence that followed was, even if unusual among the two of them, quite comfortable. There was no eerie tension over it, nor was there any overlying question or accusation… There was just silence. But despite this silence, there was one thing gnawing at his mind that he had to get an answer to. "Why did you go out in the rain, Ryuzaki?"

"I didn't." He blinked, brown eyes locking with straightforward black. "As a matter of fact, I didn't even take notice to the fact that it started to rain."

It had rained when he left the office at four… He glanced at the time. A quarter past nine. Counting back, that would be… "So you where out there for more than four and a half hour?"

"I left the hotel at two, so that would be six and a half hour." Ryuzaki broke away from his eyes to look down into the contents of his cup. "I have the tendency to go so deep in thought that I'm unreachable. By the time I knew it was raining, the thunder had already accompanied it."

And to think, that Raito had always believed the other to be the alert type. "So that's that? You were just thinking to hard to notice?"

"In simple words, you would say that, yes." The detective took a sip from the cup and set it down, silently. Raito arched a brow, silently questioning the other about what one would say if it **wasn't** in simple words. Ryuzaki met his look for about zero point three seconds before averting his eyes to the cup again, fidgeting slightly as he bit his thumb in a most uneasy manner. And uneasy wasn't really a word to be associated with Ryuzaki. Careful, maybe. Contemplative, always. But uneasy…?

"And if we weren't speaking in simple words?" He finally asked, growing tired of the silence. And it was a natural question. For if you thought about it, since when did either of them speak in simple words?

"Then there is a much more complicated answer." Well, that sure helped a lot. Raito sighed and set down his cup, leaning back in the sofa, eyes narrowing slightly.

"I figured that much. But it still bothers me. What would make you think for six hours to the degree that you don't even notice that it starts raining and thundering?" Once again, the other averted his eyes, now finding the white wall to his left very interesting, as if it held the clues to the secrets of the world. Suspicion taking over, Raito leaned forward again. But just as he was about to almost demand an answer, he noticed that the other was shaking. He immediately dropped his frown and blinked. "Are you okay?"

"…W-what?" Opaque eyes turned his way swiftly. "O-Of course, no problem." But his eyes where slightly more widened than usual; and his left hand was gripping his knee quite forcefully.

"Honestly, Ryuzaki… you don't look so well." He said, rising up slightly. Black eyes widened slightly more, the detective subconsciously leaning back, away, slightly. Raito blinked before realization dawned upon him at the look in the other's eyes.

Panic. The shaking, the sudden shallow breathing, the look in his eyes – it made sense. Perhaps it was a post-traumatic reaction to the earlier thunder? Or had the trigger occurred just now…? He pushed the thought aside as he rounded the table. He quickly scanned his mind again. He simply had to get the other to breathe properly. That was all…

"I-It's…" The other gasped slightly, eyes widening impossibly further, a fear-struck look on his face as he lifted his right hand to his throat. "…R-Raito-kun, I-I can't breathe…"

"It's okay… just breathe." He tried, calm and collected as he was. Okay, there was a hint of sarcasm there. A great hint of it, too. He had to make sure **he** didn't panic too. Somewhere in his mind he wondered why he was worried, seriously contemplating this sudden care of his, but it was harshly put aside as the other gasped for air again, tears appearing in black eyes.

"I-I… I can't…" Okay Raito, think. Either Ryuzaki believed he couldn't breathe because he was breathing too rapidly, hyperventilating, or because he was having a choking sensation due to the panic, possible even dyspnoea. He held one hand up in front of the other's mouth. No rapid breathing. So either choking or dyspnoea. Either way, it wasn't very good. He had to calm the other down enough to get him to breathe, or…

"Of course you can. You're rational enough for this, Ryuzaki. It's all in your head." Of course the other knew, but the panicked state might block that rationality out. Ryuzaki locked eyes with him, and Raito could practically see the panic increase. Cursing under his breath, he gripped the other's right hand and gave it a soft squeeze, hoping for the other to focus on it to calm down. He got a reaction, the other's grip slightly too tight, but he didn't mention it. "Just breathe for me, okay?"

Never breaking their connected gaze or hands, he saw something flicker in the other's eyes – a slight hint of recognition, perhaps – before the black-haired make took a shaky breath. It was short and uncertain, but he breathed.

Realizing he'd held his own breath, Raito let out a relieved sigh. "There you go…" He felt Ryuzaki's grip on his hands loosen as the other male took another breath, eyes closing for a brief second. After a few more staggering breaths, the other seemed to have calmed down. Raito tilted his head slightly, trying to not look too worried. "Are you okay now?"

The other nodded shortly, looking back up. "Y-Yes, I'm fine. I'm sorry for being a nuisance."

"Not at all." Raito shook his head, standing up again. He halted, however, as the other's grip on his hand didn't completely loosen. "You're still holding my hand."

"…" Black eyes darted to their hands before the detective abruptly let go. "Sorry." The tone was low and almost muffled, as if in embarrassment. Raito arched a brow in question. What in the world was going on here? And what had caused the other's panic attack? He searched his memory. Something that could have been a trigger was him reminding the detective of the thunder. But it still seemed too vague…

Whatever it was, he supposed the other wouldn't tell him. He sighed softly and returned to his seat, not looking at the other as he took a sip of coffee, noting that it was now lukewarm at most. When his eyes finally turned upwards again, he found the other giving him an odd look. "What?"

"Is Raito-kun troubled about something?"

Well, wasn't that an odd question? "No, why so?" The other didn't answer, and the brunet shrugged softly and took another sip. "I just decided not to answer – pretty much the same way as you've been doing all along." Something flickered behind unreadable obsidian eyes, at which he could not help but huff, closing his eyes briefly. "Don't try to say that it isn't true, because we both know that would be a lie."

The detective frowned softly before leaning over to pick up a piece of chocolate from the box, watching it for a faint moment before shrugging softly and putting it in his mouth, biting down on it with utmost care. "Raito-kun, have you ever felt that you don't understand something?"

Of course he had. Especially with the detective around. The raven-haired male was impossible to understand. Even more when he was changing subjects just like that. "Of course."

"Have you ever **felt** something that you don't understand?"

"How do you mean now? Like some sort of pain, or what?" He narrowed his eyes, setting the cup down carefully. His mind raced. The detective was getting at something; the problem was just to grasp it.

"…" Black eyes were raised slightly, in thought, before the other hummed softly. "I guess you could call it that."

He **guessed** he could call it that? Guessed? "If it's some sort of pain I would say you should try to find out **where** it hurts and then see a doctor or someone else who can make it go away."

"Sounds reasonable…" The other's voice tailed off slightly, as a soft frown settled on his face. Something was definitively troubling the detective, Raito concluded. And something about seeing the other male troubled made him worry. He didn't know why, but blamed Ryuzaki for getting under his skin this way.

There was no reasonable explanation to why he suddenly had started to worry about the other. Or maybe it wasn't so sudden. It dawned on him, even if against his wishes, that he had been worried about the detective on more than one occasion the last weeks. The past seventeen days had been more or less about worry, confusion and annoyance. If it wasn't for the detective, it was Matsuda, or the awakenings, or his own life. Come think of it, it all connected to Ryuzaki in the end, anyway. But that was hardly the issue here.

"But, Raito-kun. What if it was more complicated?"

"Isn't it always?" He asked, slightly cynical, arching a brow at the detective, who took another piece of chocolate.

"Of course." A short laugh followed, slightly strained. The other was still fidgeting, seeming to search for words. Raito was almost amused. It wasn't often you were able to see the detective search for his words. But note – he was **almost** amused. Almost, if it weren't for the fact that the dark-eyed male's behaviour was outrageously odd – even for being him. The other's sentences were not as calculating as Raito remembered them; nor did he try to overthrow the brunet's answers. "What I mean is… if you know where it hurts, and know the way that could make it better, but you do not know **why** you feel the pain. Also, you know that the cure for it is impossible for you to achieve."

"…" What in the name of… "I'd say you don't have much to do. However, I do believe that you will have to seek an answer to why it hurts. I know that most people, and we are no exceptions, would want to have an answer. In addition, I don't believe that anything is impossible before you've tried and been proved right or wrong."

The detective nodded shortly, humming. Silence once again fell and Raito found himself wondering where Ryuk had gone off to. There weren't any sounds from the kitchen to show of the shinigami's presence. So either he had gone outside or disappeared into thin air. And since the second wasn't actually possible as long as Raito held the death note, he figured that the grotesque being had most likely taken his anger outside. He just hoped he hadn't made the shinigami too angry.

"Raito-kun, may I ask you a question?"

"You've asked me many questions in the last five minutes, but go ahead." He leaned back, glancing over towards the clock on the wall. It was a Monday, after all…

"Do you believe in the phenomenon called love?" He was certain he heard his neck snap as he rapidly turned his eyes to Ryuzaki again, noting the way the other wasn't looking back, instead gazing over to the bureau where he had been watching photographs seventeen days ago. "Misa-san… loved you, didn't she?"

"That was two questions." He mentioned, to buy time. "But it depends on what you mean. Love… I've never fully understood the feeling… to me it's one of the greatest weaknesses of the human race." He paused as the other looked away from the bureau to return his focus to the brunet. "Misa… probably had that weakness. And yes, I believe she loved me. She loved me if love is the obsessive feeling of completely depending on – and constantly wanting to be near – someone else."

"…And she was allowed to, wasn't she?" The detective gave a rare smile. "She must have been happy. I have heard people say that one-sided love is purely pain, but I think she might have been able to endure it because she was allowed to be near you."

"…If you say so." He looked down at his cup of coffee, but didn't really feel like drinking any more. He recalled what he himself had said a couple of seconds ago.

"_Love… I've never fully understood the feeling…"_

And then, something clicked.

"_Have you ever felt something that you don't understand?"_

It couldn't be that they thought in the same lines? Could it? He mentally shook his head. He had to push such thoughts away, or he might get stuck on them. Being objective was how he did it, and so it should stay. He just had to try and reach the subject smoothly, delicately. As with everything he did.

But the detective was faster than him in starting up the conversation again. "I'm just speculating. I mean, I can't know what was going on inside her head, despite me often being complimented as having a good eye for judging people. It's just hard to understand someone's thoughts about an emotion that is as foreign to you as any unknown language." Just speculating? Of course, what else could they do? As far as this conversation had gone, it was clear that neither of them understood the feeling known as 'love'.

Quite ironic. Two geniuses speculating about the feeling love felt quite… stupid, to be honest. But the more irritating thing about it was that he had no idea as to **why **they were having a conversation about that emotion. Oh yeah, Ryuzaki had started it, with those questions of his. "Well, she was demanding at first, but… I think she… I wouldn't say 'adapted', but… she grew a bit accustomed to the way I was… and she seemed to be okay with what she had."

"Didn't you ever feel sorry for her?"

"To be honest, no. And I still don't. She chose to be used as my weapon in this battle in exchange for this faked relationship we had." He frowned softly. Of course he had never cared about the girl. She was too dependant, too clingy and all too stupid. If he would ever want a real relationship – which he highly doubted – intelligence was a clear factor. He would want to have a decent conversation without a lot of dumb answers or unintelligent comments.

"I feel sorry for her." He snapped out of thought to look up at Ryuzaki, who balanced his teaspoon on the tip of his index finger, watching it with great fascination. "All she ever wanted back was your love. All the things she sacrificed for you. Her freedom, her heart, her trust… and her life." Was there a hint of bitterness there? Raito couldn't clearly tell, but he was surprised. It wasn't as if the detective had shown any hints of compassion for the young model before. He had on several occasions asked Raito to silence the girl, among other things. So why this sudden statement?

"What do you…"

"It must have been painful for her to try. To try and try and try, without ever getting a slightest hint of an inch closer to your heart. To sacrifice all she had and not receiving anything in return." Large black eyes were lifted to meet his brown ones. "I believe it must have been quite… painful. The sort of pain where you know what will make it better, but know it's impossible for one to achieve it." Raito opened his mouth, another piece clicking into his mind. He wanted to be proved wrong before he said anything. "Ah, let me finish." He blinked, but closed his mouth. "I know you said it's never impossible before you tried, but she **did** try, didn't she?"

"…" Raito thought for a second. He now realized this had nothing to do with Misa at all. She was just a reference for the detective to get another point across. He had to get clear with this. "…Just as you're trying now."

"Eh?" Ryuzaki blinked, the teaspoon over-balancing and falling to the table with a clanking noise. Deciding to not make it sound too wrong, Raito continued.

"You're trying to make me stop acting as Kira, and have been continuously doing so for the past seventeen days. It must be frustrating to not get anywhere." He was speaking completely out of the blue there, as it was not what this was about at all. He was starting to realize where Ryuzaki had wanted to lead the conversation now, but one question lingered.

What was the true meaning behind the raven-haired male's words?

"That was not what I meant." A soft pout settled over the detective's face as he picked up the teaspoon. Raito concealed a small grimace as the teaspoon was then dropped again, from the same height, another clinking sound ringing through the room. "And if Raito-kun is aware of that fact, then am I to assume that you're making fun of me?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about." At least, it was now confirmed that L's behaviour and questions where, in reality, about Ryuzaki himself. Dark eyes glared softly at him. "You're not really being clear."

"And you act like you're more stupid than I know you are, Raito-kun." There was a clear hint of annoyance in the other's voice. Raito blinked as the other suddenly left his sitting position, rising up and walking past him without a word. The brunet blinked again before rising up and turning around.

"Ryuzaki, what-"

"You're a very cold-hearted man, Raito-kun. Even if we exclude the fact that you're a sociopathic murderer with an extremely large god-complex, you'll still be a very cold-hearted man." The raven-haired male turned away from him again and continued heading for the hall. "It's late, and I guess you have work tomorrow. It might be best if I just left now, I think…"

"Hold on." Raito stated, firmly, walking after the other at a slightly faster pace. "You're just going to end the conversation like that and **leave**?"

"That was my intention." The other male's tone was chilly, almost venomous. The tone itself made Raito annoyed. Why, he couldn't really say, but he was getting angry. He did though loosely suspect it had to do with the older male's sudden neglect towards him.

"So you're going to leave without even hearing me out?" He growled, halting his step completely. Anger was raging in him, and he felt strangely… hurt? No, that couldn't be it…

"I've heard enough coming from your lips."

Seeing red for a split second, Raito didn't even reckon as he took the last few strides and harshly gripped the other's shoulder – ignoring the sharp flinch – and turned the detective, in the same while slam him back first into the wall. He heard a frame fall down somewhere but didn't care, instead found himself glaring right into suddenly anxious obsidian eyes. Somewhere in his anger there was something else present, but that mattered little to him as he spoke out, words leaving his lips in a low tone. "You might have **heard** enough, but I sure as hell haven't **said** enough…!"

But even though he said so, he really found nothing to say. Instead he just stood there like a fool, entranced by the way the other's eyes reflected the light in an almost cat-like manner. How come he hadn't noticed that before? And how come he'd never noticed the softness of the other's hair before now, as it softly brushed against the back of his hand?

And how come he had never once mentioned that the other's exclusive looks were as alluring as they were odd?

He felt a slight tremor run through the other's body, eyes still staring at him, wide and slightly frightened. "Raito-kun…" The way Ryuzaki spoke, so soft and hushed, words barely even leaving his lips… it was barely above a sigh. "W-What are you-" Raito never got to know what the detective had been about to ask.

Because he never got a chance to finish the sentence. Raito made sure of that.

**Very** sure.

In his mind, there was no longer a question of why he was acting, why he was being so rash or why his subconscious even considered it – instead it was a question of **why** he hadn't come to this conclusion sooner.

The dark-haired male had frozen in something akin to shock at the first touch of their lips, another quiver running through his light frame. Raito glanced up to meet a mix of emotions in opaque eyes. They were shimmering just beneath the surface, but there was a hint of shock, slight anger, and something that could only be fear. But the clearest of them was the confusion. The helpless look the other gave him showed proof of it.

Pulling back slightly, he moved his hand from the other's shoulder up to raven hair, moving it away from his face tenderly and then leaned up, pressing his lips against the older male's forehead, watching in slight fascination as Ryuzaki relaxed slightly, slumping back against the wall and closing his eyes. Almost…

Almost in surrender.

Raito paused for a moment, pulling back again, his hand not leaving the other's face. Did the detective believe it to be some game…? Then he cut his thoughts. What was he doing? Why had he… he blinked and noticed that Ryuzaki had reopened his eyes, silently inquiring something. And suddenly he felt guilty. Guilty for possibly having done something like that for just the sake of fooling the other male…

But… he hadn't the intention of doing it, did he?

"Raito-kun…" He blinked again, looking up. Still so inquiring, still so confused… and he realized to himself that he hadn't been pulling one of his usual games.

Maybe he had just gotten so used to living in a façade to notice when he was actually being honest. He gave a small smile. "If you won't listen to what I say, maybe it's just easier if I just don't speak."

Ryuzaki swallowed, softly, barely noticeably, and nodded, very slightly. "…Perhaps." There was a tiny, unsure smile that accompanied that simple, whispered word, and Raito almost sighed in relief, coming to the conclusion that it didn't really matter what his true intentions about this was. At least not at this moment.

He leaned in again, slowly, not breaking eye-contact, almost as if asking for permission, receiving no answer before the other closed his eyes, closing the last distance between them. Taking that as a sign of acceptance, the brunet allowed himself to close his own eyes, pushing his hand deeper into the other's hair, taking notice in the smooth texture with slight enthralment.

If their first kiss had been a coincidence, the second an accident, and the third one just a result of annoyance, they had really passed most discomfited kisses, in his opinion. In comparison to those, this one was soft, trying. So, so very careful. It was as if both parts wanted to take a sort of lead, but didn't dare. Either that or they were both waiting. In any of the two cases it was… almost turning awkward.

Well, the entirety of the situation was awkward. Hadn't they been fighting just a while ago? Hadn't the detective had a panic attack before that? And, if he remembered correctly; hadn't they both been out in the forsaken rain at the beginning of this bizarre turn of events?

When tentative hands reached up, one gripping his shoulder as the other one cautiously weaved through his hair, the former incidents made little sense and mattered even less. All that mattered for the time being was to somehow make up for his earlier behaviour.

No scratch that. The correct term should be 'making out'.

Pulling back for air, he took a small pause to place a kiss to the other's forehead again, as he had done earlier. When he pulled back, large eyes studied him, their appearance more unclear than ever, slightly dimmed. Something pulled at him, as if he wanted to speak, but he couldn't. So he pushed it aside for the time being, leaning in to once again claim the other's lips.

Daring himself to take another step, he gently nipped the detective's bottom lip, seeking either acceptance or rejection for it, happily surprised when he met almost no resistance, save for a slight hesitation on the other's part. Ryuzaki parted his lips, and even if the response was clumsy at best, it was of no greater importance.

Their tongues met and he tasted the slight bitterness of dark chocolate, choosing to remember to buy more of it. There was also a hint of a taste of something indefinable, something that made him tilt his head slightly for better access, gently stroking the older male's tongue with his own, feeling a slight tremor that synched with a low moan emerging from the other's throat. That soft sound ignited something within him as he pressed closer, free hand placed on the wall for support.

Ryuzaki's response was surer now, more firm as the older one adapted smoothly, hand previously placed on his shoulder now moving around his neck, in order to prevent any painful outcome, as the battle of their tongues became more intense. They had passed the stage of careful testing – so now there was no need to be considerate. After all, even these things were games, and there could only be one winner.

Hands tugged painfully at his hair, pulling him back as the detective broke for air, the back of his head colliding against the wall with a small thud, but there wasn't a single hint of pain in obsidian eyes. The gaze that met his was smouldering, intense and still so alluring. There was also a slight challenge present in those eyes, reflected as clearly as the tiny smirk that was an unusual thing to see in the other's facial expression.

Raito met that challenge openly, feeling a smirk of his own pull at the corners of his lips as he narrowed his eyes slightly, a single digit travelling from the eccentric's hair down the side of his neck. Dark eyes half-closed while Ryuzaki bit his teeth together rather harshly, the fingers in the brunet's hair tightening enough for it to sting in his scalp, but that was of no concern to him. After all, this new discovery was well helpful.

He heard as much as he felt the detective's breath hitch as he placed a tiny kiss just beneath the other's ear, and he smirked against the other's skin before placing another kiss just beneath the first one. He followed the same trail his index finger had previously, just placing a light kiss once and every other inch. The other shifted slightly against the wall, but he didn't take any notice as to why before he felt a sharp nip to the shell of his ear, a short gasp tearing from his lips as he paused himself, glancing up to meet defiant black eyes.

Huffing shortly, he nipped the pale skin of the other man's neck sharply in return. Ryuzaki swallowed noticeable but didn't back down, instead also moved to the brunet's neck, biting down with slightly more force than needed. Raito hissed at the slight sting, eyes sliding shut briefly, swallowing the groan that threatened to arise from his throat.

The other must've somehow felt he had the advantage, nipping the same spot again before moving further down. Raito snapped his eyes open in alarm. He wouldn't… There was no way… Right? "Ryuzaki-…!" He wasn't given any time to finish his sentence as said detective clamped down on his neck – just above the shoulder – about hard enough to break the skin.

Groaning painfully, the brunet clenched his eyes shut, teeth gritting against each other. Then he growled angrily. Fine. Two could play that game. So he decided to return the favour, excessively.

The reaction was quite unpredictable, as the raven-haired male let out a sharp whine-like cry, letting go of the brunet's neck almost instantaneously. Instead he slumped back against the wall, breath leaving him in small gasps while his fingers sporadically clenched in his hair. Smirking at the obvious surrender the other showed, Raito bit down slightly harder, revelling the shuddering moan it caused, and then let go, licking the noticeable mark in a slight apology.

That was when he caught eye of something he hadn't noticed earlier. "Ryuzaki?"

"…Mhm?" The response was slurry, and the gaze that met his was dim.

"What is this mark?" Black eyes stared at him without seeming to understand what he said. Raito snorted and pulled down the collar of the other's shirt slightly to reveal an intricate design marked just below the juncture between the detective's clavicles.

"…" Ryuzaki didn't answer, blinking a little but seeming to have heard and understood his inquiry.

Raito sighed, and continued. "It wasn't there before you died." He had expected the eccentric to question how he would have known that, but the other just hummed approvingly. "So what is it?" He narrowed his eyes slightly as he studied it. The colour was faintly silver, and there was something spelled out inside the complex outline, but it wasn't anything he could read.

"I received it when I became a human tenshi." Ryuzaki said, soberly. "It's a sort of… contract, if you wish."

"Contract?"

"These powers aren't for free, Raito-kun." The detective straightened up, pushing him away slightly. "Everyone has to give up something in order to get them."

"And in your case…?" Raito narrowed his eyes slightly.

"It's a highly personal thing, Raito-kun, and nothing that I wish to share with you at this time." The tone had turned cold again, but it was more of a bitter cold than a dismissing one. Dark eyes flicked to the time. "I really ought to leave now."

"…" He could say something really cheesy and make the other stay, and he was surely considering it, but instead he just nodded. "I guess so… it seems the rain has stopped."

"That's a relief." Ryuzaki flicked a few stray strands of hair out of his eyes. "I would hate to get wet again."

"Are you sure you'll be fine? It's rather cold…" Raito trailed off for a second before speaking up again, moving some brown hair behind his ear. "I could drive you, if you'd like?"

Ryuzaki shook his head. "That wouldn't be fair of me. I've been too much of a nuisance already." He looked around and found his sneakers, casually stepping into them without even tying them. Just as he had always done.

Stopping at the door, black eyes looked back at him. "…Goodnight."

He gave a small smile in return. "Goodnight."

There was a slight hesitation on the other's part, hand resting on the door handle for a faint second before pushing it down. Giving him one last glance, the detective stepped out into the chilly August night, the door falling shut behind him.

Raito stood motionless, the events starting to re-approach him now that he was alone and capable of going through them. For a few seconds he was frozen.

Then he cursed. Loudly.

He noticed his own reflection in the mirror and glared at it. In the name of whatever was holy, what was he doing!? He had all this time been focused on finding out as much as possible about the tenshi and the revivals, and then kill L, in whatever way was achievable at that time.

He had definitely **not** planned on making out with him in the hallway of his own residence! And even less to actually enjoy it.

"This isn't good…" He growled, narrowing his eyes even more at the mirror, angry that it challenged him back. Why the hell was he so stupid? Why was he all set on making this even **more** complicated than it already was!? He hit his own forehead. Hard. "Damn you… Damn you L…!" He growled, hitting himself again. "Damn you…"

Damn you for getting under my skin.

He sighed heavily, staring at his reflection again, eyes seeking themselves to the mark on his neck, clearly visible. Cursing softly, he looked more at it, gingerly touching it with his hand. From the looks of it, it was definitely going to bruise.

Just great.

He snorted and twisted around, heading back towards the living room. He just had to think this through – **rationally**. There must be someway to straighten this up again. Or perhaps some way to make some sort of compromise?

He halted. Compromise? What was he saying? He wanted to kill L, didn't he? Or had he inexplicably had a change of heart in the last hour?

He reached his hand up to his face, index finger gently touching his lips, recalling the bittersweet taste that still lingered on them. Then he blinked, dropped his hand, and groaned heavily as he turned and slammed his head into the nearest wall.

Somewhere in the house another frame fell to the floor, with an interesting sound of glass shattering against the wooden floor.

And in his mind, he wished that the image of the raven-haired detective would shatter the same way. But as it seemed, things didn't want to go his way this day.

And the image stayed.

**Woah. That chapter took AGES, but it was fun to write. Last time I ever wrote a scene between two boys was July last year. Which, to me, is quite a long time ago. So I might be a bit rusty, but I hope you're okay with how it turned out **

**Until next time!**

**/Keyhala**


	13. Chapter 13

**Warning:** **Both disclaimer and story include spoilers up to and including volume 7! After that, not even I know what happens, but if you haven't read volume 7, and don't want to know major spoilers – do NOT read. If you don't mind spoilers or have already read, then please go ahead **

**Okay, this is the last chapter for today – we are now up to all chapters I have written so far xD So we have caught up to P So now you have to wait JUST as long as they have to**

**But I won't hold you up longer – I guess you're all waiting to read this next chapter! Go ahead! Just read this one little note I have to write:**

**NOTE:** **This chapter contains slight 'altering' of the Christian Religion (More clearly; I create my own version of it's 'birth'). This is not meant to be offensive, but just used because I think it fits the story. If this is a touchy subject for any of you, I apologize but ask that you can look upon it objectively **

**Disclaimer:** **I do not own Death Note or any of its Characters. If I did, L would never have died and There would've been a lot more yaoi laugh**

**Summary:** **In the year 2010, Kira's will has almost become the law. Raito has no more competition as the chief inspector of the NPA. Even if the role of 'L' was relinquished a year earlier, at the same time as Near and Mello got wiped from history, he has no problem, since he holds the entire police force of Japan, as well as well as the role of the worlds 'saviour', Kira. There are slight complications with the now upcoming discussions about disbanding the police, but he doesn't see it as a long-term problem.**

**Everything seems to be going fine, up until Friday the thirteenth of August, when something pretty unpredictable happens. One of the newly dead criminals, who got killed by Kira's judgement, suddenly reawakens on the hospital, three hours after her death. Shocked at this information, Raito decides to get information from the woman. But she has no memories of her life whatsoever, only her name, age and a cryptic phrase; "_Once is once – but everyone gains a second chance." _**

**Deciding to go home to think the entire situation over, he finds another shocking surprise waiting. For if a woman who has been dead can reawaken… then why couldn't also someone else?**

**Warnings:** **Yaoi (malexmale), Violence, Language**

**Well, with that in mind, why don't we get started? And my dears, please don't forget to review It would make a poor authoresses' day if you could take the time to write a decent review! Tell me what you think **

Chapter 13

"_And behold, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you shall name Him Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High; and the Lord God will give Him the throne of His father David; and He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and His kingdom will have no end."_ He read aloud, yet barely audible as his eyes flicked over the screen.

"Yagami-kun?" He blinked, barely concealing his surprise as he turned his head up to meet the eyes of the person he least of all wanted to see at the moment.

"What is it, Hanaya-san?" He asked, subconsciously fixing the collar of his shirt.

"I have some reports that Matsuda-san wanted me to give you." She exclaimed, proudly, dropping a stack of papers on his desk. Raito sighed softly, pinching the bridge of his nose in slight annoyance. "Ah, I didn't know you were religious, Yagami-kun." He started again, casting the female a slight glare as she had somehow rounded his desk without his notice, reading the document over his shoulder.

"I'm not." He finalized. "It's merely for investigational purposes." For emphasis, he also closed the window, leaving a completely blank document. The female officer hummed softly in acknowledgment, but he noticed the certain tone that he knew people used when they said something they definitively did not think. And the fact that she used it so obviously irritated him. "Was there anything more you wanted?"

"Not really…" She drew the word out, almost as if she was pausing for something else. He felt like slapping his forehead. If she was going to ask him out again, he feared that he wouldn't let her live for long. How long would it take for her to get the fact that she was of **no** interest for him?

"If so, I suggest you head back to your department. The board is doing a lot of checkups to see which employees that will have to get fired at the end of the month. It would be a shame if you got fired because you stayed around here too much." He kept his voice in a silky tone, giving a small smile that was as fake as could be, but she blushed deeply and nodded.

"R-Right. I understand that… I just wondered if… if you're currently seeing someone?" Same as always. This was getting too much… however… He frowned softly, masking a soft smirk.

"Well…" He stretched slightly, tilting his head to the side as he deftly scratched the back of his neck. He purposely folded down the collar of his shirt as he drew his hand back, noting the slight widening of her eyes and taking it as a sign she had noticed. "…I guess you could say that."

Her eyes still widened, she nodded quickly again. "O-Okay… I'll… I'll see you around." She swiftly turned and left the office, steps more hurried than he'd ever seen them.

Snickering, he moved his hand to his neck again, frowning softly as he put some pressure on the bruised area. A week and it still hadn't vanished. Folding up his collar again, he sighed and cast the stack of papers a look. He really didn't feel like reading the reports now. And even so, it was almost four, so his shift was just about over. He decided on bringing them home and if he felt like it, he'd look at them in the evening. But the last week, he hadn't really been much for doing the work he'd been presented with.

Strange? Not really. He shook his head and collected the papers in his briefcase. He clasped it shut and stretched. He cast one look to his computer screen. No emails. Snorting, he shut the machine off. He was angered.

Nothing. No emails, no calls, no sign of life.

Nothing.

But he was even more angered at his own annoyance over these petty things. It was childish, unfocused and not in his character. Definitively not. He wasn't the person to get hooked up on certain happenings unless it was of fatal value to him – which rarely happened. More frequently the last month than the previous years, but still rarely.

He glanced over his shoulder at the shinigami, who was silent. Ryuk had chuckled slightly when he had fooled Hanaya, but not laid any comment on Raito's 'research'. "You're quiet today, Ryuk." Truth was that the shinigami had been awfully quite the entire week that had passed. "Not a single comment?"

"What is there to comment on?" Was the answer, clearly inquiring.

"My research." He shrugged. "Usually you ask me about my different investigations, but this time there was nothing. Either you don't care for it, or you know exactly why I do it."

"So it's either-or, eh?" Ryuk followed him as he left the office, giving Isao-san a slight nod on his way out in the main hallway.

"Actually," Raito continued in a low voice, "I'm quite certain that it **is** because you know why I do it. Which leads me to the conclusion that I am on the right track,"

"That doesn't tell me anything, Raito."

"Approximately two-thousand years ago, you had a war with the tenshi. And just about two-thousand years ago, according to scriptures, a man with amazing skills in healing and other 'magic' appeared. To be honest… as it is said he was able to raise the dead, and tenshi are mentioned in the texts, I have a suspicion it has to do with your little war." He paused. "Or your war broke out after his death. Either-or."

"…" The shinigami was silent for a while, before chuckling, lowly. "You are too smart for your own good, Raito. But I believe you'd better not read too much into this."

"Of course not." He snorted. "I have to stay objective. And it's only speculations. I'll try and get the answers I want once the opportunity shows itself." He nodded to a few of the other employees as he passed and left the building, a ray of sunlight hitting his face, causing him to curse inaudibly and turn his eyes down. Couldn't the stupid weather just decide!? At the moment it swayed from autumn back to summer and to autumn again. And the frequent changes of temperature were what caused these thunderstorms to appear.

Of course, there hadn't been any thunderstorms since the one last Monday, but with the recent changes, there was a risk that one would occur soon. And somewhere in the back of his head, there was something that made him glad about it, in contradiction to himself.

Groaning, he slapped his forehead. This was **not** the time to start an argument with himself about whether or not he liked the fact that the weather was being as undecided as Raito himself. This really had to come to some sort of conclusion.

"Is something wrong?" He glanced up at Ryuk as he headed for the car.

"No, nothing. Just thought of something stupid."

"You? Thinking of something stupid?" The shinigami chuckled. "That was a new one." Deciding to ignore the god of death, Raito unlocked the car, but stayed outside it for a moment, glancing up at the clear sky. Then he frowned, as a sudden thought snuck into his mind.

Just what was the detective up to now? And not a general 'now' but **right** now, at this very second.

He snorted, shaking his head as he got into the car, starting the engine. Probably eating sweets. It was really hard to figure Ryuzaki doing anything else than eating or typing away on a computer. Not that he **wanted** to figure anything different at all… obviously.

Driving out of the parking lot, he glanced in the rear-view mirror at the shinigami. "I just remembered I'm out of some groceries. So we're just going to take a small detour to the grocery store."

"Sure." Ryuk shrugged, before blinking. "I'm out of apples."

"Apples are a part of groceries, Ryuk." He said, calmly, while switching gears as he turned left.

** DeathNote **

"Let's see…" He feigned thought as he stood by the fruits section, in reality waiting for Ryuk to choose which sort of apples he wanted. The shinigami was very indecisive, and it was annoying. Glancing at his watch, the brunet sighed. "Hard time choosing today, don't we…" He muttered, barely audible enough for the shinigami to hear.

Catching the angered tone, Ryuk pointed to one of the kinds, a bright red sort, and Raito sighed in relief, picking out seven apples and placing them with the other groceries. Okay, he still had to get rice noodles, and then he was set. And it had **only** taken forty minutes so far. He rolled his eyes and continued towards the right section.

"Rice noodles…" He muttered to himself, following the shelves. He stopped up as he almost bumped into two young girls, about the age of fourteen. He excused himself and passed them, taking notice that one of them reminded him of Sayu when she was in that age. The only exception was the duller look in her eyes.

He almost dropped the package of noodles he picked out as their silent conversation reached his ears.

"Come on, Yuna, it's only a package of cup ramen."

"But, but… Shana… you know what… what will happen!"

"_He_ won't find out. Mom was careless… is all…"

"She did also 'only' steal food for the day, Shana… we can't! We'll get killed for sure!"

"It's either this or starving." The first girl hissed, and took the package and placed it inside her jacket. They didn't take more notice of Raito's presence as he placed his package with the other groceries, watching them as they hurried out. As they passed the cashier, the alarm went off – as predicted.

The two girls ignored the shouts and kept running. As they were rather small, they vanished in the crowd on the street. He followed their movement until he couldn't see them anymore – but he didn't move a muscle.

Their frightened conversation still lingered on his mind.

"_Come on, Yuna, it's only a package of cup ramen."_

"_Shana… we can't! We'll get killed for sure!"_

Raito blinked once, one hand coming up to cover his face. Damnit… Damnit…

Why hadn't he seen this before? And even worse…

"_Only the evildoers would fear. All the innocent stand free, and they don't fear me."_

"_Do they not?" L glanced at him, questioningly. "Perhaps you should use your ears and listen, Raito-kun. Don't sit on the top of your supremacy and believe that you know everything. Sometimes it can be a good thing to listen."_

... Ryuzaki had known all along…

"Raito?"

He ignored the shinigami and stormed to the cashier.

** DeathNote **

He understood the widened look in the detective's eyes as he had opened the door. He probably looked like a downright mess. "Raito-kun…?" The words were soft-spoken and hesitant, slightly inquiring with a small hint of wonder.

"…Can I come in…?" Raito asked, not really meeting Ryuzaki's eyes. The raven-haired one blinked once but stepped aside. He passed the older male and heard him close the door after him.

"…W-What are you doing here?"

That was indeed a good question. He didn't really have an answer to it, even if he thought about it. He hadn't thought much on the way, merely parked his car and told the shinigami to stay there. Ryuk hadn't complained, as he seemed generally confused with the brunet's behaviour.

And he had to admit, he even confused himself. He had almost run into a total of three people on his way towards the hotel, and then another two when he was inside. He hadn't even waited on the elevator; instead he opted for taking the stairs because of his hurry.

He still hadn't figured out why he had headed to the detective's hotel room as he knocked on the door. And he still didn't.

The black-eyed detective waited patiently, but he gave no answer. Ryuzaki sighed, and walked past him. "Never mind…"

Raising his gaze, blinking in confusion, he spoke up. "…Never mind?"

"If Raito-kun does not wish to share his reason for visiting that is fine." L answered, sitting down on the sofa and picking up a single slice of kiwi from the cake on the table. While speaking up again, he reached for the remote of the TV. "Therefore I won't insist on hearing the reason."

Arching a questioning eyebrow, Raito let his shoulders slump slightly, feeling stupid. He brushed some hair out of his eyes and sighed. "I… don't know, that's all."

"That's a very unusual thing when Raito-kun is concerned." L pointed out, calmly.

"Indeed it is." Feeling strangely exhausted, he sat down next to Ryuzaki, resting his elbows on his knees as he his face in his hands for a second, sighing as he pulled them through his hair over to the back of his neck, before sitting up straight again. He noticed an inquiring black look in the detective's dark eyes and answered, "Just a stressful day."

"Hard day at work?" The other asked wistfully. "And I thought the Japanese police enforcement was considered still at the moment."

"It wasn't work – even though there is the obligatory paperwork – that was the hard part today." He laughed shortly, shaking his head as the scene at the grocery store was repeated before his eyes. He shrugged the uncomfortable feeling off.

"I see." Ryuzaki replied curtly, nodding before turning his eyes towards the screen again, squinting slightly as he switched channel. Raito frowned again. Still no further questions?

As the other sighed and switched channel again, he couldn't help but raising his voice again. "What are you looking for?"

"Hm?" Penetrating black eyes turned towards him for a second before looking back at the TV. "There was an interesting news report here just ten minutes ago; I thought they might air it again."

Raito froze, eyes widening slightly as something gripped at him. Ten minutes ago? There was no way…

"…Usually **all** the channels air them for an eternity an- oh, here we go." Ryuzaki set down the remote, picking up the small platter with cake and took a bite.

Reluctantly, expecting the worst, Raito turned his eyes to the television.

And started. "What-…"

"Quite shocking, isn't it?" Ryuzaki murmured, taking another piece of cake.

Raito shook his head. "No… that's not it…"

"Hm?"

The brunet stared at the headlined text. It was perfectly clear to him that it was about the two girls he had seen in the grocery store, Shiroku Shana and Yuna – fourteen years of age. But according to this…

"…T-This is a lie." According to the report, they had stolen all the money from the cashier and killed her in the process.

"_It's only a package of cup ramen."_

"What do you mean, Raito-kun?" L asked, setting the cake down. "This is from the same reporters who usually give you your information for the criminals you judge. How could it be wrong?" There was a hint in the other's voice, which irritated him, but at the same time he couldn't break away from the panic in his mind.

"…They didn't kill anyone, nor did they steal money…" He then forced out, voice strained.

"…" L didn't answer, just gave him a blank look.

"They took a package of cup ramen without paying." Raito continued. "I saw them… that was all there was to it."

"That's media in short, Raito-kun." The dark-haired detective sighed and turned the television off. "A package of cup ramen doesn't give them any big news, but juvenile criminals killing a cashier and fleeing with the money turns the whole world to them – and their divine god will help them get the news to be even more interesting."

"Y-You mean to say-"

"Just because the law of the **world** has 'changed', doesn't mean that the media will follow those rules." L sighed softly. "Media's greatest pursuit has always been getting the most viewers. Always."

Raito stared blankly at him, as if not processing what the older man had just said. But it started to slowly puzzle together in his mind. This didn't have to be the first time. There could have been others – several others – who had been framed by the media into something that looked clearly evil…

And these girls… they had only done it to get food for the day.

He suddenly felt nauseous, head spinning as the information began to sink in. And he questioned himself – over and over – how many human lives had been framed like this?

And how many times had he fallen for it?

He was almost certain he was going to faint – or at the very least throw up – when a light touch to his face made him look up, meeting the concerned gaze of the one he had so long called his nemesis. "Raito-kun, are you alright?"

He realized he was shaking severely, and swallowed once, vision edging in black. "I…" He choked on his words, feeling all energy he had left leave his body, and could faintly see the other's eyes widen before his consciousness slipped.

** DeathNote **

He didn't know what had forced him to jolt awake, consciousness returning as quickly as a clash of thunder. His brown eyes widened as the room spun for an ominous second before his balance returned.

He blinked, confounded at first. He was certainly not at home… and… He glanced towards the wall to his right. Computers… He frowned, and moved towards the edge of the bed, still not grasping the situation.

But the situation grasped him.

He stopped up as a grip on his left wrist stopped him from moving. He turned his head quickly towards the obstacle and blinked again. What. The-…

Then he smiled. Now wasn't this a rare sight?

The detective was curled up in a defensive manner, knees drawn up to his chest and head leaning towards them. One hand was carefully tucked in between, thumb gently pressed against pale lips. The other hand, however, was holding the brunet's wrist in a deathly grip.

But the most proficient reason for Raito's smile was not the defensiveness of the other.

It was because the detective was asleep, piercing eyes hidden beneath closed eyelids, breath coming out in deep, regular interludes. And his facial expression was soft, almost content – a small smile was playing on L's lips, as if something pleased him greatly. All in all, the raven-haired male looked more relaxed and content than he'd ever seen him.

But the sight also made him wonder what time it really was. How long had he been out? He lifted his arm to take a look at his watch, squinting slightly to be able to see. His suspicion had been right. Half past three. He sighed.

So he had two problems at hand. One, it was very late and Ryuk wouldn't be pleased with having to wait. Two, he couldn't get his wrist free. He didn't want to be too harsh, as he figured that he shouldn't wake the detective.

Frowning softly, he tried to gently pull at his left hand, but the instead of releasing it, the sleeping man just gripped it tighter, muttering something incoherent under his breath before settling again. Raito noticed he'd been holding his breath and let it out, frown deepening. He'd have to try a different approach…

His next attempt was trying to gingerly pry the other's fingers away from his wrist, trying to hold on to his patience. But Ryuzaki was as strong asleep as he was awake, so that attempt didn't work so well either. Deep in thought, he put one hand to his face, suppressing a heavy sigh. What now…

He glanced at his watch again. Already twenty to four. He **really** had to leave. Which left him with only one option. Sighing to himself, he reached over with his free hand and shook the detective slightly. "Ryuzaki."

L frowned softly, a slightly displeased look on his face as he shifted away from the brunet's touch. "…Nhn-…" As soon as he'd shifted away, the peaceful expression returned to the raven-haired male's face, breathing evening out again.

Gritting his teeth, Raito shook the detective again. "Ryuzaki." He added a more firm tone to his voice, hoping to wake him. "Hey, Ryuzaki!"

As he still got no response, he growled softly under his breath. It seemed that L, to counterweight his short sleeping time, slept like a damned rock. Just great. In a frustrated attempt, he pulled harshly at his wrist, hoping that the rash movement would force the sleeping man to let go. But once again, he was proved wrong as L's response was pulling the brunet's wrist closer to himself, causing Raito to loose his balance slightly, putting down his right hand to the bed to steady himself. "This is ridiculous-" He cut himself of as the sleeping detective murmured something in his sleep, nuzzling against the captivated hand with that same content smile.

Raito suddenly found his breath caught in his throat, and swallowed. Feeling a blush threatening to arise, he huffed at himself, once again trying to free his hand. Shifting as to regain his balance completely, he pushed at the detective's shoulder with his right hand, almost angrily. "Ryuzaki!"

Ryuzaki frowned deeply, making a disgruntled sound in the back of his throat as he once again pulled away from the rough shaking. Only this time, dark eyes blinked open, even if ever so slowly. At first, unfocused and dim, they just stared blankly at him before they focused on his eyes, their owner blinking sharply, a slight flicker of panic fleeing through black eyes before the detective seemed to grasp the situation. "…Raito-kun."

"Good morning." He said, through slightly gritted teeth.

"Is something the matter?" The inquiry was soft, and slightly confused, as Ryuzaki most likely hadn't fully woken up yet.

"I have to leave. It's far too late." Raito explained, and tugged on his left hand. "And you're keeping my left hand hostage." L blinked and glanced down, staring at his own hand quizzically before – slowly – letting the captured hand go.

"…Sorry." Sincerity. The raven-haired male's voice showed nothing but sincerity, and Raito couldn't help but smile.

"It's okay." He assured, rubbing his left wrist subconsciously. He then drew his hand through his hair, as he moved to the edge of the bed, feet barely getting to touch the carpet before his left wrist was caught – again. "…Ryuzaki?" The look in the other's eyes was confused, black eyes focusing on the raven-haired male's own hand. And Raito blinked, recognizing the look. It was the same sort of feeling in L's eyes as he had felt that time when he had grabbed the detective's wrist at a parting. The feeling of not wanting to let the other leave… "I have to go. I have work in less than five hours."

"It's closer to walk from here?" Why pose it as a question? It was a known fact. But just because the detective chose to put it as a question, it made him seem hesitant… almost cute. Wait, backtrack. Hesitant, yes. Cute… He wasn't even going to mull over it.

"I have the car; it'll take just as much time as getting to work from my place."

"…It's too late to be out driving?"

"Try 'too early', if something." L blinked once and cast his eyes downwards, sighing softly as he let go of his hand.

"I guess that's right…" Disappointment, this time. Raito tilted his head snorting softly.

"Besides, Ryuk would kill me. He'll probably throw a fit already, since I left him in the car." He glanced at the other man, noting that Ryuzaki was nervously nipping at his thumb, still lying down. "…Sorry."

"…" Black eyes looked up at him again, inquiringly. "I understand. Forget that I even tried."

Raito frowned. There was a clear disappointed edge in the other's voice. And he, himself, really didn't feel like driving through Tokyo at four in the morning. Ryuk had probably left the car already, he also figured. In addition, he still needed some information and wasn't really tired anymore.

However… he had to stay with his initial thought. As he'd said before, second-guessing himself wouldn't lead to anything. So he stood up, brushing some hair out of his face, and then headed for the door. As he opened it, he heard the bed creak and turned his head to notice the detective rising up as well.

And stretched.

He blinked as he froze for a second, watching Ryuzaki's back straightening out and arch back slightly, arms stretched above his head, eyes closed. Dropping his arms, the detective proceeded with moving his head over from left to right shoulder, his neck giving some cracking noises. Scratching his neck, L resumed his original stance, slouching slightly again as he walked up to him.

He met Raito's questioning glance and shrugged. "Thought I'd follow you to the door."

"…Can you straighten up again?"

"Hm?" Obsidian eyes blinked close for a split second before refocusing on him.

Raito motioned slightly with his right hand. "Stand up straight." He hadn't really thought the other **could** straighten by the way he walked. He had no composure at all, so it was… odd, unknown.

"My back wouldn't really approve of that." Ryuzaki mentioned. "I only stretch after sleeping, and even at that time it shows its discontent."

The brunet frowned in a disappointed manner. "Please?"

The raven-haired man gave him a weird look but then shrugged. "If Raito-kun insists…" Rolling his shoulders back slightly, the detective straightened – with an audible cracking noise from his never-endingly abused spine – and Raito found to his surprise that instead of looking down to meet the other's eyes, he had to lift his gaze about a quarter of an inch.

"You're tall." He commented, as he didn't really find anything else to say. L shrugged, once again returning to his usual slouched composure, looking only slightly bothered.

"When I looked through your files all those years ago, I noticed we were the same height."

"…I never thought of it before – because of how you hold yourself." Raito mentioned, blinking.

"I look shorter than I am, as well as younger than I am. Is that supposed to be flattering or offensive?"

"That's all in the eye of the beholder, I'd say." Raito shrugged, pushing the door open and walking out into the other room, just as dark as the first. He flipped the switch and found the room bathing in light, the change first stinging at his eyes. Striding towards the door, he felt a slight pull at his heart, a little towards two directions. But he didn't mention it, thinking of it as caused by a streak of tiredness. However, when he gathered his shoes, placing them by the door while pulling on his jacket, the feeling got more determined.

Pulling up the zipper of his jacket, he regarded the detective again, having noticed his near-frantic chewing at the pad of his thumb. "It'll bleed again if you keep that up." Black eyes blinked, glancing down at the raw-bitten thumb in curiosity. At seeing the state of it, Ryuzaki frowned and dropped the hand to his side, instead lifting his other hand to rub at his neck. Honestly, did the detective have to **constantly** do something?

He did, for a split second, notice the slight purple hue of the bruise on the other's neck, and subconsciously lifted his hand to his own, adding a slight amount of pressure to remind himself that it was still there. Their eyes met and they froze. An uncomfortable silence followed, in which they continuously stared at one another, before Raito coughed and dropped his hand.

"Well, then…" He gave a small motion with his hand again, searching for words. But before he could continue, he noticed a slightly annoyed look in the other's eyes and arched a brow. Within a second, the detective had stepped up to him, and was now tugging at the zipper of his jacket. "Wha-?"

"Your shirt has gotten caught in the zipper, Raito-kun." L explained, with a slight hint of annoyance that Raito couldn't understand. "It would be a shame if you ripped it because of that…"

Swallowing softly, Raito gave a short nod; suddenly feeling very awkward as he looked over towards the window, trying to ignore the fact that the other's aggravated breathing was fleeing over the skin of his neck. "…R-Ryuzaki… I could fix that myself…"

"I am aware of that, Raito-kun, however-…" L cut himself off, letting go of the brunet's jacket after pulling up the zipper again. "There…" They fell into silence again, neither of them saying a word for a short while.

"…However?" Raito tried, as he looked down at the detective.

"Nothing." A slight flush of embarrassment was present on the otherwise pale skin, and Raito snickered softly, having by now realized that the detective had spoken before he'd thought. Ryuzaki huffed in response, taking half a step back and casting him a glare. "I do not see what you find so amusing, Raito-kun."

"It's not often one sees you speak before having carefully thought it through first."

L pouted, narrowing his eyes further. "I am still human, and humans have the tendency to speak before they think."

"So I've come to know." He paused again, still standing his ground. He knew that for him to be able to leave, he had to put on his shoes. So why was he just standing here like some idiot? "So…" once again, the other stepped that half of a step back up to him, this time messing with his collar. "What now…?"

"You collar is flipped." Ryuzaki said, matter-of-factly, but didn't move away once the problem had been corrected. Instead he leaned his forehead against the brunet's shoulder. "It's four in the morning, Raito-kun. It'll take you fifteen minutes home, which will mean that you won't have any time to sleep since you usually go up at half past five and get yourself in order, am I not correct?"

"True. But I don't see why that is a problem. I have slept for quite some time, so I'll be fine."

"…Of course." Even if the conversation was for the time over, the detective didn't move an inch.

"I really have to head home now, Ryuzaki."

"I can answer questions?" Again, a question. But it made him falter slightly. He did need answers to some of his inquiries, as well as his current thesis, in order to move forward…

"Ryuzaki…"

"Okay, okay…" The raven-haired male sighed, and took a step back, nipping at his thumb again. "Fine-…" Then he flinched, and Raito had to blink one time before realizing what had happened, as the detective stared at his thumb, red staining his lips.

"I **told** you that it was bound to happen…" He muttered, taking the other's abused hand. "You bit the hangnail off." He then stated, shaking his head.

"…" Ryuzaki gave his injured thumb a pitiful look, pouting softly again. That damn pout… Raito sighed and released the other's hand.

"Get a bandage on it, I guess it stings."

"Rather much so." L replied with a hurt look in his eyes, mixed with disbelief, as if he was confused as to why it had happened. "I've never done that before… bitten through the skin… sure… but…" Still looking confused, he dropped the hand to his side. "I held you up again, sorry."

"I'm starting to believe you're doing it on purpose." Not only starting to believe – he knew. Question was just why. Was it really that important that he stayed? Or was it just because the detective liked to annoy him? Or was it simply because of a reason he didn't understand?

"If so, then I apologize." Black eyes averted to the ground, and Raito noticed L lifting his injured hand to his mouth again. Honestly…

He grabbed it and sighed. "Stop it. You're going to make it worse."

"…Sorry." Ryuzaki blinked at his hand, then up at the brunet. "It's just the force of habit…"

Force of habit. If you thought of it that way, Everytime they met, they spoke about something vital to this current situation. Maybe not this **exact** current situation… but nevertheless… He noted the other was worrying his lower lip with his teeth, probably as a substitute to biting on his thumb, and growled, pushing the other against the wall to his left. "Stop it!"

Wincing only slightly, L peered at him through black bangs. "I do not understand what you mean, Raito-kun." And he was still biting his lip.

"Is it really that important that I stay?" He demanded, eyes narrowing.

"I think that question is directed at both you and me, Raito-kun." The older man quipped. "I can offer answers, but if you don't wish to get your answers, then-…"

"Shut up." He growled, and crushed his lips against the other's to silence him. Honestly – first trying to desperately keep him there, and then go on about how it was really up to **him**? That was just so- so-

So typically L.

The thought almost made him smirk, but instead he just pushed the other harder into the wall, hearing the detective's breath rip from his throat in a slightly pained gasp, something Raito promptly ignored as he tilted his head, using Ryuzaki's short-lived shock as a chance to slip his tongue into the other's mouth. Black eyes widened for a second before sliding shut as L supposedly recovered from his frozen state, pushing back against him, tongue meeting his in something that could nearly seem like desperation as the detective's free hand grabbed his shoulder, the other still stuck between the brunet's hand and the wall.

Pulling back as air seemed more sufficient, he leaned his forehead against Ryuzaki's, eyes locking with amused black pools. "Fine. I'll stay. If we talk, that is."

"…If I'm not completely mistaken," L replied with an amused smile tugging at his lips, "Raito-kun doesn't seem in the mood for talking."

Scowling slightly, Raito narrowed his eyes, not at all amused by the detective's taunt. Huffing, he pushed with his free hand against the wall to straighten up, but was stopped by the hand on his shoulder, the raven-haired male keeping him there, gaze earnest as he tilted his head in inquiry of the brunet's actions. "Your attempt at being funny is about as good as your attempt at being cute."

"Which would mean it was a very good attempt." The detective chimed back, smile adorning pale lips. Raito scowled again, realizing the fatal error in his own attempt at being serious. He should have chosen his words better, he mentioned to himself, only to fall out of his stupor at the touch of the other's lips again his. The contact was faint, fleeting and short, and as L pulled back, barely an inch, black eyes still looked at him, still so very intensely.

That honest look made him angry, in a strange way, and he didn't conceal the angry scowl even when he leaned in to capture the other's lips again, teeth nipping L's bottom lip sharply as he tilted his head and deepened the kiss, feeling the hand that had clenched his shoulder now come to rest against his neck.

Stroking the other's tongue with his own, he relished in the soft noise the other emerged from the back of his throat, fingernails scraping against his skin as the detectives hand clenched slightly. He felt a sudden desire to draw more sounds of that nature from the raven-haired man and without even thinking of it; he lifted his unoccupied hand to Ryuzaki's neck, scraping the nail of his index finger gently against the skin just beneath the other's ear, swallowing the choked gasp that was the immediate response to the simple touch.

Smirking, he shifted slightly to gain a more comfortable position, but froze instantly as the movement caused their hips to brush together just faintly, a sudden near-electric jolt ripping through him as he broke the kiss, eyes widening. Glazed obsidian eyes opened, giving him an almost blank look, but something flickered behind the almost flawless façade.

Raito tried pushing away once more, face flushing in embarrassment, realizing that this was threading onto territory he didn't wish to enter, but stopped up at a soft, questioning sound the detective let out. He glanced up; both hands planted against the wall, and met the same question in black eyes. A question which didn't need words. The question his mother often asked him when he was acting abnormally.

_What is wrong?_

"…This… this means nothing." He muttered, averting eyes, once again trying to push away from the wall. "It's… accidental-"

"Raito-kun is not as good of a liar as I gave him credit for." The firmly quipped statement broke him off, and he immediately glared at the other, meeting an equally narrowed gaze. L clicked his tongue once before continuing. "Or he's just better at deceiving himself than others."

"Say what!?"

"Or maybe he just finds it extremely amusing to play around with other human's feelings. Though, I guess we've already concluded that so is the case." The brunet suddenly recognized the emotion that simmered just beneath the surface of the other's eyes.

Hurt.

A little taken aback, he subconsciously altered his confusion into something else. Angrily, he gripped the other's shoulders and slammed him backwards into the wall once. "Maybe you should just stop messing with my mind!"

Blinking once, the detective's features now merely showed surprise. "I'm afraid I do not understand what Raito-kun is trying to say."

Why did L have to be so **frustrating**? "What I'm trying to say is; you're playing this odd little game of yours, trying to mess with my mind, and then try to push it all onto me – as if I am the one at fault!"

"If I don't remember it wrongly, Raito-kun has always been the one with the initiative."

"…!" Gritting his teeth, he gripped Ryuzaki's shoulder tighter, wanting to slam him into the wall again, but in the end he let go, head falling forward to rest on the raven-haired man's shoulder. L let out a soft noise of inquiry, stiffening for a second before relaxing. "You're… infuriating." Raito concluded, still gritting his teeth.

"…So I've been told by many people – Raito-kun is not the first one to deduce that." Slim hands came to rest upon his back, one closer to his neck, fingertips gently rubbing at the bruise which still stung slightly at the touch.

"…This isn't how it's supposed to be." Raito continued, stiffening in anger. "I'm supposed to kill you, damn it!" The ministrations at his neck ceased for a moment as L sighed, softly.

"It's a pity that Raito-kun feels that way." Raito's breath hitched as the detective leaned in, gently licking at the bruise with his tongue, the careful gesture sending shivers down his spine. He tried pushing against the other's shoulder to get away, but found that his arms didn't want to cooperate with his initial thought.

"…S-Stop it…"

"Stop?" L questioned, pulling back. "I will, if that's what you wish… However…" A strangled groan found its way out from his throat as the older man's hips timidly thrust against his, hearing a responsive whimper as he subconsciously returned the favour. "…I do get the feeling that you're being in a contradiction with yourself…"

He didn't know if it was because it was early in the morning and he wasn't thinking clearly, or if there was just some truth in what the other said – or even because of a completely different reason, but he found his breathing altering into a ragged panting, a hazy feeling settling over his entire being while he turned his head slightly, nipping softly at the exposed skin of Ryuzaki's neck. "…Says the man who's a living contradiction…"

Hearing the other suck in a breath, he nipped further, teeth scraping against the other's pulse and smirking softly as the action was met with a strangled hiss. "…Perhaps I am, if that's Raito-kun's opinion…"

"It is." He concluded, nipping harder in order to throw the other's seriousness off. Sometimes the detective's all-too-calm demeanour frustrated him more than usual. And this was one of those times.

"Weren't you the one who wanted to talk, Raito-!" The honorific never passed L's lips as Raito, in his annoyance, ground against the detective's thin hips, forcing the broken sentence to end in a choked cry, Ryuzaki ripping his head away from the brunet's shoulder as his hands tightened over the back of Raito's shirt. The tremor that coursed through the other's body made Raito look up, noting the way L's eyes were clenched shut, teeth tightly gritted together as he tried to suppress a second shudder from breaking through.

Hearing his name – **only** his name – without that annoying honorific, spoken in that breathless tone made his breath hitch in an utmost interesting way, and he growled in the back of his throat as he pushed against the raven-haired male again, stifling his groan by biting the pale neck, eyes shutting on their own accord at the sound of his nemesis gasping his name.

Somewhere among the line, he had completely forgot his initial thought, as well as his previous concerns about his strange behaviour when considering the detective, but that didn't faze him as he moved his hands in order for them to steady him better. One slim hand travelled from his back up to his chin, lifting it in order for Ryuzaki to initiate an open-mouthed kiss, tongues clashing together almost desperately.

His entire being felt warm, and the fact that he was still wearing his jacket wasn't really helping the situation. With an annoyed growl, he took away one hand from the wall to fumble with the zipper of the jacket, pulling it down with some trouble, but was grateful when the detective assisted him with sliding the offending garment off his shoulders to fall to the floor.

Despite him not quelling the hazy, growing warmth spreading through his body, the jacket's restriction had at least been taken care off, and now nimble fingers were working on the top buttons of his shirt. Breaking the kiss to allow the other to focus more on the task at hand, he leaned up and placed a tiny kiss to the raven-haired man's forehead, giving a short laugh at the focused frown on Ryuzaki's face.

"Easy…" He mumbled, smiling, lifting his hands to place over the other's, helping Ryuzaki while watching with slight amusement as a small blush of embarrassment found it's way to the detective's face. Black eyes met his and something flicked beneath the surface, after which the other man's hands promptly dropped to his sides.

Arching a brow, Raito started slightly at the soft tremor that ran through L's frame, and he cupped the detective's face slowly. But before he could voice his concern, the other male swallowed. "…Raito-kun… I…" L bit his lip, not finishing his sentence, instead averted his eyes and tried again. "…I-…"

Raito fought back a small smile at the helpless look. "Hush." He leaned in and nipped the other's neck, smile widening at the soft whimper. "It's alright." Whatever Ryuzaki had been trying to say, it didn't matter much in the present time, he figured. Nothing that was worth putting too much thought in, at least. Nothing was worth putting too much thought in right now, he then thought, frowning to himself.

Slightly more timid now, wondering if the detective was perhaps being anxious about the closeness, he invaded L's personal space again, pushing his hips gently against the older man's and heard him choke on his breath. Raito tried not to wince as Ryuzaki gripped his shoulders none too gently, nails digging sharply into his skin even through the material of his shirt. He realized the other was still shaking, and his arms were straining as if he was split between wanting to push Raito away and pull him closer.

Attempting to help L with his decision, Raito ground against the other with a little more determination, watching as black eyes widened while a gasp tore from the other's throat, resulting in the fingers digging more forcefully into his shoulders, but the detective's feeble attempts to push him away had ceased. "R-Raito-kun…"

He hushed him again, nipping at the juncture between neck and shoulder, adding slight pressure to the already existing mark, feeling the slim frame shudder and hearing another faint whimper pass between L's lips, now with a slightly stressed undertone.

"…Raito-kun… I… We…" Panting softly, L writhed slightly, eyes having shut somewhere along the line. Raito ignored the soft proclamations, travelling to the detective's collarbone, nipping it tenderly. "I…"

"You what?" He finally asked, but didn't wait for an answer, moving up to Ryuzaki's neck again, while he brushed his left hand over L's collarbone, index finger gently tracing the design of the mark that he still knew so little about.

Black eyes snapped open, a panic-struck look on the other's face, and Raito barely had a chance to arch a brow quizzically, before he felt a harsh push at his shoulders as the detective forcefully shoved him away.

He only had the time to brace himself slightly as he felt himself over-balancing backwards – briefly thinking that this couldn't possibly end well – before he tumbled to the floor, the back of his skull connecting unsympathetically with the solid surface of the wall.

His vision momentarily blackened; a dull nauseating feeling first present in his mind before the pain resurfaced after the moment of shock. Groaning painfully, he shifted only to feel his head spin at the movement, and instead lifted one hand to the back of his head, wondering unhappily if he had cracked it. He didn't even mention the other's presence next to him as he set on trying to will the aching pain away, still keeping his eyes shut.

"…I'm sorry, are you alright?" He almost laughed. Almost – because doing so would probably make him either faint or throw up. That had to be the most ridiculous question ever.

"…Not really…" he ground out between gritted teeth, sucking in a breath as he gingerly tried sitting up again, not daring to reopen his eyes as he feared the room would spin too much. "…Hitting your head on a solid surface isn't what I would call 'alright', Ryuzaki." He then grumbled, bitterly.

"…I'm very sorry…" The detective murmured softly, before assisting him in sitting up. Still feeling nauseous, Raito leaned his head against L's shoulder, inhaling deeply and still refusing to open his eyes. "You might have brought a minor concussion upon yourself."

Brought a minor concussion **upon himself**? Not **that** was funny! He snorted. "Last I checked, you caused it."

He heard the other click his tongue in thought. "In the long lead, you still brought it upon yourself." Cautiously helping him to stand up, L continued, "Raito-kun probably needs to lie down. I'll see if I can get some ice."

Blinking amber eyes open slowly, Raito squinted at the light, gritting his teeth as the room still spun ominously before his vision. "You're probably right…"

With some help from L, he sat down on the sofa, at first merely leaning back, placing one hand over his eyes with a sigh, mentally forcing the nausea away. When that was unsuccessful, he dropped his hand to his side, continuing by staring up at the ceiling.

He hadn't heard L leave, but when the detective returned a few minutes later, closing the door behind him, Raito turned his head slowly to regard him. "I managed to get a hold of some ice." The raven-haired man explained, showing up the towel-wrapped package he was holding.

"Good, because my head feels like it's split in half." Raito grumbled, closing his eyes again. The soft padding of the detective's bare feet against the floor was the only sound for a few seconds before a weight to his right told him that Ryuzaki had sat down next to him.

"Then Raito-kun should lie down." Glancing in the detective's direction, he was startled to see that instead of having enacted his usual sitting position, Ryuzaki had instead, with both feet still on the floor, sat down like any other human being would have done. Confused at the, for the detective, odd behaviour, he arched a brow. "…I just thought that the least I could do for causing Raito-kun such pain is to assist in helping him recover."

Raito snorted softly, but lied down nevertheless, head resting on the detective's lap. "Either you're being genuinely considerate or you're just trying to cover up the fact that you almost cracked my skull."

"It was not my intention, and I've already apologized twice." L bit his bottom lip in something akin to anxiety. "If Raito-kun finds that he'll be fine on his own, that is -…" Raito raised one hand to silence the other.

"I understand. I'm sorry for sounding harsh…" He apologized, putting one hand to his forehead. The slow pounding pain was driving him insane, and it didn't help matters that his vision was still edged with black. He started slightly when the cold, towel-wrapped package was placed against the left side of his head, slightly towards the back. But as soon as the coldness of the ice started soothing his abused skull, he sighed almost contently.

"Apology accepted…" L answered calmly, shifting the ice a slight bit before falling into an almost uncomfortable silence, where Raito kept staring at the blank surface of the TV across of the table, watching the detective as Ryuzaki was absently looking towards his right.

"…Ryuzaki?" Black eyes blinked once before looking down at him, he didn't meet them, however, and instead kept looking at the surface of the screen. "…That mark of yours – what does it really stand for? You said it was a contract, and you had to sacrifice something for the tenshi powers…" The detective's gaze shifted away again, he noticed, and glanced up to meet unreadable black. "So what is it you've had to sacrifice?"

"…" L didn't answer, gaze firmly avoiding his. "…It's a highly personal matter, Raito-kun. What the contract means and what I have sacrificed is none of your concern." There was only the slightest hint of an edgy tone in his voice, but Raito noticed it even so.

"I see… touchy subject." He frowned. But even if it **was** a touchy subject, L had never been truly secretive about anything he had asked before. Hidden some information, yes, but never outright told him that it was none of his business. "So… I've been wondering for a while… I'd actually want to ask Jyiva this, but… Does the Shinigami-Tenshi war have something to do with the origin of the Christian religion?"

Another terse silence followed before L hummed softly. "Seems like Raito-kun hasn't lost his touch." The detective brushed some stray strands of hair out of the brunet's face before continuing. "That is true."

"So then… the human tenshi at that time…"

"… Is the one that the Christian believers daily claim to be the son of god, yes." The ice was removed and placed on the table, the raven-haired male then leaning back, eyes closing with a soft exhale of breath. "Before that time, the world was in great disorder, with the Roman empire trying to put the world at their feet. So the tenshi, still active in trying to straighten the world tog-… straighten the world up to a more balanced one, decided to choose a human being and pass on a fake legacy."

"So it is all a fraud? About the angel visiting Maria and the whole part of Jesus being god's son?" He arched a brow, turning slightly to be able to look up at the other.

"Not completely… the angel Gabriel did visit Maria, and he is the 'archangel' of heaven – the lead seraphim. And Maria's son did become heaven's child. The part stated that she was a virgin is also true. Much like this body of mine, the child was created – as it is impossible for an unborn to become a human tenshi in another way."

"…So basically, the tenshi created the Christian religion?"

"Yes." Ryuzaki nodded. "However, not everything went as planned. The shinigami turned against them and started to drive people against the human tenshi, while the tenshi resurrected those fallen in their forces. I guess that Ryuk has voiced his wonder why the tenshi revived the fallen instead of the human tenshi?"

"He has…"

"It is also because of the risk of reviving…" L paused momentarily. "…Since a human tenshi has to pass the border between life and death in order to revive a human being. If one's mind is not stronger than the human's, one won't be able to return back."

"…So if you pass over… you mean you enter purgatory?"

"Purgatory is the darkness in which all souls reside before passing on. It is everyone's personal experience, and it feels different for all. Some have a blank darkness; some have sorrow, hate or joy. And since it's personal, no one is allowed inside. If one intrudes, those emotions and the soul turn against you. The tenshi have the protection of their wings, but a human tenshi does not. Our souls, and our minds, are completely unprotected."

"So… to be a human tenshi, you need a strong mind."

"Yes." Another nod. Raito felt his head hurting again, and just as the detective was to speak up again, he raised his hand.

"Okay, enough for now… I can't take too much information at the moment. So the point is, the roman side was controlled by the shinigami and the ones following Jesus were guided by the tenshi?"

"In rough words, yes."

"So the shinigami won?"

"Not entirely. As said, Jesus was revived on the third day. The tenshi agreed on a truce with the shinigami, and the tenshi promised to not meddle with the affairs of the human world again as long as they were allowed to finish their legacy."

"I see…" He hummed. "So in the end, the tenshi left the human world and everything settled again?"

"There have been times that the tenshi wanted to meddle, but breaking the agreement didn't seem wise."

Raito shifted, meeting Ryuzaki's eyes again. "So why now?"

"This is a personal agreement between me and Jyiva. If heaven finds out about it, Jyiva will have his wings clipped and I will be killed." Black eyes closed. "Though it's a risk I'm willing to take. We have to prove to the High council that this is not the shinigami's doing, and if it is, it will have ceased."

A frown settling on his face, Raito huffed. "Then why don't you just kill me? It would've been the easiest way."

"…" L looked at him again, a sudden solemn look on his face. "If Raito-kun dies, all my efforts have been wasted and my life would end."

"What do you mean with that?"

"I'd just be a shadow without a name. Unable to reveal my identity to anyone. Raito-kun is my only reason for being here, after all."

The quipped tone of the other's voice was strangely enough making him frown, as if the detective had said something extremely sad. He didn't know why, but somehow he felt bad. Not only had he killed the man, but also made him return to a world were he could not live.

Without thinking about it, he shifted to his back, reaching up and placing his hand on the back of the other's neck. Not mentioning Ryuzaki's inquiring hum, he pulled the raven hared male's head down, his lips at first merely brushing against the still ones above him, but after a soft nip at L's bottom lip, he was allowed to slide his tongue in, only tenderly brushing against the other's.

There was nothing hurried about the kiss, just the soft touch of lips, the gentle caress of tongues, and the soft noises of subtle pleasure. After barely half a minute they parted, and Raito reopened brown eyes to meet their darker counterparts, slightly hazed as Ryuzaki looked at him with a slightly startled expression. "…Raito-kun?"

"…" He didn't answer, instead just smiled, waiting until the detective's facial expression softened into a small smile too.

"L." They both looked up, Raito noticing a slight icy look in Jyiva's normally blank eyes. There suddenly was an almost awkward shifting as Ryuzaki cleared his throat.

"…Is Raito-kun feeling well enough to sit up now?"

"…Ah… uhm, yeah." He nodded and sat up, perplexed as the raven-haired man rose, brushing some hair out of his face.

"…I'm going to see if they have opened the cafeteria…" He murmured before heading for the door, pausing for a moment to look up at the tenshi. Raito could swear something happened in that single look, for L abruptly turned his head and left the room.

"What the-…" He managed to utter, blinking once. Jyiva turned towards him instead, silver eyes now having softened, instead showing something that resembled concern.

"…" The tenshi blinked once before watching him with now unemotional eyes. "I heard that you had some questions a while ago, and I am sorry to have not been able to talk to you until now."

"N-No worries about that…" Raito shook his head, recollecting himself again. "Ryuzaki answered one of my major questions… but I have still some smaller I haven't gotten an answer to yet."

"I will only answer in the way I see fit – I hope you understand that." The tenshi gave him an earnest look. "After all, we are trying to straighten your mind out, and nothing else."

"To me, it sounds rather dumb to say that you want to change a person to the person's face." His only reply was a narrowed gaze, and he decided to shut up. "…Well… Anyway." Something about this entire situation was… awkward? Perhaps. "All that is stuck on my mind is that mark of his… he won't tell me about it."

"He has is reasons for that, too." Jyiva mentioned, looking past him at the window. "He told you it's his sign of contract."

"He did…" Raito nodded. "I couldn't read it though…"

"Of course you cannot. It's in our language." A small smile fled over the seraphim's face. "However, you have a clue to help you decipher it in your briefcase." Raito blinked. In his briefcase? The only thing he had in his briefcase was Misa's former death note-

He halted his thoughts, blinking again as he rose to his feet, quickly striding over to where he had placed his briefcase, at the door, and picked out the black notebook. He glanced at the cover. He knew what it said, even though the language was different. 'Death Note'.

He blinked again. Brief flashes of the mark adorning the other's skin passed him as he traced the foreign yet known symbols on the black cover. He recognized the 't', the 'a', that appeared twice, and the 'o'… but the other six…

He frowned, but reached one conclusion immediately. "The tenshi and the shinigami have the same language!"

"We do." Jyiva nodded. "After all…"

"…-tenshi and shinigami were once the same race." Ryuzaki answered, having returned almost unnoticed, giving Raito a rather blank look while closing the door. "The war two-thousand years ago was actually because of a conflict between the shinigami and the tenshi, when their opinions differed. They used to be the same race, but their looks were different depending on their source of power."

"To give live, or to take it, right?" Raito asked, returning the Death Note to its original place.

"Right." Jyiva replied.

"Raito-kun should consider taking a shower if he wants to do so before heading for work." Ryuzaki mentioned, plainly. "It's already twenty minutes past six."

"…You're right…" The brunet agreed, nodding. "Are there towels I can borrow?"

"Raito-kun may use whatever he wishes however he wishes." The detective replied. "I need to get some saccharine into my system." And with that conclusion, he passed Raito and headed for the sofa, placing the bag he was carrying on the table in the process.

Raito cast him a wary look, still wondering about his sudden change of demeanour, but shrugged it off momentarily as he headed for the bathroom.

** DeathNote **

When he returned to the living room a quarter of an hour later, L was busy eating a piece of chocolate cake, speaking with Jyiva. The conversation died out when he entered the room, however, and he arched a brow. "Secrets?"

"Does Raito-kun care for some breakfast?" Ryuzaki asked, tilting his head as he smoothly switched subject. Raito glanced at the different sweets on the table and was about to open his mouth to retort when the detective lifted up a second bag. "Black coffee – no milk or sugar. Two bagels, one with ham, lettuce and tomato, and the other with cheese and cucumber. There is also an apple. Does that suit your fancies?"

Raito shut his mouth before starting anew. "Sounds okay." He managed, while glancing at the time. "But I should be leaving. Matsuda wanted a meeting at half past seven, so…"

"I understand." L nodded, rising up and bringing the bag with him. "I suspected Raito-kun had to leave soon."

After he had pulled his shoes and jacket on again, he accepted the bag from the other, attempting to brush his hand in the process as an apology for whatever he had done, but L pulled his hand back as if he'd been burned, and Raito gave him a confused look.

Upon seeing this, Jyiva spoke up. "If you figure it out, Yagami Raito, I might speak with you of details." L glanced at the tenshi questioningly, and Raito blinked, before realizing what he was getting at, and nodded.

"…Well… I'll see you around." He said, and Ryuzaki nodded.

"I guess so."

Frowning still, Raito faced the door and left. And as the door fell shut behind him, he felt sick again, but this time it was of a worrying kind. Something he'd done had upset the detective, and he didn't know what. He glanced down at his hand before stopping by the elevator, waiting for it.

Once inside, he picked up a blank piece of paper and wrote down the design of the mark upon it, marking out the letters he knew.

Unknown – a – unknown – a – unknown – unknown – unknown – a – unknown – t – o.

He still missed six. He also marked the two which were alike. The sixth and the ninth symbol.

"Maybe I should ask Ryuk about it…" He mused, but voted against it. The shinigami would probably only laugh at him. And he wasn't in the mood to be laughed at. Instead he put the paper back inside his briefcase and picked out the death note.

Remembering the two girls' scared faces, he frowned. He shouldn't… the news report was fake, wrong… but he had to, or people would question him. And L would revive them…

L would.

Even if the detective's mind would have to battle the girls' terrified souls… But he was still Kira, and he had to clean this world.

Sacrifices were needed, right? After all, L had been.

L had…

His hand clenched the pen painfully, while he set it to the blank page. _Shiroku Shana_. One. One girl with only forty seconds left of her life, before it would be gone.

His being trembled, as he remembered the second girl, looking so much like his own sister did a couple of years ago. His handwriting was unusually quivered when he finished the last kana. _Shiroku Yuna._ He breathed out and returned the death note, still shaking. He glanced at his watch as the elevator continued to descend. Thirty-nine… forty. And then five more seconds. Two. Two. Two young souls gone - dead because of the obsessive lies of the media.

No…

They were gone because of him.

He felt very sick, and even as the elevator stopped on the entrance floor, he didn't step out, fearing he would vomit if he moved from the spot. He clenched his eyes shut and bit his lip.

"I'm sorry…"

But to whom he apologized, he did not know.

**WOAH! Finally done with that. So we got more kissing (Insert random cheers here) but some angstyness too. Gotta fill my quota of that. And I think Raito is stupid, since I think people can guess the symbols by now cough but if you can't that's fine (helps the story being more cliffhangy). And if you know the symbols – don't spell it out in a review – don't spoil for those who don't know .**

**So, the tenshi and the shinigami were the same race once. What do you say about that, hm?**

**Any points on this chapter… not really… But Raito seems to be understanding that he's wrong – FINALLY. He's such an idiot shakes head**

**So, with that said… **

**Until next time!**

**/Keyhala**


	14. Chapter 14

**Warning:** **Both disclaimer and story include spoilers up to and including volume 7! After that, not even I know what happens, but if you haven't read volume 7, and don't want to know major spoilers – do NOT read. If you don't mind spoilers or have already read, then please go ahead **

**FIRST OF ALL! AN apology to ALL my readers! I'm So VERYVERYVERYVERYVERYVERYVERY sorry that I haven't updated earlier! I'm ashamed of myself! I shouldn't try and use excuses, but I'll explain what has kept me.**

**First of all, during the time chapter 13 was posted, I had TONS of assignments, projects and essays for school. I had 8 NEW ones after that, for the last week of the term. Terribly annoying. After that, my entire family (including me) went on Vacation to the US for three weeks. No writing there either. When I returned, I had to start making preparations.**

**For what, you wonder?**

**Well, for the reason I am currently in Japan. After receiving a scholarship for 4 months of study here, I had a lot to fix with my Visa, applications and stuff like that. And then I got to Japan, in mid-August, and had to get myself settled and shit. Then, three days ago (September 25th), I decided that NOW it really was the time to finish this bloody chapter.**

**And I did. So I'm rather proud of myself. At any rate!**

**In this chapter some more stuff is revealed, both to Raito and to people around him (hmmmm…?)**

**Read to find out! Thank you for (even more) of your time, but on to the story, right?**

**Disclaimer:** **I do not own Death Note or any of its Characters. If I did, L would never have died and There would've been a lot more yaoi laugh**

**Summary:** **In the year 2010, Kira's will has almost become the law. Raito has no more competition as the chief inspector of the NPA. Even if the role of 'L' was relinquished a year earlier, at the same time as Near and Mello got wiped from history, he has no problem, since he holds the entire police force of Japan, as well as well as the role of the worlds 'saviour', Kira. There are slight complications with the now upcoming discussions about disbanding the police, but he doesn't see it as a long-term problem.**

**Everything seems to be going fine, up until Friday the thirteenth of August, when something pretty unpredictable happens. One of the newly dead criminals, who got killed by Kira's judgement, suddenly reawakens on the hospital, three hours after her death. Shocked at this information, Raito decides to get information from the woman. But she has no memories of her life whatsoever, only her name, age and a cryptic phrase; "_Once is once – but everyone gains a second chance." _**

**Deciding to go home to think the entire situation over, he finds another shocking surprise waiting. For if a woman who has been dead can reawaken… then why couldn't also someone else?**

**Warnings:** **Yaoi (malexmale), Violence, Language**

**Well, with that in mind, why don't we get started? And my dears, please don't forget to review It would make a poor authoresses' day if you could take the time to write a decent review! Tell me what you think **

Chapter 14

"…No, that can't be it…" Brown eyes, almost looking amber in the light from the rising sun, narrowed as their owner stared at the piece of paper in his hands. Seeing that the light switched to green, he folded the already heavily worn piece of paper and pushed it into the pocket of his jacket as he crossed the street.

"Sure you don't want my help?" The shinigami behind him asked amusedly, chuckling at his annoyance.

"No. I have full faith for my own ability to solve it. Besides," he glared at the otherworldly being with cold eyes, "I'm still mad at you for forgetting to mention that the shinigami and tenshi were originally the same race."

"But Raito, that was eras ago, you can't honestly believe that I remember such a thing?"

"So it has nothing to do with your obvious discomfort at seeing a tenshi in the human realm?" He asked, in an unfazed tone. A cold wind swept past him and he shivered despite the jacket. He had always hated autumn, and now that they were into October, he felt a lingering annoyance that never truly left his being.

"…" The shinigami didn't answer his question – not that it surprised him – but was instead watching the people around them. And obviously, after that there had to be a switch of topic. "So, two weeks and not a word?"

"It somehow seems that's how it ends up after each meeting." Raito said, soberly. "However, this time he doesn't even answer any email I send."

"Try visiting again?"

"I did, last week, remember? The receptionist said he'd checked out. I have no way of getting to know where he is now." He snorted angrily, at which the shinigami laughed. He didn't understand Ryuk's amusement. Not only was he getting nowhere with figuring out the mark, but he wasn't getting anywhere else either. After the incident with the Shiroku twins, he had sent out a warning to all TV-channels. After another fake report, he'd killed both the apparent culprit – even if the man hadn't killed anyone, he'd still robbed a bank – and the director of the TV-channel.

So naturally, the media had turned more cautious. But the usual reports came in, and he killed them – as usual. Ten the past two weeks.

It wasn't that the crime rate increased – his boredom just did. Or maybe his annoyance – he couldn't really tell them from one another anymore. Or maybe he just did it to try and justify his killing of those two girls…

"You're acting like you're deprived, Raito. You should watch out."

"And this comes from the god of death who is addicted to apples?" The brunet questioned simply. The Shiroku twins haunted him – and he needed them off his mind. In some way or another. So if killing more people helped, then he killed more people. But he was still feeling annoyed. As he hadn't gotten any time to speak to the detective, he still had the unanswered question in the back of his head.

Why had he flinched away?

He knew it was rather childish to get hung up on it, but he couldn't help but wonder what had happened in the exchange of looks that happened between L and Jyiva, which had somehow resulted in Ryuzaki flinching away at a simple touch of Raito's hand. Raito never got to know why, so he didn't understand it.

And Yagami Raito hated things he couldn't understand.

Like the mark. He crumpled the folded paper tightly in his hand, still pushed deep into his pocket. Why couldn't he figure it out? It seemed as if he was overlooking something. But what?

The entire thing was ridiculous. Yagami Raito **never** overlooked anything. At least, that was what he kept telling himself. But lately it had just… begun to run away from him – it was like he was trailing behind and didn't hold his steady grip on the situation. And that was unnerving. Aggravating, even. The last time he had lost control of himself, he was four years old and was learning how to ride his bicycle. It had ended with a lot of bruises and he himself had stubbornly avoided the vehicle for a year.

His problem at the moment was that he couldn't avoid the problem at hand. He had to do something against it. But it was unfamiliar. Had L been a girl he came across, he could just have used his own looks and charm to convince the person that his way was the truth, and the only truth. But L wasn't a girl, and certainly not easily manipulated. If he had been, Raito wouldn't have been in this dilemma now.

He sighed.

"Six times." He blinked up at the shinigami.

"Say what?"

"That's the sixth time you've sighed in a minute. You're really acting like you're suffering from a withdrawal."

"I am not." He snorted. "I am just trying to find a solution for this irritating obstacle."

"If that's how you wish to put it…" Ryuk shrugged. "Even so, what are you being out here at this hour? You're not supposed to be at the office until three hours from now."

"…I didn't really feel like just being at home without anything to do." He said, even though he just made it up in his head that very minute. He had actually gone out to think, but it was hard with that Shinigami looming over him. He had to solve this in some way. "Hey, Ryuk."

"Mhm?"

"How about I take the bus out to the apple plantation? You leave me alone to think and in return you can fetch as many apples as you want." The shinigami gave him a distrustful look at first, but as he just regarded the look with a calm one of his own, the otherworldly being quickly complied, nodding.

"Sounds like a plan."

**DeathNote **

"One person." Raito said, calmly, and paid for his ticket. He had never truly understood the concept of these 'tourist spots'. Because, it was only an apple plantation, right? And now people could pay for a ticket, walk around and eat apples. How weird wasn't that?

The shinigami quickly disappeared, as predicted, and Raito sat down beneath one of the trees, out of hearing range from the small cafeteria, but still close enough to hear if something out of the ordinary happened. Closing his eyes, he leaned back to think. He had to part this dilemma into the small problems and solve them one after another.

He had L. That was the main issue. L was the entire reason why his reign couldn't continue as before. And the main problem was his tenshi powers.

He also had the mark – which plays an important part in getting rid of the obstacle, which was L's tenshi powers. So he had to figure out the mark, and lurk out what it meant, and force L to break the contract.

Thirdly, he had Jyiva. And Jyiva was probably the oddest part of this. He had brought L back to life, gave him the powers of the tenshi in order for L to stop Raito. However, he also provided Raito with small hints to help him destroy the contract that allowed L to try and stop Raito.

He frowned. Jyiva certainly was confusing… Either way.

Fourthly, he had…

Well… himself. And the way he was acting. Sighing softly, he shook his head to himself, glancing up at the branches of the tree. If L was the main issue, then he was the largest problem. Before anything else would go his way, he had to stop these ridiculous things from happening.

Like the kissing… or the way he always seemed to lose his head when the other's eyes gave him that softer, almost open look…

He suddenly halted his thoughts, and shook his head, forcefully. That wasn't what he was supposed to think about. That was certainly **not** where his mind needed to go. He needed to focus. Maybe his blood sugar was low?

He considered getting something sweet just to raise his energy level – this low concentration had to be because of his blood sugar – but found that he probably wouldn't like it. After all, he didn't enjoy sweet things…

…Unless of course…

He slapped himself this time, rising up quickly. Coffee. Caffeine would surely help. And a visit to a psychiatrist, because he was going insane – he was sure of it. This couldn't be healthy.

Striding towards the cafeteria with a small scowl on his face, he didn't even apologize when he bumped into a person on his way. He instead kept his gaze on the menu board, wincing at the price but then shrugging and picking up his wallet while waiting for the family in front of him to finish their order.

"…I never thought I'd see Raito-kun in a place like this…" The soft voice stopped him dead in his tracks, and he feared his neck would snap when he quickly turned his head to his right.

L wasn't watching him, instead had his eyes focused on the same menu board that Raito had previously, thumb resting against his lips while his left hand rubbed at his right shoulder. His entire composure seemed… tired, even for being him. Raito noted that the bags under his eyes had deepened slightly, and his eyes weren't as sharp as he remembered them.

"Also, Raito-kun should be more careful when he walks, he almost knocked me to the ground."

He didn't answer, just kept gaping at the raven-haired man, but remembered the person he'd run into. He had been too stern to even notice... After a short while, he managed to wring out a, "what are you doing here?"

"I found out from Yamamoto-san that this place had wonderful apple pie, so I thought I could give it a try." Black eyes cast him one look. "What about Raito-kun?"

"…I wanted Ryuk to leave me alone, so I made a deal with him, so he gets to be here and eat apples." He noticed the family had finished, and went up to the cashier and ordered his coffee, before continuing, "That's the only way to get some time to think."

"I see." Raito received his coffee, and L casually ordered a piece of the damned apple pie, while now rubbing at his neck tiredly. I see? Somehow that was something he didn't expect to hear. Knowing L, the detective would most likely have asked further questions, of the nature of why Raito needed to think, or in which ways Ryuk was a nuisance.

But none of that came.

That was… certainly… a perplexing turn of events. He had actually, in that short amount of time, collected up possible excuses. And now he wouldn't have to use them? What was…?

"I think it's better to sit outside, there is too much noise in here." L commented wistfully, eyeing him as he received the piece of cake.

"…Yes… of course." He said, slowly, and followed the detective out in the newly arrived sunlight. The detective continued by looking around for a place to sit, at which he spoke up. "I had a nice place under a tree a while away."

"…Very well." Still frowning, Raito returned to the tree he had been at, and sat down, lifting the mug to his lips and taking a short sip, before concluding it was still scorching, so he simply held it. He watched the detective out of the corner of his eye as L sat down as well, knees as usually drawn up to his chest, taking an absent bite from the pie, eyes still vacant.

Brown eyes narrowing, Raito took another slow sip, concluding that, yes, something was wrong with the detective. And out of curiosity – and perhaps more – he wanted to know what. But first things first. He needed to know why the other had simply disappeared without a word for two weeks.

"Eru…" He started, pronouncing the other's name slowly, the fact that he was speaking Japanese turning the single letter into a longer sound than the English one should have been.

"It's not your fault." The answer was spoken out softly before he could even ask the question. "I just needed some time for myself. I had some things to sort out."

'Like what?' he wanted to ask, but held the question back. Instead he softly inclined his head in understanding, taking a quiet sip of his coffee. But he couldn't help but continue to watch the other with something akin to worry. Ryuzaki was looking… tired. Even if the bags under his eyes usually showed that he didn't sleep much, and his nature and posture seemed lazy… this was different. There was no determination, something he always saw, in the dark depths of the detective's eyes. Now they were, even more than usually, void of emotion.

And that was… somewhat… frightening. Void of emotion… void of life. He knew the look. He had seen it before. In those very same eyes. But that was a long time ago – he should have forgotten it by now.

But he hadn't. He remembered the open shock, followed by the slow simmering of realization, the hurt of betrayal… even the calm of understanding and then… it all vanished. All life had left those deep black eyes.

It had been a cruel feeling. First, he had gotten to see those eyes filled with emotions, a rare sight indeed… only to watch them all die away. He had wished to see both somewhere during the way, but he had never wanted to see them directly after another.

He had always associated L's death with some sort of victory. Nowadays… the thought of those eyes, void of everything that could show proof of a soul… scared him.

"Is Raito-kun troubled about something?" He blinked and looked up at the other. "He has been looking down into his cup of coffee for some time now."

"…You're one to talk." He retorted, huffing out a soft snort and taking a sip of coffee. "You look completely dead – what happened to you?"

"…" L did not answer at first, merely meeting his gaze soberly. Then, "I wish I could say again that it is not Raito-kun's fault, but then I'd be lying."

"…Excuse me?" He blinked once, the cup almost slipping out of his hand. He quickly regained his grip on the cup before he could make a mess out of his clothes. He firmly gave the other a glare that went unnoticed as Ryuzaki took another bite of his pie.

"Raito-kun is merely being very inconsiderate about my health as he's asking me why I look drained when he should have an idea about why." Black eyes turned to him, and he shivered at the empty void present there. "Especially with the amount of victims he's passed judgement upon within the last two weeks. Either the criminals have heavily increased or Raito-kun is killing without much thought."

"…" He was speechless. What did the other try to say, that because he killed more, he was exhausting the detective? That had to be the most ridiculous… if not…

"You mean that reviving people is that hard for you?"

"Each time, I have to pass into the borderline between life and death. Meaning I have to leave my body in a near-dead state for the time it takes to reawaken the victim." The words were in no way rushed, but they came out monotonously. Almost… almost coldly. "And I can guess that Raito-kun can understand that when waking up from a near-dead state, one's stamina is harshly reduced."

"…I did not know." He murmured, but knew that such an excuse would not be something that would make it undone. Nothing could make his actions undone. Hence why he continued with them. There was simply no way back anyway…

"Of course you didn't." L finished the pie and set the plate down on the grass next to him, hands coming to rest on his knees. "Raito-kun is strangely unknowing about anything outside his own little imaginary _perfect_ world." He almost hissed the word out, as if it was something vile.

"Just drop it, okay?" Raito set down the now empty cup and moved some hair out of his eyes with an annoyed sigh. "We've passed this already. You don't agree with my opinions, and I don't agree with yours. We're stuck in stalemate on our little battle and we keep looping our conversations. Somehow we cannot agree on anything and you have a hard time deciding if you… really want to speak with me or not. You constantly disappear without any trace!" He had almost said something else along the way there, but he had quickly avoided what could have been a fatal slip of tongue. And it would have been **very** fatal, as he wouldn't have had any idea as to why he would have said it.

L sighed softly, looking away again. "Raito-kun is aggravated."

"Damn straight I am." He snorted again. "This entire thing is getting me more frustrated than some incidents did four years ago."

"Am I correct to assume that he's angry since I didn't speak to him in two weeks?"

"…" He just huffed once, but knew the other would understand that as an affirmative answer.

"I am sorry to have caused you such anxiety." Raito was just about to retort with something stingy when the raven-haired man suddenly put his right hand to the ground, eyes widened slightly. As Raito arched a brow at him, he coughed softly. "I lost my balance…"

Lost his balance? He didn't remember that the detective had lost his balance a single time in the past. "Maybe you shouldn't be sitting like that if you're tired, then." Black eyes gave him an earnest look before L sat back the exact same way as before. "It was just a piece of friendly advice, Ryuzaki."

"Of course it was."

"…" This was… awkward. Maybe he should just switch topic? He opened his mouth, but realized he couldn't come up with anything to say, so he shut it again, just clearing his throat softly. L gave him a short look but then only turned his head away again with a soft snort. Raito's gaze narrowed into a glare. "Now what the hell was that for? You're the one being stubborn and not accepting a simple piece of advice."

"People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones, Raito-kun." Raito gave him a baffled look before the detective continued. "My stubbornness in this issue is hardly anything in comparison to **certain** other ones."

He wanted to throw out some angry retort to that one, hesitated a moment, and then sneered, "you sure like to get us looped into the same conversation, don't you?" He leaned back against the trunk of the tree and folded his arms behind his head. "Haven't we already cleared out that it won't lead anywhere?"

"We have. However…" L sighed softly, setting one hand to the ground again, "I will continue to bring the issue up until my point drives through your peculiarly thick skull."

Raito arched a brow at the other, but L didn't meet his gaze as he instead kept watching up through the leaves of the tree. _Peculiarly thick skull_? What the… "You won't succeed. Why can't you just accept my views?"

"Because that would be like signing Raito-kun's death sentence." L said, simply. "And then all my efforts would be in vain. Also, I do not wish to follow a selfish belief such as yours."

"…!" He held in something nasty, simply because he knew it would only throw them into another argument. And he wasn't really in the mood for it. After all, he'd come here to think for a while before heading to the meeting with Matsuda… He glanced at his watch. Still one and a half hour left. And why were they going so awkwardly silent all the time?

Maybe they were just approaching their conversations in the wrong way. Perhaps he was focusing too much on the situation at hand, and that was what caused these arguments. Well, that was quite obvious, as they did have different views on the case. And if the **only** spoke of it… there was bound to be an argument. So maybe if he tried to approach another subject entirely and then subtly move towards the conflict? "…So what cake did you have for breakfast?"

L twisted his head in Raito's direction, and his face held a look of utter surprise, which made a smile tug at Raito's lips, even if he didn't let it show. Apparently, the question hadn't been expected. However, the detective didn't seem to be shocked for long, instead his facial expression calmed as he answered, "actually, Raito-kun, I did not have cake this morning. I-…"

"Are you trying to tell me that you had **real **food?" Raito smirked now, knowing that it would be impossible.

The slightest pout crossed Ryuzaki's lips. "I was actually going to say that I had Ice-cream."

"You just crushed my hopes of you eating correctly." Raito said, with a tone of faked hurt.

"I can't even comprehend why Raito-kun has gotten his 'hopes up' when he during the entire time we were chained together must have realized that my diet consist solely of sweets."

"Hope is the last that leaves a human being." He answered simply.

"Indeed it is-" L trailed off, eyes turning upwards again, and Raito groaned inwardly. Had he killed the conversation now? He used to be good at dialogues. And yet, now… he seemed… untactful.

Pondering over this for a while, he folded his arms behind his neck and leaned back against the trunk of the tree, eyes closing. Maybe if he just ignored L, the detective would eventually leave. That way, he could focus on thinking and actually get something thought out. However, there was something that unsettled him, and he cracked one eye open to find the other openly staring at him with that wide gaze of his. "What is it?"

"Raito-kun looks very handsome like that."

He arched a brow. "How do you mean?"

"He looks completely relaxed, almost as if asleep, and the sun through the leaves has quite the interesting effect on the lighting." The detective lifted his hands, thumbs and index fingers creating a frame. "If I was artistically gifted, I would have drawn an image of this scenery."

Snorting softly, adding a slightly amused smirk, Raito closed his eyes again. "You just keep saying the most ridiculous things at times, Ryuzaki."

"I was being serious." L retorted, sounding slightly hurt. "It's really a shame that I never took art courses. I sincerely regret it at this moment."

"Perhaps that is why people normally have cameras for such things."

"Cameras in all honour, but I don't think a photograph would gain the same effect as a drawn picture." Raito resisted a laugh and instead shrugged faintly.

"You could always take a picture and then ask someone to draw it afterwards."

"Raito-kun never fails to impress me with his thoughts at times." He heard the other rise up and cracked one eye open again, feeling slightly confused. "I'll see if someone could be so kind and borrow me a camera."

"You're out of your mind." Raito concluded, staring at the other with both eyes open now.

"You may say so, Raito-kun, but I really want that picture." Raito narrowed his eyes but the look on the other's face showed nothing but sincerity. Sighing deeply, he closed his eyes again.

"Fine. I have a digital one in my briefcase. You may borrow it – if it's so important."

"That is very kind of you." Raito glanced up just in time to see a small smile on the other's face. "But Raito-kun should really stop looking so annoyed now, it destroys the mood."

Snorting shortly, Raito rolled his eyes before complying with Ryuzaki's request, still finding the entire situation abnormally stupid. But he figured it was better to just let the other do what he wished, it would at least give him some more time to think.

There was still the issue of his own behaviour, he concluded, slowly. He really needed to figure himself out. That and the mark. Those were the highest priority right now. Once getting past those points, he knew it would get easier.

He had already heard the first click, but was a bit annoyed now that he had counted up to seven. "Ryuzaki."

"Yes?"

"What exactly are you doing?" He cracked one eye open again, glancing at the detective.

"I'm taking pictures from several different angles. That way I have more to choose from later on." L tilted his head slightly, maybe in thought. "Does it aggravate Raito-kun?"

"…Well… no, not really." He hesitated slightly, because he found that he really didn't mind. He didn't mind the other's presence, or the fact that he was shooting photographs of him. It was quite the contrary, and the detective's company was… surprisingly welcome. "Are you done?"

"…Yes… thank you for allowing me to borrow the camera." L flicked the hand holding the camera slightly before returning the item to the briefcase.

"You're very welcome." Raito replied, eyeing the pale man out of the corner of his eyes as L returned to the spot next to him, glancing up at the leaves.

"When does Raito-kun need to leave for the meeting with Matsuda-san?" Raito glanced at his watch.

"In an hour." The detective hummed in affirmation and then, surprisingly, sat down on the ground, even if his knees where still brought up to his chest. Raito only managed to arch a brow before L unexpectedly leaned sideways, head coming to a rest upon the brunet's shoulder. "…?" He made a small inquiring sound in the back of his throat and L sighed softly.

"I hope it doesn't bother Raito-kun that I'm borrowing his shoulder. It would seem that fatigue is catching up with me…" Raito didn't say anything at first, merely hummed in affirmation. He felt strangely awkward, eyes slightly averted, staring absently at the other people.

He noticed a group of young girls, probably around the age of fifteen, sitting in a small circle underneath a tree some bit away, and without thinking about it, he tried reading one of the girls' lips, only because he was curious, since the five girls seemed to be really close. He had never been in a group of friends like that, so he guessed he perhaps… was a bit jealous. Or maybe nostalgic.

Then he blinked, as the girl stopped speaking, green eyes locking on his before he looked away, mortified at have being caught, and slightly afraid that she would tell her friends. Not only about him looking at her… he glanced down at the detective, who with his eyes closed still borrowed his shoulder. Did it look strange…? Would there be five disgusted faces turned his way? He knew that people – even himself – often misjudged situations.

To his mortification, she pointed towards him, and four other heads turned in his general direction. He swallowed, trying to come up with a thousand different reasons for the scene, but then… He blinked, surprised, as they only gave a simultaneous smile and then turned back to each other again, chatting animatedly.

Maybe he was being paranoid. He remembered some girls back in his class when he was in their age. There had been going rumours that one of the boys in the parallel class was going out with a guy, and they had all voiced their obvious disgust to that information.

Perhaps… perhaps that had changed. Then he blinked, realizing where his thoughts were leading. He wasn't homosexual. He frowned deeply and allowed a small scowl to feature his face. That was not what he intended to think. It wasn't like he had to worry about anything like that… Really, why should he?

Just because he-… He cut off his thoughts again, shaking his head.

"Is something the matter, Raito-kun?" He stopped all movements, glancing down at L, watching the other's look change from curiosity to something that could be read as worry.

"N-not at all, I was just thinking… or rather, arguing with myself." He admitted, clearing his throat a bit nervously.

"That was a more violent argumentation with oneself then the ones I usually see, Raito-kun."

"I didn't intend to disturb you."

"It's quite alright – I shouldn't have dozed off in the first place." L sat up again, moving his neck to the side with a small cracking sound before resuming his usual sitting position, hands on top of his knees. "You seem somewhat distracted, you're sure nothing is wrong?"

"As I told you, I'm completely- **ouch**!" His sentence was clearly cut off as he was hit on the top of his head, probably by a falling object. But the only falling objects around here would be… He glanced down on the ground next to him, picking the red fruit up. "Apple."

L blinked, before they simultaneously looked up.

Ryuk coughed softly, looking slightly nervous but nothing more, and scratched the back of his neck. "Sorry, I dropped it."

"_When Newton saw an apple fall, he found, in that slight startle from his contemplation, 'tis said, a mode of proving that the earth turn'd round in a most natural whirl, called gravitation; and this is the sole mortal who could grapple, since Adam, with a fall, or with an apple_." L cited, in perfect English, causing Raito to look back at the detective. "Don Juan wrote that in 1821. Most – even if they aren't completely legible – sources claim that Isaac Newton based his research, which would ultimately lead to the world gaining knowledge about gravitation, from seeing an apple fall from a tree. Some even claim it hit his head." A tiny smile accompanied the last sentence, and Raito couldn't help but sport one himself.

"So what are you claiming now?"

"I'm not claiming anything, Raito-kun. If anything, Raito-kun is reading too much into my words and his large self-confidence makes him overanalyze the meaning. I merely remembered that quote upon seeing you get hit by the apple."

"That's what she said." Raito mentioned, adding a teasing tone to his voice as he took a bite of the fruit, hearing the shinigami above them let out something that sounded like a strangled protest. Realizing this wouldn't lead to anything, he rubbed his temple with his right hand, sighing.

"You really seem out of yourself, Raito-kun." L noted, blinking.

"I've been feeling… heavy… lately." He couldn't find a better word for it. He had started to sleep worse, after all – often waking up during the nights – and his paranoia was getting worse again, and it really wasn't helping his head.

"Heavy?"

"Well, yeah… and since you showed up…" He sighed softly again, taking another bite of the apple. "I haven't been able to focus really – I've felt strangely… restricted."

"Maybe… you've had too much time relaxing." L suggested, shrugging. "First three years of nothing hindering you… then the mild – but short-lived – disturbance of Mello and Near…" He paused for a moment, seeming to get caught in nostalgia for a moment, before continuing, "And since then – there really hasn't been anything going on. Your father resigned, and from the files at the NPA, Mogi got transferred to the FBI headquarters in the US, correct?"

"That's right. And Aizawa moved with his family to Kyoto. He's still working with us, from afar, but only Matsuda has contact with him."

"And you have no one, right? Just you and Ryuk."

"…For the last year, yes."

"_Life becomes useless and insipid when we have no longer either friends or enemies_."

"What?"

"Another quote – however I do not know who said it." Black eyes focused on him. "But what I mean is that, since you had no one opposing you anymore, you grew bored. Even if you continued being Kira… you lost a part of the thrill with it. There weren't nearly as many criminals to pass judgement on… and that bored you."

"That still doesn't explain why I would feel restricted now."

"Dullness creates thoughts. Thoughts play with your mind. No doubt you sometimes thought – or rather, wondered – if this was all worth it."

"Worth what?"

"Worth throwing your own happiness away." A tiny smile, even if sad, adorned the other's lips. "I don't think it was your justice that lead it all – it was the fact that you knew people would oppose you – that people would chase you – and you enjoyed the challenge. I think," those piercing eyes locked on his as he silently looked back, "that you were utterly bored from the beginning, and saw this as your resolve to end that boredom."

"…"

"But in the end, you started questioning it. And the thoughts that you might be wrong started to tear at you – especially after I returned to this world."

"I didn't start questioning it!" He protested. "I didn't even-"

"Otherwise you wouldn't have been so affected by what I have said." L cut him off, firmly, looking back out over the plantation. "The seeds of doubt were already there – I just forced them to grow."

Raito stared him in disbelief for a moment, before huffing. "So you suggest I'm feeling restricted because I feel burdened by the so-called 'sins' I committed?"

"The truth is…" L mumbled. "I think… that…" Obsidian pools that showed nothing of true emotions, turned against him, and Raito felt for a moment that he was frozen in place, even his breathing seemed to have stopped completely.

"…You are not only bound by the weight of your sins, but also by your guilt and my sacrifices."

"Your sacrifices?" Raito hesitated, as his voice was hardly above a whisper.

"You may not know it yet," L moved as if to rise up, "but I've sacrificed more than you might know for this sake. For **your** sake."

Raito almost wanted to ask 'for **my** sake?' but didn't since he knew he'd only sound like a parrot, if he only kept repeating what L said. So instead, to still keep the conversation going, he asked, "Well, I guess I'd get affected easier by 'your sacrifices' if I knew what they were."

"Of course." L mentioned, momentarily pausing. "However, if I'd tell you now, most of what I've done will probably be ruined."

"How do you mean?"

"I would have thought Raito-kun would've understood by now that I can not tell him." Raito frowned in something that he in his mind registered as his – nowadays – usual irritation.

"Of course I've understood **that** you can't, but not **why** you can't."

"Because, due to Raito-kun, we are still considered enemies. I do not want to jeopardize my queen since we are in a stalemate. Doing so would only ultimately lead to the loss of Raito-kun's life. You should be thankful."

"But I am not!" Raito growled. "Stop treating me like a child. You may be seven years older than me, but I am an adult."

L stared him for a second before slumping back towards the trunk of the tree, eyes closing. Raito was just about to open his mouth again when he spoke. "_A child becomes and adult when he realizes he has a right not only to be right, but also to be wrong_." Raito gaped at him for a moment while the black-haired male reopened his eyes and looked at him again. "Thomas Szasz, 1973."

"I don't care who said it!" Raito retorted, an angry scowl appearing on his face.

"Raito-kun is angry because he doesn't like being called a child. However, if you follow what Szasz said – he is still considered one." L nipped his thumb for a second while he waited for a reply. Raito didn't give him one, and so they fell in silence again. What had L meant with that, anyway? He knew he could be wrong – so why would he bring up a quote like that?

Unless, of course, if L meant him being Kira as the 'wrong' here. Then it would make perfect sense – that L didn't want to tell him what he had sacrificed before Raito ended Kira. Then again, that would mean there would never be a conclusion… only if…

He glanced down to his right pocket, knowing that he would have to decipher the mark if he wanted to figure this one out. He lifted his hand to his mouth, taking another bite out of the nearly forgotten apple, the sudden sound breaking the almost awkward silence around them.

His eyes caught sight of his watch, and he blinked and swallowed. "Oh, it would seem I have to leave about now."

"But Raito" He glanced up towards Ryuk, who was devouring yet another apple, hidden carefully from other people's view.

"I mean it – I don't want to be late." He had expected some sort of protest more, but the shinigami gave a small sigh and picked an additional apple to eat. Raito sat up straight and moved as if to stand up, but somehow he seemed to not be functioning correctly, for he stayed seated, even to the point that he frowned at himself.

"Weren't you going to leave, Raito-kun?" L asked, plainly.

"I am." Raito stated, firmly. He rose up, dusting his pants off. "I was just thinking… is there any way I can get in contact with you? Now that you changed hotels…"

"I'm living at Teitou Hotel. Room 413. I'm currently going under the name of Katsuyama Ryuzaki."

"Still sticking with Ryuzaki?"

"I like the name." L answered, still as simply as before. Raito glanced in the detective's direction and noticed that the reason for the other's almost absent answers was that L was currently focusing all his attention on the plate he had put beside him previously. Now, however, it seemed as if he was trying to find every last crumble of the cake, picking up every small piece found and was so absorbed in **finding** the last remnants of the pie that he didn't even properly eat them. Instead, the small crumbles were stubbornly sticking to both chin and the corners of his lips, and L paid no real attention to them.

Unable to contain the amused chuckle, Raito saw black orbs focus on him, questioning. Kneeling down again, the brunet clarified, still chuckling, "you're a messy eater at times."

"Hn?" L blinked, before seeming to realize what Raito meant, and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, absently brushing the escaped crumbles off on the grass. He then looked back at the brunet again, almost plainly, but with what could be a quizzical look.

"You still got…" Not able to think quickly enough to make him stop, he reached his right hand out and brushed the last few crumbles of the corner of the other's mouth with his thumb. Then he froze, eyes still locked with the detective's. He had, once again, acted before he thought.

And that was definitely bad. In his book that was very, **very** bad.

Coughing softly, he retracted his hand and opened his mouth to say something, but halted as his hand was grabbed, swiftly yet gently. Glancing down for only a second to notice the detective's thin fingers wrapped around his right wrist, he quickly moved his eyes back up to meet the detective's, only to find that the opaque pools were directed down towards their hands, almost contemplating. He even lifted his own hand experimentally, watching as Raito didn't make any movement to fight against it.

Raito resisted the urge to arch an eyebrow at the peculiar action, and instead tried to speak up. "Ryuzaki, I really…" but he choked on his breath as the raven-haired man's eyes fluttered close for the split part of a second as he licked the small crumbles from the brunet's thumb.

Eyes widening, Raito found himself straining against the hold that L had on his wrist, but L didn't seem to take any notice of this, black eyes reopening to look at him, still with a mix of curiosity and contemplation. Not breaking their locked gazes, Raito pulled at his hand once more, realizing that L did have a stronger grip that one could have guessed from his looks.

Of course, he'd known that for a long time… but it was a bit unsettling…

Without taking that piercing stare of the brunet, L moved his hand, and gently placed a kiss upon the flat of his palm. Swallowing audibly, Raito made another feeble attempt at retrieving his hand, experiencing another failure as the detective momentarily increased the grip on his wrist, almost up to a hurtful point. Almost as if realizing that he'd hurt the brunet, the grip loosened slightly and a kiss was placed just beneath the first, whereafter another followed, further down towards his wrist.

Raito bit his lower lip, before noticing the detective's grip on his wrist had almost completely disappeared. He quickly snatched his hand from the other, watching as the raven-haired man blinked in slight confusion at him. Despite the thought Raito had about just standing up and leaving, he somehow found himself grabbing hold of L's chin, tilting his head slightly even before he leaned in, eyes already closed the moment their lips connected.

L's response wasn't immediate, but as the brunet almost gently nipped at his lower lip, he yielded, a slightly shaky hand reaching Raito's face, tenderly caressing the skin before moving to his hair, as the detective's lips parted under Raito's own.

The kiss was short-lived, yet Raito felt somewhat at ease as he pulled back, even as he had realized that they had been in a public area and there were people around. It was… strange. He was usually much more careful… He kept his eyes down as he reopened them, though. He felt unwilling to meet the detective's eyes. Why he did not know. "Raito-kun."

"Hn."

"I think you have to leave now if you wish to arrive at the office in time." Raito glanced at his watch and snickered softly.

"I'm already running late."

"…" L paused for a moment. "I'm sorry to have kept you."

"It's not your fault." Raito shook his head, finally looking up, noting from the corner of his eyes how an elderly couple were glaring daggers in their direction, and decided to instead just focus on the detective. "I shouldn't have stalled."

A tiny smile crept onto the other's face. "I'm rather glad you did." Raito started, but then just rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, right. You enjoy seeing me suffer that much?" He snorted softly and stood up.

"I do not know what Raito-kun is talking about:"

"Even **if** I am at the top of the NPA, that doesn't mean I can come waltzing in late." Raito sighed in faked exasperation while correcting his tie. "But I bet you'll enjoy watching me try to make up an excuse."

"Might, might not." Still smiling quizzically, the detective stood up, absently brushing some stray bangs out of his eyes, a gesture Raito – truth to be told – had never seen. It was strangely… relaxed… for being L. He found himself stopping up for yet another second before clearing his throat.

"Well…uhm… I guess I'll see you around… then."

"Guess so." L shrugged softly and took a look around. "I must thank Ikanashi-san for recommending this place…" Raito narrowed his eyes.

"Wasn't it Yamamoto who had recommended it?"

"…" L halted, not looking at him, gaze focused out in the sky. Raito could almost see the images flashing before the detective's eyes as the raven-haired male sought his memory. "… Right. Of course. My mistake."

Either a mistake or it was all made up from the beginning. "Oh well. I'm already late as it is… so…" he made a faint gesture with his hand and then turned around and headed for the exit. He could hear the shinigami lift from the branches of the tree to follow him.

He never heard any reply from the detective, but as he left the plantation; his cell phone signalled an arrived message. Puzzled, he flipped it open and read the simple line, under a number he did not know.

"_At least like this I won't be unavailable"_

No sender, but it wasn't needed. A tender smile slid onto his lips without him noticing, as he kept walking, saving the number. He hesitated for a second when he was supposed to write in the name, but then nimbly hit the buttons.

_Lawliet_

He pressed the button to confirm his choice and then flipped the phone shut, putting it back in his pocket, the smile on his lips turning almost silly.

Ryuk, who had been silently floating behind him, suddenly snickered before starting to sing a song Raito had no idea where he could have learnt it. "Raito and L, sitting in a tree, K-I…"

"Oh shut it!" He growled, so that an old lady who just passed him, talking in her cell phone, suddenly looked up and gave him a scathing look which he ignored. He continued for a little while and listening to the shinigami's laughter before muttering, "as far as I know, the only one sitting in any tree was you. And all you did was eat apples."

Instead of shutting Ryuk up, as had been intended, it only made the shinigami's laughter louder. Infuriated and slightly embarrassed, Raito shoved his hand into his pocket, the other gripping his briefcase harder. Setting his face into an almost angry scowl, he promptly ignored the death god as he headed towards the nearest bus station.

**DeathNote **

He only wished to have a calm day today, figuring some things out, maybe try to figure out the code again… anything but this.

He had just closed the door to his office and was heading towards his desk when the sound of the door quickly opening and slamming shut met his ears. Placing his briefcase on his desk, he turned his head to meet the face of Hanaya, her expression something between anger and shock.

"Hanaya-san." He said, calmly. "What brings you here?"

"…T-Tell me I did not see what I thought I saw!" She sounded frantic, like a madman holding onto his last piece of sanity, and he arched a brow at her, picking out his pen to sign one of the papers that had been put on his desk.

"Well," he started, the first lines of the Kanji of his surname appearing on the paper as he wrote, "that is entirely depending on what it is you thought you saw, Hanaya-san."

She stood there for a moment, merely gasping for air, and he continued to write. Then, she suddenly hissed in a breath, the words afterwards spilling out of her mouth with the same sort of hiss. "I saw you kissing a man."

The pen cluttered to the surface of the table, scratching a line through the second kanji of his surname, as if to erase it, but he paid it no attention, eyes having darted over to the woman, widened in slight shock. "What!?"

"…I… saw you get on a bus this morning." Hanaya took a breath. "I… wanted to talk to you, so I took the next bus to the same location… and I looked for you when I arrived."

"…" He kept staring at her, her words not really getting through his muddled mind, the gears in his brain frantically trying to make up **some** sort of explanation.

"You… were talking with someone… so I thought I'd wait until your conversation was over…" Her eyes cast downward, and she sighed. "…and then… well…" She suddenly shook her head. "Tell me I saw it wrong!"

"…Your eyes show nothing more than truth, Hanaya-san… whether you believe it or not is up to your mind." He mumbled, feeling like slapping a hand for his forehead. **Slipping** like that… could it have turned out any worse?

"…B-But I thought… everyone thought…"

"Thought what?" He asked, bitterly.

"The way you talk with people… the way you constantly seem to try and smile but it's clouded by something entirely else… it… it draws people to you!" She huffed. "People want to come closer – want to understand and support! Want to be the one seeing a real smile for once! And… sometimes it just seems like your hinting… trying to get people closer."

"The only thing I have been hinting is that I'm not interested and that I'm seeing someone." He muttered, ignoring the shinigami behind him as Ryuk had found the situation amusing enough to laugh since the very start. Stupid Shinigami, stupid L, stupid Hanaya…

Stupid himself.

"…yeah… but…" She glared up at him. "As long as it had been a girl, I would have thought I had a chance! You…" She gritted her teeth.

"You should have least have told me you had a boyfriend!"

**In**conveniently enough, Matsuda had chosen that very moment to step through the door, whatever greeting he had planned to say stuck on his lips as the door fell shut behind him. A very awkward silence followed in which Raito mentally cursed in every language he knew and more, while Ryuk was now on the floor, seeming to die with laughter.

He was faintly struck with the wonder what L was doing. Probably having a blast and laughing in front of his stupid computer screen. Stupid detective…!

"A-ah…" Matsuda tried starting something but felt silent again as Raito sent him a direct glare which would have killed him, if Kira had the ability of killing with a mere glare. After silencing the man, he turned to Hanaya, who was looking embarrassed, probably realizing she'd done more bad than good.

"Hanaya-san, I am sorry if I offended you in any way… but… we can't speak of this now. If you still want to go through the issue… I have a free hour around two this afternoon." She didn't move and he continued, voice dropping to a colder tone. "…I would like it if you left now."

Surprisingly, she did so without a fuss, and after the door had closed behind her, Matsuda tried to test his luck again. "Ano… Raito-kun."

"One word," he growled, turning his glare to the man, "to my father and I'll feed you to Kira."

"…Of course." The man winced and Raito sighed, drawing a hand through his hair. Well, the damage was already done, as long as he could keep the word from travelling further, he'd just have to play along.

"Well… that's a great start of the day…" He muttered to himself, finishing signing the paper, ignoring the line drawn over the kanji for god, and put the pen down carefully this time. Then, without turning, he spoke up. "You wanted something, right?"

"Uh, yeah… about the papers I left here…"

"Just signed them." He motioned to the papers on the desk.

"…Good." Raito shook his head slowly and went around the desk to sit down. When he noticed Matsuda hadn't left yet, he gave the man a questioning look. "About what Hanaya-san said…"

"I don't want to talk about it." He cut off, not hiding the bitterness in his voice.

"…I figured…" Woah, so he **did** have something between his ears? "Just… It doesn't matter. To me, Raito-kun is still Raito-kun." Well great, try something less corny?

"I know." He sighed. "I know…"

"…So, do I know him?"

"I already told you I didn't want to talk about it!" He grumbled.

"…Just curious."

"…" He glared at the man, but then sighed. "No, I doubt you do. He's a foreigner."

"Oh…" Matsuda tapped his chin. "That kinda makes sense…" Kinda? Oh really now? Well, he had answered the question so hopefully- "So… why did you start going out with him?"

"…Matsuda…!"

"I mean, after all you said about the girls being too pushy after Misamisa's death…"

"…" He sighed again, then scratched his neck. "Well... he wasn't pushy… and… well, he was just… there."

"…Mhm… so what do you like about him?" Oh come on Matsuda, **GIRLS** question their friends about thee sort of things, not Policemen soon turning 31.

Even so, he decided to answer. Hopefully the man would really leave the matter alone once he was satisfied enough. "First of all, he's not clingy, dependant or simply after me for looks." Was Ryuzaki even after him? Doubtfully. "…also… he's smart. He has his standpoints and we can discuss them on a level I can't with anyone else since…"

"…Since Ryuzaki's death." Matsuda filled in, looking sober.

"…Yes." Better to just keep it up, seeming as if this person was not L, after all. That was the point. "So… we… well, match, I guess. Except that we have different viewpoints on some matters, so we argue a lot… but… it's interesting in a way. Takes away the boredom and… it's soothing. To just… be able to discuss the matters and not have to worry about explaining one's reasons for saying things… because he **knows**… so we merely… keep each other…"

"…Alive, perhaps?" He blinked, looking at the man. "I know you've been… less enthusiastic since Ryuzaki died… and even though you had Misamisa by your side and the case to worry about… you seemed to have lost your spirit. You never share your ideas… and I know it is because you know no one will be able to argue for or against your suggestion since…" He shrugged. "I know I'm not bright, so I just don't match up… but recently, Raito-kun seems to have gotten his spirit back. He's angry again, he's… sometimes smiling to himself… and he's eager to work again, it seems."

"…" Had it really been that way? Wasn't this all a story built up in his head right now to create an illusion? Had Matsuda, of all people, been able to read through him…?

"So whoever this person is, I am glad that he has given Raito-kun his spirit back… and I don't think your father will disapprove… since he's been worried about you too."

"…I'll still kill you if you tell him."

"…Naturally." Matsuda smiled. "Anyway, **one** last question?"

"I think you've had far too many 'last questions', Matsuda."

"One?" Raito sighed, and waved his hand absently.

"Shoot."

"What's his name?"

"…" He glanced out the window for a moment, and then looked back at the man, not realizing the almost nostalgic look on his face. "Lawliet."

"…" Matsuda smiled again. "Well, I should leave these to their appropriate owner." He motioned with the papers. "…I'll see you later."

"You do that-…" He said, watching the man go, and then turned to the shinigami, his expression suddenly one of murder. "**What is so damn funny!?**"

"You looked like quite the love-struck fool there, Raito." Ryuk laughed, and the brunet frowned. With a frustrated growl, he turned back to his work, only to have his cell phone ring. Flipping it open, he knew who it was without checking the number.

"Do you call me to taunt me too?" He snorted.

"_I was merely going to tell you that you talked yourself out of that situation rather well, Raito-kun."_ But since he could hear the contained laughter in the detective's voice, the brunet groaned.

"Come on! If **that** was 'talking myself out of it', then you have completely missed out on the point here, Lawliet." He had automatically switched to the other's surname in **case** Matsuda decided to come back.

"…" The other end was silent for a while before he spoke up. "_You know, that name sounds rather nice coming from your lips."_

"…Oh shut it." He shook his head and laughed, both out of anger and out of something that could be relief. Somehow it didn't seem all too bad when the façade was just like this. He could use it to stay away from Hanaya, and make Matsuda worry less… and he could laugh at the mere stupidity of it all. "This is all your fault!"

"_I'm well aware of the fact, Raito-kun, and I am terribly sorry."_

"Liar."

"_It's in my nature."_

"_Yagami-san?_" He blinked and pressed the button for the Intercom.

"Yes?"

"_You have a meeting in ten minutes, if you haven't forgotten._"

"I'm on my way." He broke the connection and returned to the call. "You heard, I have to end this call now."

"_I understand completely, Raito-kun. Have a good day at work."_

"Yeah, it did have a great start, didn't it?" He snorted and hung up, grabbing his briefcase, and then sighed, turning to the shinigami who was holding back laughter, trying to speak up. "…Not a word."

Which of course, led to the shinigami breaking down in hysterical laughter.

**DeathNote **

"Good morning, Yagami-san!" He returned the greeting with a small nod accompanied by a polite smile as he headed for the elevator, checking his watch to note that he was indeed in time. He didn't know what Matsuda had to talk about and frankly he did not care. He was merely angry with himself. It was now the eighth of October and he still hadn't figured it out.

L's mark, that meant.

Ryuk had found it very funny. Which usually meant that Raito was searching in the wrong direction. And that was annoying. The signs didn't give him anything, they were illogical and strange… There was no way to figure out the message by trying to translate the symbols.

But hell would freeze over before Yagami Raito admitted defeat.

He stepped out of the elevator and immediately received a, "Good morning!" He could hear Matsuda even before he saw him, and turned his head and gave a nod at the man as he closed in. "How are you?"

"…Fine." He gave a small shrug. "Is the meeting room free?"

"Yep. I checked it all!" Matsuda smiled proudly and started walking down the hallway. "Should we start?"

"I doubt you have anything interesting, but very well." He smirked a little as Matsuda gave a nervous laugh at the retort. Somehow the man didn't go quite as much on his nerves as before. He didn't really know why, but somehow the other's idiocy was rather relieving.

No, he was not going soft. Definitely not.

As they turned the next corner, he suddenly found himself eye to eye with Hanaya. She hadn't spoken to him since her outburst a few days earlier, and now she looked frightened as she realized who she'd bumped into. Before he could even try to say anything, she had fled down the corridor.

It was not like he cared, but it was annoying and people would soon start asking questions about what he did.

But somehow Matsuda read his expression wrongly and said, in an attempt to be a comfort, "it's not your fault, Raito-kun. She'll think it over and she'll calm down."

"…" He sighed and kept going, the older man following.

"Oh, and speaking of Hanaya not talking to you…" Matsuda quickened his steps to come up next to him. "How's your love life?"

Raito pretended to not have heard him, pushing the door to the meeting room open with ease and going inside.

"I know, it's none of my business, but…"

"We haven't spoken in a while." He said, simply, sitting down and taking out some papers from his briefcase.

"…Why not?"

"No reason, nothing's come up…" Well, that was the truth, but it sounded… dry, in a way.

"Come on, must you have a reason to talk?" Oh Matsuda, if you only knew. Raito didn't say anything though, just sighed and motioned for him to start. "Oh, yeah. The two girls who were revived! I made some research and found out that they hadn't done anything more than stealing some food! So the media lied!"

"That's common knowledge, Matsuda. Besides, Kira sees no difference between petty theft and murder nowadays." Matsuda looked a little put down but then put on a firm expression.

"Even so! We should file a report against the TV-stations and the news agencies behind it!"

"What would it lead to?" Raito had picked up the small note where he'd written the code for the mark on, gazing at it with a frown while talking. "All that would happen would be that Kira becomes angry, kills everyone behind it, and then it would go on like that."

"…I guess you're right." Matsuda sighed. "Is this case hopeless?"

"No." Raito shook his head. "Only near impossible. Kira kills with a **NOTEBOOK**. The only _quick _way would be confiscating every notebook in the world and test them to see if someone dies, but **that** is impossible. The other way is to somehow catch Kira in the act, or wait until it ebbs out."

"…Wait until Kira dies? That could take very long time."

"…Someday it will end, one way or another." Raito muttered, knowing to himself that so would not be the case, there would always be some way to pass on the job, but to make Matsuda a bit satisfied.

"…Someday…" The man sighed, the sound followed by footsteps. "What're you looking at?" And without further ado the paper was ripped from him. He opened his mouth to protest but then Matsuda hummed. "A code?"

"Something like that. But the symbols don't make sense." He felt angry at himself for admitting it, but knew that it wouldn't change anything. Like Matsuda would know more than-

"Hey, this reminds me of something!" He blinked, and looked up at the man, as Matsuda walked over to the whiteboard. "I mean, if we can't have to figure the symbols out, we have to act as if we play hangman."

"Hang…man?"

"Like this!" Matsuda drew eleven small strokes next to each other. "Next, fill in the letters you know…" He wrote out the letters. "…and these two are the same, so let's put a circle around them…"

"And the rest?" Raito asked, having looked down at his papers in slight disinterest. This was what he'd been doing, so…

"Leave them blank." Blank? What the.

"Why so?" He started to look up.

"Symbols are there to confuse us. So if we don't know what they mean, we can just exclude them…" The words seemed to dissipate as Raito's eyes focused on the board, widening only the slightest of degrees. "…Now only to figure out-" The man cut himself short as Raito abruptly stood up. "Huh?"

"Matsuda…" Raito started, grabbing his briefcase and heading for the door. "You're a genius!"

Without explaining himself further, he exited the room and fell into a small sprint towards the elevator. Now, afterwards, he felt really stupid for not having been able to see such a simple solution.

The annoyance of having a complicated mind.

Pressing the button of the elevator, he fished up his cell phone and called a number. After a few signals had gone through, Ryuzaki answered. "_Yes?"_

"Is Jyiva there?"

"…_Uh, yes, but what…"_

"Tell him I figured it out. I want to speak with him. At my place, in fifteen minutes."

"_Shall I follow along?"_

"That won't be necessary." He left the elevator and headed for his car. "Just Jyiva. It's nothing important, anyway."

"_You're an awful liar, Raito-kun. But just because you asked so nicely…" _without any other word, the detective hung up.

By the time he had gotten into his car and driven out of the parking lot, Raito frowned, mind settling on something that annoyed him. He recited it in his head once, just to confirm it to himself.

Blank – a – blank – a – blank – (blank) – blank – a – (blank) – t – o

Y - a – g – a – m – (i) – R – a – (i) – t – o

If that was the contract of the curse… then something with **him** was holding the key to Ryuzaki's reviving powers…

…Why else would L have **HIS** name carved onto his body?

**DeathNote **

He didn't know if he'd expected the tenshi to await him when he returned home, but it was both startling and relieving. For one, he was annoyed that despite fifteen minutes in the car, he still hadn't figured out the connection of himself to L's contract. Something about it just didn't make any sense.

"L said you had figured it out." Jyiva said, simply, as he entered the living room and sat down on the couch to be opposite of the otherworldly being.

"At least what it says." He said, firmly. "…So I **do** have some questions."

"If you've really figured it out, I'm sure you do." Without saying anything more, it appeared that Jyiva was just going to wait and see what the brunet asked. Annoying tenshi…

"Well, first of all… why **my** name!?" He shook his head. "It doesn't make any sense in any way. Why did he choose such a thing for-" The tenshi raised one hand, and he silenced.

"First of all. L didn't **choose** anything. The contract is based off the person's heart, and the price of it is usually something that has a special value to the person."

"…" Now that made it even more confusing. How did Raito have any special value to Ryuzaki? "So… why my name?"

"L was surprised too, and when I told him the details of it, he almost laughed at me, asking me how it would ever be possible for him to break it." Jyiva smiled a little. "Shows how little humans sometimes know about themselves."

"…I'm still waiting for my answer." Raito mentioned, leaning forward slightly, seeing Ryuk in the corner of his eyes as the shinigami seemed to also be greatly interested in this piece of information.

"I am well aware of that fact." Jyiva smiled a cryptic little smile that was even more annoying than the wait. He **needed** that answer. Of course, it had struck him a couple of times, **why** the tenshi, who wanted him stopped, wanted to help him in any sort of way. Then again, he knew from experience that otherworldly beings were different from humans.

"…so?" He asked, slowly.

Jyiva slowly moved some silverfish hair from his eyes, fixing him with a stare. "You are sure you want to know? The information **might** just change some of your viewpoints."

"Am I sure?" Raito almost laughed. These last two months had been… irritating to say the least. Interesting, but irritating. Actually, it was funny. He no longer having the detective around, he was good to talk to and kept things interesting. But his power to revive people… was very inconvenient, for sooner or later someone would find out.

"…Are you?" Jyiva still smiled and now even Ryuk seemed to get annoyed.

"Come on, he has been waiting for an answer for a while now, so go ahead and give it to him." Says the shinigami who wouldn't tell him what the mark read from the beginning…

"Very well." Still holding Raito's gaze with a pointed sort of half-glare, the tenshi spoke up, with a voice calm enough to seem as if he was talking about the weather. "The contract is based of three general parts. Memories, feelings, and dreams. By collecting what is closest to the human tenshi's heart based on these three are called the 'subject'. It can be anything, a certain movie, it just has to fit into all the categories at the time of the contract's sealing."

"So, I'm the 'subject'?"

"You can say that." Jyiva nodded. "Next, based of the subject, the contract extracts 'bases', parts of the 'subject' based on the priority of 'importance to the human tenshi'. Sometimes the Human Tenshi is aware of the base, but sometimes the base comes from the subconscious part of him or her, and can therefore confuse them."

"So, bases… how many?"

"Depends on the person, but usually only around four or five."

"…Complicated procedure."

"That's mainly because the contract **must** have importance. At any rate, the bases are not split up more, but rather adjusted and collected to one thing."

"The contract."

"Correct. Sometimes, however, the contract bases on one focus point and leaves the other bases in the background."

"…So, how did L's look like?"

"If you'd been a tenshi, you could have read the designs to know." Jyiva smiled. "The Subject, as you've realized, is 'Yagami Raito'. That's the title of the contract, too. The bases were 'rivalry', 'affection' and 'betrayal'."

"…That sounds… about right." Raito snorted.

"So did L also say. The contract, however, surprised him. Because the priority level decides the main focus of the contract, and he thought your betrayal would lay him closest. However, the main focus was his subconscious affections for you."

"…Wha-?"

"The contract is read," Jyiva cut him off, looking calm as ever, "_L Lawliet is bound under contract to never, by any reasons or during any circumstances, act upon his affections for Yagami Raito in a way that goes beyond the border of the emotional. Upon entering this contract, L Lawliet agrees to the terms and will know the consequences of breaking the contract."_

"…What's that supposed to mean?" He asked, slowly, almost hearing the puzzle pieces falling to place in his head in a way that was rather frightening.

"Generally speaking…" Jyiva said, slowly, still seeming unaffected and even slightly amused by Raito's sudden defensive manner. "The contract…" Jyiva locked eyes with him once more, revealing the secret which Raito had sought.

"...Will break the moment L Lawliet indulges in the act of sexual intercourse with Yagami Raito."

**Well, how's that?**

**I think I'll insert a well-needed 'DUN-DUN-DUUUUUUN' here XD**

**Okay, we ALL got the secret of the mark/contract now… but what will RAITO do (hum, it says 'Yaoi' up at the top, so I guess we all know what it will END with, but ya know)**

**As for reviews, I got TONS of them (80 on so I CAN'T reply to them (or you'd have to wait at least another day)**

**However, some people were angry at me (angry? Maybe) for making 'Matsuda seem stupid' and 'Hanaya being a flat character' and 'L being weak'.**

**Okay, I get what you mean, but let's not forget ONE thing.**

**This story is from RAITO'S POINT OF VIEW. Has Raito EVER found Matsuda to be smart? Don't think so. So Raito only takes notice to the times when Matsuda is being stupid… again. Hanaya is seriously in love with Raito (much like Misa, but she's not a model nor a killer) but to him she's annoying. So she is in the story until he figures her out. I mean, the times in the manga where Raito and Misa are together, she acts and seems VERY stupid. But all of a sudden gasp when she's alone, she seems to even have a brain! It's depending on the point of view.**

**As for L, Raito notices 'new' things now he's a bit more relaxed. L is not L anymore, he can't tell the world about him without getting laughed at, seriously. So Raito doesn't see the analytical, 'fearsome' and calm L, he sees L for a human being since he's no longer 'any threat to him' (except for awakening dead people, that is.)**

**Hope that sorted it out.**

**And '…'** **(on I KNOW I made a mistake. It has been mentioned before, and I'm sorry. And even though I also am 350 sure L would know the difference, L is not writing this story, and I had mixed the psychological disorders up. Sorry, I apologize for not knowing all about them, I just tried.**

**That goes a bit for everyone who mentions plotholes, mistakes in my research (which is almost nonexistent) and stuff like that – this story started as a forty-five minute protest against L's death (AKA chapter 1). The rest is… well, I dare say – completely winged. It's for kicks, guys. I don't have a lot of thought behind stuff, so I create a lot of plotholes with my own plot twists. And as I said about my research nonexistent. I come up with stuff, if I'm completely at a loss, I ask someone. I'm not L, I'm not a novelist and I'm certainly not someone who knows everything.**

**I'm just a random person behind a computer screen, writing a story for my own and others reading pleasure. Constructive criticism, sure, but please, I can't know everything. If I had been J.K. Rowling, I'd allowed you to flame my plotholes how MUCH you'd wanted, but since I'm not earning any money on typing this story for others to read, I think I'm allowed to have some mistakes, plotholes and stuff in it.**

**My Point: criticize the flow of the story, the grammar mistakes, the, I don't know, random OOCness that in my mind is character development. But don't flame me when I happen to choose the wrong psychological disorder and then just leave. Mention it nicely together with other facts (perhaps parts you liked!?)**

**I'm sorry for sounding angry, but it's stuff like that which disrupts my writing – I'm (sadly) a very sensitive person.**

**Please forgive me.**

**ANYWAY! On to other stuff has gotten Coca Cola and chocolate to lighten my mood I hopefully (Definitely!) won't take this long with chapter 15, but I STILL beg you (even though I, myself, am terrible at it)**

**PLEASE leave a review! It makes me write faster! (note – review, not flame. Savvy?)**

**Until next time!**

**/Keyhala**


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